Leftfield44

I have a DUI and a Refusal from 2016. I also screwed up at my last job. I was making six figures. How do I go back to my field? When in the interview process do I let them know these things? My father died in 2012. After that I had to take care of my mother. I lost a lucrative business because I missed too much work. I started drinking to self-medicate some severe PTSD, depression & anxiety that came up following his death & taking care of a difficult mother, who still drinks a lot. We don't have contact anymore. I sit, every day, depressed that I ruined my life and can't get it back. I feel pretty hopeless. Prior to falling apart, I had an impressive work history, college, etc. How do I go back out into the world? Especially, the high paying jobs in very qualified for? Also, to add insult to injury, I am declaring bankruptcy because of business losses & some bad decisions I made while drinking. Can anyone out there relate or give me even a little bit of hope? I'm highly qualified, but there is some wreckage for sure in my past.

MyLittleHorsie

You are going to have to be as honest as necessary.

The bad part is, bankruptcy and a dui make you uninsurable and you cannot be bonded. Add in potential vulnerable sector screening, it is tough. I would seek out an agency or legit head Hunter.

Anna

Maybe you will be able to get back to working in the same field you had been, and making a great salary. But, maybe you won't get it back, not the way it was. Maybe you need to look for a job in a different field and at a lower salary. The main thing, mentally and financially, would be to get back to work of some sort and to start to move forward with your life. Keep an open mind and a positive attitude and you will get through this.

AnvilheadII

start where you ARE not where you were. tomorrow you probably won't GET that six figure gig......that is not to say that you never will again, but for now, think small, think smart. don't let ego get in the way....be humble and willing. staying sober is absolutely essential.....

daredevil

If you were earning 6-figures, chances are that you have transferable skills that you can leverage into a new career. I’d consider these skills and develop relevant new ones in the interim. And I’d do whatever I needed to do to show employers, the court system, etc., that I was serious about sobriety (going to meetings, seeking treatment, etc.) That would be where I start, and I’d build on that.

Dee74

A fathers death, severe PTSD, depression & anxiety & taking care of a difficult mother are all valid reasons for a gap in your CV, IMO.

You haven't ruined your life because your life's not over yet

You may not be able to work immediately in your chosen field and those 6 figures will be along way off for now but any job is better than none, and the more stuff you have for your CV the less those gaps will matter?

D

Zebra1275

If you are filing for bankruptcy this may be financially out of reach, but I would look for a professional career coach.

Wastinglife

I have also ruined my career. I have a DUI on record and bankruptcy. Also, many gaps in my CV. Fired from many jobs. I can't pass a background check and have had many job offers rescinded as a result. Now, I raise too many red-flags and am practically unemployable. I am educated and used to work in finance. That industry is quite strict with their vetting. In fact, I can't even get a job at McDonald's. I am pretty much screwed forever. Hopefully, your situation is not as grim

Delilah1

I would definitely talk to a headhunter, or someone who can help you determine the next career steps. You definitely have very valid reasons for gaps in employment, and responding that you took time off to care for family members is very reasonable.

I am not in the financial industry, but my husband and I had to file a Chapter 13 Bankruptcy due to a combination of his job loss, a medical disability for me, and some stupid financial choices. We aremaking a large payment each month. It will not be finished for another three years or so, and it was not a fun process, but once it was filed and we had a plan in place I felt much less anxious.

There are lots of jobs you can apply for with a skill set that allowed you to have a six figure income. Looking forward to hearing the good things in your future.

jhonnyspa

Hi leftfield44,
I will answer your question in a philosophical way, If you are seriously wounded it takes time to heal, how long does it take to heal? Answer: That all depends on the damage you have done or the strides you take to get your self better.Alcoholism does not discriminate it is cunning, baffling and all powerful. I also have a university degree, as a lawyer, it is only a piece of paper it means nothing unless I can feel happy in my profession and using it for the greater good as for money who needs a six-figure sum, I would rather try to stay sober= happiness and collect cans on the street, then to be rich, and a missable drunk.Good luck on your journey to enlightenment.

JoeCree

I would tackle each thing one by one. First and foremost I presume you are serious about sober living?
Secondly you should be downgrading all frivolous and excessive spending, and downsizing living arrangements.

Sell off all your needless items, like car etc.. once you get rid of everything, you will feel a huge weight lifted from your shoulders.

After you go through your bankruptcy, you will be living off of cash for the next several years. This is a good thing, and you need to simply spend within your means.

Im not sure which line of work you are in, but if it is professional you may want to consider a fallback career. If it is in business, like sales and marketing then I would suggest scouting the company you really want to work for. Lets say you were making 6 figures at "Home Depot" HQ... i wouldnt advise trying to get that job back, instead I would suggest getting a job at an actual Home Depot store. If you have the abilities to show you are way above what your title says, people notice really fast (especially with millennials entering the workforce).

In a few years you will have made your way back to HQ, only this time with a hell of a success story that will give you greater leadership qualities.

