Just fed up of myself
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Join Date: Aug 2017
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Thanks 🙂 I don't really know how to get out of it unless I just go in to hand my present over and leave? I could maybe see if my husband could just go himself if I don't feel strong enough I won't go well found out this morning the other night I fell in a bush in front of people in the street I have just moved here as well! Just have to keep reminding myself of all this! my stomach is still aching but much better than yesterday and I still managed to enjoy sometime with my friend it was a complete struggle!
Originally Posted by CreativeThinker 
If you are 100% committed to sobriety, skip the party. As Berrybean stated, you will have plenty of time to go to outings once you have been sober for some time.
Congrats on making the decision to change your life!
Congrats on making the decision to change your life!
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Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Re the party - You could just explain that you've been under the weather (that would have certainly been a good description of me for the first few weeks sober), and ask if it would be possible to meet her when you're well to give her your gift and perhaps treat her to coffee and cake somewhere nice.
It's a party. There will be plenty of other folk there. She will cope. Honestly.
Re the cringe at falling in a bush in your recent incident - please try not to dwell on it too much. If your new neghbours ever question why you're not drinking you cn at least grin and tell them you value their shrubbery too much. Make light of it in such a way that you acknowledge the incident but are resolute about not repeating it. If you did any damage to a neighbours property you could always go round with a bunch of flowers and apologise, with an assurance that it won't happen again.
It will soon be old news. That's the way with gossip.
BB
It's a party. There will be plenty of other folk there. She will cope. Honestly.
Re the cringe at falling in a bush in your recent incident - please try not to dwell on it too much. If your new neghbours ever question why you're not drinking you cn at least grin and tell them you value their shrubbery too much. Make light of it in such a way that you acknowledge the incident but are resolute about not repeating it. If you did any damage to a neighbours property you could always go round with a bunch of flowers and apologise, with an assurance that it won't happen again.
It will soon be old news. That's the way with gossip.
BB
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Join Date: Aug 2017
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Thanks BB,
So good to talk to others about all this was talking to my sister who was like you don't have a problem. I was llike like to her I definitely do.
Then my friend went home today after spending three days with us I felt the urge a little bit but I know that's just because I'm feeling a bit alone! So just keeping as busy as I can today! Still worrying about my liver think I'm still having anxiety but again trying to not think to much hate when my mind goes overboard 😂
So good to talk to others about all this was talking to my sister who was like you don't have a problem. I was llike like to her I definitely do.
Then my friend went home today after spending three days with us I felt the urge a little bit but I know that's just because I'm feeling a bit alone! So just keeping as busy as I can today! Still worrying about my liver think I'm still having anxiety but again trying to not think to much hate when my mind goes overboard 😂
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Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 1,476
Originally Posted by Sofedupofthis
Thanks BB,
So good to talk to others about all this was talking to my sister who was like you don't have a problem. I was llike like to her I definitely do.
Then my friend went home today after spending three days with us I felt the urge a little bit but I know that's just because I'm feeling a bit alone! So just keeping as busy as I can today! Still worrying about my liver think I'm still having anxiety but again trying to not think to much hate when my mind goes overboard 😂
So good to talk to others about all this was talking to my sister who was like you don't have a problem. I was llike like to her I definitely do.
Then my friend went home today after spending three days with us I felt the urge a little bit but I know that's just because I'm feeling a bit alone! So just keeping as busy as I can today! Still worrying about my liver think I'm still having anxiety but again trying to not think to much hate when my mind goes overboard 😂
Glad to see you're holding strong. The withdrawal period is really tough. If you're concerned about your health, it's a good idea to see your doctor. That way you can feel more at ease and focus on moving through the withdrawal period. Stay close to SR, as you will need support during this time.
CT
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Join Date: Aug 2017
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Thank you CT 🙂
It's funny how it makes you have to think about yourself. I was feeling down as my friend is away I've only moved an hour away to a nice area and my dream home my last house was terrible yet I find myself missing it it's not like my friends are far and my family is closer I have a great husband I should be so greatful I think I thought moving would solve all my problems but now I'm having to face them! X
It's funny how it makes you have to think about yourself. I was feeling down as my friend is away I've only moved an hour away to a nice area and my dream home my last house was terrible yet I find myself missing it it's not like my friends are far and my family is closer I have a great husband I should be so greatful I think I thought moving would solve all my problems but now I'm having to face them! X
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Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
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Originally Posted by Sofedupofthis
Thank you CT 🙂
It's funny how it makes you have to think about yourself. I was feeling down as my friend is away I've only moved an hour away to a nice area and my dream home my last house was terrible yet I find myself missing it it's not like my friends are far and my family is closer I have a great husband I should be so greatful I think I thought moving would solve all my problems but now I'm having to face them! X
It's funny how it makes you have to think about yourself. I was feeling down as my friend is away I've only moved an hour away to a nice area and my dream home my last house was terrible yet I find myself missing it it's not like my friends are far and my family is closer I have a great husband I should be so greatful I think I thought moving would solve all my problems but now I'm having to face them! X
1) writing gratitude lists - of all the things you're thankful for in that day
2) helping someone else so we can stop all that self-centred thinking which actually just cause us unnecessary pain and depression. This might even just be watering a neighbours plants while you're doing your own. Popping round an elderly neighbours and asking if they could use any help or would like to come round for a cuppa and a chat. Or, if you have regular time slots, a bit of volunteering.
Is it time to start making some more local friends? Have you checked out the AA meetings in the area yet? Could be a good start.
