Resolved to stop.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 14
Resolved to stop.
Hi all,
I've rejoined SR after a long absence and unrestrained drinking. It has only gotten worse with all attempts at moderation. Consumption has been high and has gone so covert that I'm considered the healthy drinker in our social circles. I had a moment of complete awareness of the insanity of my life when I was asked by a friend if I could work with him on getting sober. Between the two of us he was the only honest person in the room that day.
I got sober through SR and after many months fell off and then continued to fall off. I finally quit logging in out of humiliation and the realization that I probably wasn't going to stop. To my friends who saw my drinking stop completely during those times I was a success story and I've let them believe it. For whatever reason the conversation with my friend last week and the attendant hypocrisy of the situation caused me to really look at what a fraud I've become. He helped me rather than the other way around.
I won't drink tonight and this will be day one.
I've rejoined SR after a long absence and unrestrained drinking. It has only gotten worse with all attempts at moderation. Consumption has been high and has gone so covert that I'm considered the healthy drinker in our social circles. I had a moment of complete awareness of the insanity of my life when I was asked by a friend if I could work with him on getting sober. Between the two of us he was the only honest person in the room that day.
I got sober through SR and after many months fell off and then continued to fall off. I finally quit logging in out of humiliation and the realization that I probably wasn't going to stop. To my friends who saw my drinking stop completely during those times I was a success story and I've let them believe it. For whatever reason the conversation with my friend last week and the attendant hypocrisy of the situation caused me to really look at what a fraud I've become. He helped me rather than the other way around.
I won't drink tonight and this will be day one.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,576
It's good to see you again, Fitsom - I'm so glad you decided to return and reclaim your sobriety.
I wasted so many years insisting I could control what I drank. Always looking for the fun it once was. I had crossed the line years ago and could never return to social drinking. I was a slow learner, but once I admitted I couldn't touch a drop, my new life began. You can do it, Fitsom.
I wasted so many years insisting I could control what I drank. Always looking for the fun it once was. I had crossed the line years ago and could never return to social drinking. I was a slow learner, but once I admitted I couldn't touch a drop, my new life began. You can do it, Fitsom.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,518
Welcome back, Fitsom,
I think one of the most disturbing aspects of alcoholism for me, was the lying and deception involved in being a closet drinker. I completely lost myself. I'm glad you have decided to make this work.
I think one of the most disturbing aspects of alcoholism for me, was the lying and deception involved in being a closet drinker. I completely lost myself. I'm glad you have decided to make this work.
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