Cam30

Hi, I am new on this website, which I stumbled apon in search for answers. My father, has been a severe alcoholic for as far back as I can remember. I am now 18, and looking for a way to either help him, or say goodbye. Me and my sister have had to say our goodbyes to him quite a few times. I thought I've found him dead a few times, and turns out, he almost was. He as been detoxed multiple times, and even sent to rehab In California. Nothing helped however. The addiction just came back more severe than the time before. The police have had to come to his house to save him basically from dying, since his body could not function without alcohol, but he was too sick to get up off the couch. The police said how it was a miracle that he was even alive, and did not know how he was considering the level of alcohol in his blood. As far back as I can remember, he has done nothing but let me and my sister down every chance he gets. But I know that me and my sister are the only reason he is still alive right now. He has wanted nothing more than to end his life at some points, which he had told me. We now live in a different state, since he was forced to move far from me and my sister. I feel guilty for not wanting to love him anymore, and I don't know what to do. Please, if you have any advice, give it to me!!!! We never know when out last goodbye may be with our alcoholic family members.

Dee74

Hi Cam

you posted in our Chat admin forum so I moved you here to Newcomers forum so you'll get more response.

I'm sorry for what brings you here but you'll will find support for yourself here.

I don't know what to offer you but the thought that you sound as if you've done everything reasonable a loving family member could do.

It really is in your fathers hands what happens next. Many of us here have been in your Dad's shoes or worse.

I had a moment of clarity and changed my life for the better. I'll pray your Dad does too.

D

D122y

Cam,

I can relate a little to feelings of frustration and being out of control of your Dad's problem.

Especially because it is your father it is hard to say...stay away....it is out of your hands.

There is nothing more that can be done. The ball is always in the addicts court.

Since you are far away, i would pray for him, call him etc. Tell him you love him,

That is all.

Thanks.

PhoenixJ

Prayers for your dad. He is your dad. You cannot live your life- orbiting his addiction. You at some point will have to let go- or cause yourself much harm. Every family has it's breaking point. I can offer little advice- it sounds like he assumes you will always be there to rescue him. He is the only one who can get himself out of the hell he is in- I know that hell.
Empathy and support to you.

BlownOne

No advice here, I can only agree with the other posters. Prayers for your family.

heavencanwait

I am so sorry you and your sister are going through this. You are both in my thoughts and prayers. I agree with the other posters...there is really nothing more you can do. He needs to hit his rock bottom and his fate is in his hands.

Take care