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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 1
New on this forum
Happy new year to all! Please let me introduce myself. I am a 56th year old divorced man. I have been drinking wine all my life. This past two years I have been able to drink only during the week-end (Friday, Saturday and Sunday) and during the vacation. I have never increased my consumption and I know for sure that I won't increase it. I now drink a little less that a bottle 3 times a week. I would like to try to reach a new level and quit. I feel really well when I do not drink during the week. I never drink during the day. My most difficult time is before having diner when I want to relax with a few glasses of wine. I would like to stop thinking about "my drinking days" and "my no drinking days"! I am in a good shape, work out several times a week and run 4-5 times a week. I am also very lonely, which could be one of the reasons I need to drink. I am so impressed when some of you write in this forum "the most sober time I've ever had was 3 years or 6 months or 1 year!" I even cannot do a full month and four days in a row is a struggle! Maybe my approach of the problem is inadequate? Any way, my feeling are a little vague, I only wanted to introduce myself and congratulate you for your achievement.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Welcome.
You know, after years of trying to moderate, it was actually much easier to concede defeat and quit that inner battle of wills between my AV and my conscience. The longer the time was between my last drink and the present time, the quieter the voice became. It is never completely silent, and will occasionally pipe unexpectedly even at 2.5 years sober, esp if I slack up on my program of recovery or self-care. A lot of recovery for me has been about growing up and taking responsibility for my actions and looking after myself by doing what I NEED to do so I will be calm and content rather than what I WANT to do to get instant gratification.
I've found this forum and the fellowship of AA to be a massive help. Meeting others (esp other ladies, for me) who understand how I think and feel, who I can be honest with, has been amazing. I'd always kept a definite distance from others before. I could be friendly, even flirtatious, but I never really opened up or let anyone know the real me. That led to real loneliness, even though I probably seemed on the surface to be outgoing and social. My inner feelings and personality were at odds with the facade I built up. Through the AA 12-step program I've been able to deconstruct my facade, and feel comfortable with myself. It's been pretty life-changing. Funny, because at the end of my drinking what I most feared was that quitting booze would destroy my way of life, and how others perceived me. All my fears were realised, and it's the best thing that ever could have happened to me.
Wishing you all the best for your sobriety and recovery. BB
You know, after years of trying to moderate, it was actually much easier to concede defeat and quit that inner battle of wills between my AV and my conscience. The longer the time was between my last drink and the present time, the quieter the voice became. It is never completely silent, and will occasionally pipe unexpectedly even at 2.5 years sober, esp if I slack up on my program of recovery or self-care. A lot of recovery for me has been about growing up and taking responsibility for my actions and looking after myself by doing what I NEED to do so I will be calm and content rather than what I WANT to do to get instant gratification.
I've found this forum and the fellowship of AA to be a massive help. Meeting others (esp other ladies, for me) who understand how I think and feel, who I can be honest with, has been amazing. I'd always kept a definite distance from others before. I could be friendly, even flirtatious, but I never really opened up or let anyone know the real me. That led to real loneliness, even though I probably seemed on the surface to be outgoing and social. My inner feelings and personality were at odds with the facade I built up. Through the AA 12-step program I've been able to deconstruct my facade, and feel comfortable with myself. It's been pretty life-changing. Funny, because at the end of my drinking what I most feared was that quitting booze would destroy my way of life, and how others perceived me. All my fears were realised, and it's the best thing that ever could have happened to me.
Wishing you all the best for your sobriety and recovery. BB
Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: DFW area, Texas
Posts: 521
Welcome! Sounds like your mind is in the right place to quit for good and you've found a good place to be on that journey!
After having about a year sobriety in 2015, I thought that some drinking would be ok...all things in moderation right? For me that didn't pan out. I was drinking about the same as you are now up until a few months ago and high functioning, but starting to get miserable with the cumulative mental issues that alcohol brings for me.
You've got this!
After having about a year sobriety in 2015, I thought that some drinking would be ok...all things in moderation right? For me that didn't pan out. I was drinking about the same as you are now up until a few months ago and high functioning, but starting to get miserable with the cumulative mental issues that alcohol brings for me.
You've got this!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
Welcome serenity - for years I could not go beyond 3 days no drinking...ina few months I'll be sober a decade.
The difference for me was accepting my relationship with alcohol was toxic and that if I wanted change and good thing, I needed to stop drinking completely, for good.
I know you'll find a lot of support here
D
The difference for me was accepting my relationship with alcohol was toxic and that if I wanted change and good thing, I needed to stop drinking completely, for good.
I know you'll find a lot of support here
D
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 8,336
Welcome and as other have said, I found it harder to moderate, than quit drinking. I'm 59, so a little older than you.....I don't miss the calories and sugar I consumed with wine.
Again, welcome, read and post
Again, welcome, read and post
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