Raistlin999

I am new here but wanted to say hi. I am proud of all of you. I am on day 11 of getting off of methadone. I was in the military and served 3 tours in Afghanistan and 3 weeks before coming back stateside i was hurt bad. Enough said about that. I have been on 160mgs of methadone for 7 yrs. Last march my wife was diagnosed with a very rare form of cancer. Several surgeries and months of chemo, she was good. I decided to start to taper off so i can give her a better life. 12 days ago they found 3 new tumors. Only 10% survival chance. So the next day i threw the methadone in the trash and didnt look back. I jumped at 30mgs so it is hard but possible. I want what ever time i have with my wife to be the best possible for us. I have read everybody's experiences and their tortures and triumphs here and just wanted to say that i have seen bravery and courage in my life and all of you deserve to be in the same group of people that i served and bled with. You should all be proud of yourselves, i am. You all are amoung the bravest people i have seen. Good luck and God bless all of you.

Berrybean

Welcome on board.

So sorry to hear about your wife's illness. Prayers going out for both of you tonight.

Wishing you all the best for your recovery. BB

Bobbieka

Raistlin999,

Welcome to SR. This place truly saved me from myself. Thank you for your service. I am so sorry about your wife. You will both be in my prayers.
Great job on getting clean for her. That is bravery.

PhoenixJ

R- my thoughts and support to you and your wife. Please do not forget to look after yourself in this very difficult time. Eat, sleep, fluids- talking stuff through.
You are both brave people. PJ

Elke516

Welcome to SR Raistlin999. Congrats on 11 days.

Like Berrybean and Bobbieka, you and your wife w.ill be in my prayers.

Nowsthetime

Thank YOU!!! For everything you have done for us.

Welcome to the family.

Use this place as much as you need. It has really helped me by educating me about addiction and different tools on how to deal with it. My life is better because I quit, no doubt 100%.

We are here to support you.

Hope to see you around.

Raistlin999

Thank you all for your prayers and support. I have a good regiment of vitamins, supplements, protien shakes, amino acids and a good appetite. Of course i can't forget the Imodium. My pain management dr gave me a small script for benzos to help through the hard days, short term of course. I draw my strength from my love for my wife and the fact that all of you are either going through the same type of battle or have won your fight. Thank you all again.

hodor

That is an inspiring story Raistlin. My father had cancer with a very low survival rate and ultimately died from it. I still have sad memories of not being entirely present during his illness, I was in a ramping up phase of my alcoholism and total denial and excessive drinking were my ways of coping.

I wish at the time that I had the strength to focus on him and my family rather than myself and it is something I'm not proud of.

I am now able to be proud - almost ten years on - that I've been given the gift of recovery and that I can be present, for my family and others in my life. I no longer feel that shame when I visit his grave and I can hold my head high.

You absolutely make me proud mate. Do reach out and get help where you need, you don't need to battle the addiction alone. Strength in numbers. I wish you all the best in your recovery.

(note - if anyone told me a year ago that I'd be crying while writing a reply on a recovery forum I'd have laughed at you )

Hevyn

It's great to have you with us, Raistlin. Thank you for serving.

I'll add my prayers to those already going up for your wife. I hope being here to talk things over will help. We all care about you.

Anna

I'm so very sorry for your wife's illness. I hope you continue to post here. There is a lot of support.

Raistlin999

Ty hodor. You should be proud of yourself. Your father knew you loved him and I'm sure that on some level he knew what you where going through and felt no ill will to you but held great love for you in his heart. He would be and is very proud of you. If combat taught me anything is that crap happens and you do the best you can at the time. Our loved ones will forgive, even if it sometimes takes awhile. I will still have problems, i have prosthetics and they really hurt to wear. I will have to learn to deal with that when this is over. Least of my concern though, i will go without them and crawl before i ever go back on any pain med. Ty again for your kind words.

Raistlin999

Thank you to everyone for your support. This xoes really help. My wife is actually a therapist so i believe strongly in participating in support groups. You all are great. I already feel a bond with you all. Thats is wht makes us successful.