Sober birthday :)
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Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 3,109
Sober birthday :)
So yesterday I turned 39 and it was my first sober birthday since I was 15 (except for 24 and 26 when I was pregnant). I didn't for one moment consider having some drinks to celebrate even though I was invited out and sort of encouraged to break my sobriety by my friends. No one actually said they thought I should drink but they wanted me to go out to party. No big deal though, they just don't really understand my level of commitment here. I didn't go out, I stayed home with my boys who had just come home from a vacation with their dad and we went out to dinner, it was low key but in a good way. A friend at work brought a cake in for me which I thought was really sweet. I passed the 5 month milestone this week too. I know it's still early but there's been a lot of change during these past 5 months. I will never go back to being that person. My day to day life hasn't changed that much, but my internal world has changed in every way that matters.
Today I'm taking my family and my sister and her family out on my boat for a nice afternoon of swimming and tubing and lunch and cake! Last summer it would have been a booze fueled weekend that I would have called fun but would leave me with a sense of shame deep down. Waking up every morning free of that shame is the best birthday gift I could ever give to myself.
Next year for my birthday I'd like a new birthday suit! This ones gotten kind of stretched out and wrinkled!
Today I'm taking my family and my sister and her family out on my boat for a nice afternoon of swimming and tubing and lunch and cake! Last summer it would have been a booze fueled weekend that I would have called fun but would leave me with a sense of shame deep down. Waking up every morning free of that shame is the best birthday gift I could ever give to myself.
Next year for my birthday I'd like a new birthday suit! This ones gotten kind of stretched out and wrinkled!
::
(I could use one myself 
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Zen, that's SO great! Happy belated. I turned 40 last Aug and it was my first sober birthday in a long time and I am excited to have my second-in-a-row sober birthday this week! You definitely deserve that bathing suit 
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Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 3,109
Thanks everybody!
I'm back from boating and I am sunned out! It was just so lovely to be out with my family, my children, and be sober. I stayed the night on the water with my kids and we talked late into the evening about all kinds of things, it was really great. I'm so glad that they don't have to be around drunk me anymore, and so are they, I can tell. I remember being a kid and my mom getting drunk all the time, it would make me so anxious and embarrassed. I really hope that I'm able to break the family legacy here and that my boys don't go down the same path I did. I have a lot of guilt and worry over what I've done as a mother, I just hope that I can make it up to them and that they'll grow into responsible, decent, good men despite me, which they seem to be doing. I can't get around the fact that I knew better and I kept drinking anyway.
Anyway, it was a lovely weekend and I'm sober today and I'm going to stay that way.
Thanks again guys and gals for the well wishes and for your support!
I'm back from boating and I am sunned out! It was just so lovely to be out with my family, my children, and be sober. I stayed the night on the water with my kids and we talked late into the evening about all kinds of things, it was really great. I'm so glad that they don't have to be around drunk me anymore, and so are they, I can tell. I remember being a kid and my mom getting drunk all the time, it would make me so anxious and embarrassed. I really hope that I'm able to break the family legacy here and that my boys don't go down the same path I did. I have a lot of guilt and worry over what I've done as a mother, I just hope that I can make it up to them and that they'll grow into responsible, decent, good men despite me, which they seem to be doing. I can't get around the fact that I knew better and I kept drinking anyway.
Anyway, it was a lovely weekend and I'm sober today and I'm going to stay that way.
Thanks again guys and gals for the well wishes and for your support!
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