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Old 11-17-2016, 12:07 AM
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Question New to this lovely forum

Hello hello,

As stated in the title I am new to this forum. I'm hoping to begin recovery as after a serious of horrible events and telling myself "that I'll just cut back" or if I don't drink everyday it's going to be okay. But now, when I do drink, I have no self control and black out and hurt the people I care about. I've left my pet snake out and had to find him, I've been kicked out of a friend's house for being out of control, obnoxious, and borderline violent.

At the age of 22, no one wants to accept that they are an alcoholic. We tell ourselves "this is fun" "everyone my age is doing it" but it's not the case, not when I'm drinking alone and hiding my drinking because I can't trust myself in public. I drink 1-3 bottles of wine most nights.

I just don't want to go down this path, I want to see life through clear eyes. Not the blood red ones that I have to use eye drops to hide every morning.

Does anyone have any advice on how to begin the road to recovery?
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Old 11-17-2016, 12:15 AM
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Originally Posted by Bats View Post

But now, when I do drink, I have no self control and black out and hurt the people I care about.
That was one of the main reasons that I stopped drinking.
I started to have black outs and lost all self control.
I did some terrible things.

Now that I have been sober for a while
I work on my self control and understand how important it is.

Self Control is one of the Fruits Of The Spirit.

Good luck,
M-bob
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Old 11-17-2016, 12:44 AM
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Hi and welcome bats

Joining SR is already a great start. Read around, see what others are doing, find a way to stay sober that makes sense to you.

Check out our Class of November thread too It's for everyone quitting this month, and all you need to do to join is post

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rt-2-a-17.html

D
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Old 11-17-2016, 12:55 AM
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Thanks D,

I went ahead and posted in the forum you linked. I'm still not a that sure how all of this works but, I'm going to do my best to figure it out lol
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Old 11-17-2016, 01:05 AM
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If you have any questions just ask - we're all very helpful Bats
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Old 11-17-2016, 02:05 AM
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Hi Bats,

First of all, I love your username (I think of Joker saying "Bats" to Batman in the PS game!) and wanted to extend some support to you. I'm glad you're here.

I'm 28 years old and wish I'd stopped drinking sooner but hey, I wasn't ready and **** happens. Nevertheless, one thing that kept me drinking was the feeling that I'm in my 20s and everyone else is having fun and drinking, so I should too and that it wasn't fair that I was different. Thing is, alcohol caused havoc on my life. I've absolutely flushed so many career opportunities down the toilet, messed up my finances and relationships, most importantly the relationship with myself.

You're in a great jumping off position to make a big change and this is something to be proud of that you are here and reaching out for help.

I can only tell you what I do and hope that some of it helps you. I am doing 90 AA meetings in 90 days, I text or talk to a friend in recovery every day (even just a "hi, how was your day?" just helps to stop me isolating) and I've been reading a lot about sobriety as well as keeping myself busy. I'm job hunting but spend my time at a meeting, taking up a hobby that fell by the wayside and doing things I always meant to do but never got round to because I was wasted.

I first went to AA 3 years ago and wasn't into it, but I was at a similar point to you a little while ago - at the bottom and scared of the next thing I'd lose. I was terrified that I'd screw up my marriage so bad that I'd lose my husband and he's my best friend, and I was scared that the next time I got drunk I'd succeed in killing myself - I couldn't take that risk and that feeling of hopelessness has helped keep me sober.

I'd recommend making a plan for recovery. There's lots of other options alternative to AA, but support is key and always reach out if you need help :-)
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Old 11-17-2016, 10:14 AM
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I absolutely relate to everything you said about not being ready to quit and not waking to be different.

One of my friends put it fairly well when he quit drinking, he said "I didn't want to quit drinking, I just didn't want to be an alcoholic. But after months and one casual drink at a bar turning in to a 2 week binge I realized that just wasn't possible"
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Old 11-17-2016, 10:17 AM
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Hi, Bats! Great avatar, Lip from Shameless. Good decision quitting alcohol, sounds like it's not doing you any favors.
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Old 11-17-2016, 10:28 AM
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Thanks!

Lip is a very relatable character for me lmfao. And no, it most certainly is not unfortunately.
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Old 11-17-2016, 10:42 AM
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I can relate right down to even leaving my pet snake out ... I'm back again and I have to do it this time... I'm not able to drink like a normal person... I want to be able to but I've proven time and time again... Now I feel weak.... My muscles hurt I'm no even walk in to the lcbo anymore so I get a cabbie to bring me smokes and vodka... I'm going to be 31 on the 26th of this month.... I want to be a healthy young woman.... That's what I want for my birthday... Rebirth from this isolated drunken dipressing anxiety crippling life I'm leading... I have a loving boyfriend and family and I need to stop drinking because I'm lonely because if I wasn't drunk I'd be socializing more... Eating properly... Not feeling like a corps... The problem is I'm a very friendly drunk so my friends stay with me in my denial..... I've talked to my boyfriend hundreds of times about quitting then I try and tapper off... Only to bindge drink when I can't be with him.... Hiding vodka bottles everywhere... Losing my vodka wile drinking it my completion is even suffering... I had an anxiety attack at work on Monday an another one in a bar on Tuesday... I'm feeling shaky at the moment cause I've been drinking everyday for as long as I can remember now.... Maybe 5 years.... I have to stop!!
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Old 11-17-2016, 10:53 AM
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Welcome Bats - I would recommend getting a plan together to help you stay on track. Stay around here and post often. There are plenty of people (including myself) that have been in your shoes willing to help out.
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Old 11-17-2016, 11:09 AM
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Hi and Welcome Bats, I am so glad you are here. You are quite young and saving yourself much heartache by deciding to pursue sobriety now.

I have an acquaintance who also quit very young... well they are no longer young... and very likely because of making the same wise decision
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Old 11-17-2016, 11:17 AM
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Welcome, Bats!

It seems you've gotten lots of good advice, so I hope you keep reading and posting.
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Old 11-17-2016, 12:15 PM
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Welcome, Bats!!

I second the above comments about good going on facing alcoholism at your age. Because I was intelligent, raised in a wealthy family, a standout athlete and scholar, involved in everything in college and then successful in a career....I got away with alcoholic behavior for a long time, until it was full fledged addiction in my 30s. Looking back, I see all the cracks.

I am a dedicated AA-er on the eve of nine months sober - at 40 - and I think the suggestion of 90 in 90 is a great one. In Orlando, I am certain if you Google "AA meetings" you will find a lot of options. And you will find people your age, along with those of us who found the solution later in life.

There are also other programs out there (many of our Brit friends will tell you about success with SMART etc) and all of us who are sober are likely to agree that the key thing is making and following a plan. AA calls itself a "program of action" and IME, working it daily has led to a better life than I ever imagined, and one that is superior to even my best drinking times (and certainly than the darkest ones that came eventually!).

Good luck to you. Hope to see you around!
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Old 11-17-2016, 12:49 PM
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It is very admirable that you recognize this at a young age, it will serve you well going forward. You start just like you've started, get involved with a sober community, listen to others, resist urges, take action (very important) and wait for the benefits to begin. It will happen. Welcome to SR.
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