16YearsDrunk

My friend is an alcoholic. He's a heavy binge drinker. He's someone who starts with 1 beer and finishes on 15. He's tried multiple times to get clean but can't. He's at the stage where he makes excuses such as:

• She drives me to it. She does my head in. Only with her for the kids
• I've never been to AA and I'm not religious so I can't do 12 steps
• I dont drink that much anymore
• Im not an alcohlic like I dont wake up and need a drink

We spoke the other day on the phone and he expressed how he wants to try and stop. He was diagnosed with a fatty liver about 3 years ago so he's already at a point where he's heading for issues. He complains of pains in his flank. Stomach issues. He has lots of calcium deposits throughout his body.

There's nothing I can do to help. I told him I'm sober, and I'm doing good. I told him to register on here too and get some advice. But, he called yesterday on the phone and he was down the pub.

I worry for him. He's been a good friend from childhood. Many times in the past we abused alcohol together. I think he is part of the reason why I started drinking at a young age ... but I can see the path he's heading down. It's not a good one.

Boxing day he drank near enough an entire bottle of brandy, and port, plus beers. He has an insane tolerance for alcohol.

He's also had issues with cocaine. I don't know if he still does. He tells me he doesn't so I'll take his word for it. Health wise he can't be in good shape as he spends much of his time at the computer. A very sedentary lifestyle with little exercise.

Many of us have been where he is, but I don't know how to help him. I have a gut feeling if he doesn't sort himself out soon he could be heading for serious health problems (if he hasn't already).

Danielle423

Sadly there is nothing you can do to help him get sober unless he is fully dedicated to the process and wants it desperately for himself. You can be there for him, you can try to support him, and you can talk about personal experiences but at the end of the day until he puts his whole body, mind, and soul he will not get sober no matter what you do or say.

I know how hard it is to watch someone continue to struggle with addiction, I hope your friend finds it in himself to get sober before he destroys his health beyond repair.

Jim1958

I have a friend I have known since college. He has been fired from jobs for being drunk. Every time I Skype with him he is drinking. His sister and father did an intervention on him a few years ago. He only lasted a month or two before drinking again. I struggle myself, so I can't preach to him. I'd like to help him but I don't know how.

Stronger2017

I’d just keep being a good role model. If he wants to join you in doing healthy stuff that’s great😀 I definitely wouldn’t just hang around with whilst he drinks. Not good for you or him IMO.

Dee74

I think by being there to talk a little you've already helped 16.
What I wanted most of all back then was to be heard and understood.

Your journey may very well be inspiration for him..when he's ready

D

Eddiebuckle

There aren't degrees of alcoholism, only degrees of delusion.

Nobody can make us want to get and stay sober, we have to want it enough to do what it takes - every single day. Unfortunately, some of us don't live long enough to come to that conclusion. My mother was one of those unfortunates.