Dee74

You could always vary the meetings , locations and groups if you felt things were a bit stale Kejun?

D

Berrybean

Or perhaps get a sponsor and work the 12-step recovery program, and get to some of the meetings that are study meetings as well as the general share meetings.

Often it's when I least want to go to a meeting that I most NEED to go to a meeting.

BB

wayforward

What should be more important to you right now is YOU and your sobriety. I understand that you have feelings and breakups can suck, but regardless of what happens with you and her, you should really be taking this as an opportunity to focus on yourself. Distance and no contact with your ex is a good thing right now.

I just got out of a relationship that was heavily swayed because of my drinking. It was very rocky and on and off again, but what I've only realized recently is that getting back together with her, regardless of how nice she was, was only holding me back and setting me up for another relapse. My alcoholism became intimately intertwined with my on and off again relationship.

We've been broken up, and usually this is where I would start to drink a lot more. But I decided to do things differently. I just...didn't drink. I soldiered through the pain, and what's happened is that I'm starting to see things a lot differently. I'm focusing on myself, surprising myself. Tapping into the potential.

Anyway, keep up the sobriety. Set goals, build routines, write if it helps you, and give things with your ex time and distance. Trust me, it will be better for you that way.

Kejun

Day 13,

Stubbornness whisked up with remnants of a drunk's delusions present ideas that I need (and am trying) to accept just arent accurate.

wayforward - I never looked at our relationship as on/off but then it was always me who created the problems, because of alcohol. Someone spoke of perception yesterday and the way I view(ed) the relationship will be altogether different to the way my ex does/did.

Due to the drink, I ***** it.

Over the past week (first one was a blur), I have been working on me. I feel progress every day, I have come back from my sixth run in six days and the fitness has improved greatly already.

Distance and no contact with the ex is important. I saw her yesterday, we drove past eachother, I saw it was her and looked forward, no head movement, maybe she saw me, maybe she didnt... It doesnt really matter.

Another day sober.

DontRemember

I go to the same meeting location now more times than not now. A lot of it is the same old faces/stories. What I've been doing is reading the daily reflection first thing in the morning and if I go to a meeting that day, I think about what has changed for me that relates to the days reflection. Sure a lot of old timers just repeat the same thing basically every day,but when I share on that days reflection, it seems to get the group to speak towards that focus/content. I mean...Imagine going to meetings daily for 10-35+ years and their stories are going to be on a 'loop' at times. Also..when I notice they're getting into the same old same, I'll try and catch something that I've not heard before, because I shut my brain down once I think I know what's coming next.

Ken0331

You know, 4 or 5 meetings to a group just isn't enough to see what the group is really like.

If you go there long enough, often enough, you'll see different people. Some stay and hang around. Some don't . . . catch my meaning here?


I go to get out of my house, out of my head, and into the mainstream of life. Frequently I join a group going out for dinner after. Sure, the stories might seem to be the same, but I've found I'd needed to hear something said in nearly every meeting I've attended.