BB
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Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 23
Good morning BB,
Hope your well! I would like to go to AA but there is no way I could do it here everyone is so nosey something I hate as I'm not used to it and I already feel like an alien here even tho some of my family lives here and it would get back to them at somepoint if I told them they really wouldn't believe or understand me I tried to tell my sister and she was like no you don't have a problem they are lovely people but these are not things they understand.
There are meetings in the next town. I will try and get to one next week just to see if it's for me.
I only have one person living next to me and they are on holiday only met them once.
I will try a list today. Thank you for being supportive BB this is a great forum!
Hope your well! I would like to go to AA but there is no way I could do it here everyone is so nosey something I hate as I'm not used to it and I already feel like an alien here even tho some of my family lives here and it would get back to them at somepoint if I told them they really wouldn't believe or understand me I tried to tell my sister and she was like no you don't have a problem they are lovely people but these are not things they understand.
There are meetings in the next town. I will try and get to one next week just to see if it's for me.
I only have one person living next to me and they are on holiday only met them once.
I will try a list today. Thank you for being supportive BB this is a great forum!
Originally Posted by Berrybean
Self-pity is our enemy in recovery. There are a couple of great ways of dealing with this:
1) writing gratitude lists - of all the things you're thankful for in that day
2) helping someone else so we can stop all that self-centred thinking which actually just cause us unnecessary pain and depression. This might even just be watering a neighbours plants while you're doing your own. Popping round an elderly neighbours and asking if they could use any help or would like to come round for a cuppa and a chat. Or, if you have regular time slots, a bit of volunteering.
Is it time to start making some more local friends? Have you checked out the AA meetings in the area yet? Could be a good start.
BB
1) writing gratitude lists - of all the things you're thankful for in that day
2) helping someone else so we can stop all that self-centred thinking which actually just cause us unnecessary pain and depression. This might even just be watering a neighbours plants while you're doing your own. Popping round an elderly neighbours and asking if they could use any help or would like to come round for a cuppa and a chat. Or, if you have regular time slots, a bit of volunteering.
Is it time to start making some more local friends? Have you checked out the AA meetings in the area yet? Could be a good start.
BB
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Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Originally Posted by Sofedupofthis
Good morning BB,
Hope your well! I would like to go to AA but there is no way I could do it here everyone is so nosey something I hate as I'm not used to it and I already feel like an alien here even tho some of my family lives here and it would get back to them at somepoint if I told them they really wouldn't believe or understand me I tried to tell my sister and she was like no you don't have a problem they are lovely people but these are not things they understand.
There are meetings in the next town. I will try and get to one next week just to see if it's for me.
I only have one person living next to me and they are on holiday only met them once.
I will try a list today. Thank you for being supportive BB this is a great forum!
Hope your well! I would like to go to AA but there is no way I could do it here everyone is so nosey something I hate as I'm not used to it and I already feel like an alien here even tho some of my family lives here and it would get back to them at somepoint if I told them they really wouldn't believe or understand me I tried to tell my sister and she was like no you don't have a problem they are lovely people but these are not things they understand.
There are meetings in the next town. I will try and get to one next week just to see if it's for me.
I only have one person living next to me and they are on holiday only met them once.
I will try a list today. Thank you for being supportive BB this is a great forum!
Anyway - good luck getting to the meetings in surrounding towns. I go to local ones as well as good ones elsewhere - often we share rides to out-of-town ones, and that's a good way to get to know people better.
BB
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Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 23
Such a good point about sober alcoholic and the shame. I don't think I would be as bothered if I hadn't just moved here lol but you are right I'm happy to fall in other people's bushes here drunk on wine and vodka than people talking about me going to a meeting? Such a true point that BB!
Originally Posted by Berrybean
I remember having the same concerns about being seen going to a meeting. The thing that amazes me now if just how many meeting s had been going for decades in my home town and I'd never even noticed a single one of them, let alone noticed who was arriving or leaving. But OHHH the shame at the thought of being spotted going to one of those places. Yet I didn't let the shame of being seen practically falling over in the street at times, and being know as a gal who liked her whisky and cider and could be relied on to be the drunkest one at any occasion ever deter me from my drinking. Strange isn't it. How the shame of being a sober alcoholic deters us from getting well, but the shame of being a drunk alcoholic tended not to stop us drinking.
Anyway - good luck getting to the meetings in surrounding towns. I go to local ones as well as good ones elsewhere - often we share rides to out-of-town ones, and that's a good way to get to know people better.
BB
Anyway - good luck getting to the meetings in surrounding towns. I go to local ones as well as good ones elsewhere - often we share rides to out-of-town ones, and that's a good way to get to know people better.
BB
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Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 136
Hey this is Toughroad1209
I jus joined today...im tired of this rollercoaster of a life I have. I have a beautiful family and many things to be proud of but I am a destructive drinker...I embarrass my wife numerous times and in past years I've started binges for days by myself!..I've put them through a nightmare and I don't want them to leave me after being 8 years in...I've tried AA and been in a rehab before but I always go back to my ways. I just got home from a binge 3 days ago and haven't really slept since I'm going through withdrawals now a days....this time around I really want to change my lifestyle. Tired of being miserable and hurting my family and me. Just tired of where Alcohol can take me!
I jus joined today...im tired of this rollercoaster of a life I have. I have a beautiful family and many things to be proud of but I am a destructive drinker...I embarrass my wife numerous times and in past years I've started binges for days by myself!..I've put them through a nightmare and I don't want them to leave me after being 8 years in...I've tried AA and been in a rehab before but I always go back to my ways. I just got home from a binge 3 days ago and haven't really slept since I'm going through withdrawals now a days....this time around I really want to change my lifestyle. Tired of being miserable and hurting my family and me. Just tired of where Alcohol can take me!
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