Good luck.

Gottalife

First deal with the drink problem. Maybe you can just stop and your problems will solve themselves, or maybe you are an alcoholic and you will need to use a program of recovery.In either case, if the drink problem doesn't get solved, there will be nothing else.

Leftfield44

I appreciate everybody's responses. I'm very serious about not drinking again. That is number one.

As for my career, I still have a very impressive resume and work history. And my field, IT management, etc. There is a shortage of quality people. If I'm just honest, will it help? I have my PMP, which works in my favor. I also was planning on getting two more certifications that are hard to get. Luckily, I'm good at the test taking.
I just feel hopeless right now. I'm scared I've ruined everything.

PalmerSage

Having a PMP and a background in IT management is outstanding. As for disclosure, I would provide honest answers to any questions that I was asked, but I would not answer questions that no one asked me, if that makes any sense. For example, if asked about gaps in your resume, I would mention caring for a family member and leave it at that. If asked about past offenses, I would be honest but sometimes (small employers in particular) may not ask. You may also want to consider starting a consulting business if that interests you. Good luck!

Stride34

If it were me, I'd consult an expert on how to best explain the gaps. Employers (at least in the US) generally aren't very high on people with a major history of mental health issues, and while maybe not fair, I'm not sure I totally blame them. Good luck.

Buckley3

I can definitely relate.

38 days ago I was charged with my 3rd. First was back in '96. 2nd was 11 years ago.

I'm facing some harsh stuff. Thought I had a refusal coming too - but apparently I got lucky. I know how tough that can be.

Seems to me you are on the back end by now? 2 years ago? I figure it will take me that long at least to get back to a relative state of normalcy.

I don't think you have to tell anyone. Not sure what state you are in, but here in WI it's not a felony until the 4th.

I too am looking at possibly losing my house - maybe bankruptcy. The costs of this thing came at a very bad time and my history of drinking and bad financial responsibility hasn't helped.

All we can do is move forward. Have you been drinking? If you have - stop. Nothing will improve until you do. "Our lives became unmanageable" with booze in the picture.

Stick around. PM me if you want. I don't mind sharing details about my situation.

Last - look. An OWI and all that is bad but if you are qualified and have a good track record of producing at work you shouldn't have a problem. I sense that you are just feeling a bit overwhelmed at all the change and coming through the OWI and the financial stress. Just take it one day at a time.

Once you get your foot back in the door you should fly right through. You aren't a record and you aren't your past. You are you. Get your foot in and people will see you for who you really are.

But, of course, if booze is still an issue that's gotta go.

-B

PS - I said you don't have to tell anyone - but even if you do tell the truth I bet you'll find people don't care as much as you think they may. You made a mistake, you dealt with it. People love that shiz.

Leftfield44

Thank you for the encouragement. Much appreciated. I will definitely PM you. I do feel overwhelmed. I haven't been drinking for over 6 months. I really want my life back. While many of my problems come from drinking, I also had to experience some very, very difficult situations.

When I buried my father, I paid for everything & it was never repaid to me even though it was supposed to. We had two have two funerals/memorials. One in the town he died in and then one at Arlington National Cemetery. It cost me my own business (missed too much work helping my mother, etc). Plus I spent 36k & was not paid back. There is a slew of challenges I faced that just made me drink more & more to self-medicate. Ugh. A lot of bad things happened. But I should be thankful for what I do have. Thank you again.

Rainman1

Hey Guys
I just want to say that DUI's are not the end of the world, I got my 3rd this past May, In TX, 3 is a felony, My first 2 were over 30 years ago so my lawyer was able to get my charges dropped to 2 DWI repetition, which means it was dropped down to a misdemeanor. Here in TX there are bill boards up that say DWI "You Cant Afford It" $17k. There not lying. So far I've been able to keep up with the expenses of my DWI. In another month I'll have 1 year of sobriety, in that time my sobriety counter says I have saved over 6k, 2 more years and I'll break even. LOL.
As far as work, I'm fortunate that I did not loose my job, I told my bosses the truth about what was going on.
I believe in my higher power whom I choose to call GOD, without him I would not be where I'm at today. I pray most every day asking him to help me stay sober TODAY and to guild me to do his will not mine. It hasn't been all peaches and cream but it has gotten better.

Rainman

Gottalife

When I got on that bus the same thing happened. Lack of power was my problem, and this was how I got the Power to live by. AA is all about power.

My father died. I gave a lot of money to my mother to help clear a debt that my father's business had, she, an alcoholic, repaid me by doing the nastiest thing she could think of. My sponsor died. My wife became terminally ill and died after two years of the most dreadful suffering. In the process her sister and brother inlaw did some serious damage to our business.

People can be nasty. They let you down all the time. Yet I was given the power stay sober and perform my responsibilities, nursing my wife, taking care of our children and business, without the thought of a drink. It never occurred to me. The problem stayed removed. That's power.