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Thinking about how good a beer would be

Old 11-05-2016, 02:46 PM
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Thinking about how good a beer would be

So I'm sitting here at my daughter's soccer game, sober for 34 days now. Getting hungry and thinking of that place we always go after--- the place with good wings and lots of craft beer. Arrrgh! I wish I could just be normal! I mean there are plenty of times I'd go and only have 2 or 3. Then of course there were those times where I'd stop at the grocery store on the way hope to continue the buzz, which then turned into a blackout or doing something embarrassing (i.e.: thinking it would be fun to go party with the neighbors then making a total fool of myself and wanting to hide my face for the past month)!
I have been lucky and not had too many cravings the past 34 days, but I'm feeling it. Must keep the shame close. I'm NOT going to drink today... But really wanting wings & BEER! I'll opt for Diet Cherry Coke.
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Old 11-05-2016, 03:11 PM
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Keep playing the tape forward if those romanticising thoughts of a drink pop into your head. Think HALT. If you have any of those triggers going on right now, do what you can to nip them in the bud. Hungry-Angry-Lonely-Tired. .. hungry? Get some food as a matter or urgency. Angry or irritable, talk to us about it and work through those feelings. Lonely, talk to us, or call, someone who loves you for a chat. Tired? Get said daughter asap and grab some zzzzzs or at least relax.

Don't listen to your AV whatever you do. A drink won't stay 'a' drink for long. You chose sobriety and registered here for a reason (probably reasonS). Think of the ways that alcohol has been detrimental to your life and happiness. List them on this thread if needs be.

And well done for posting.
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Old 11-05-2016, 03:23 PM
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I second Berrybean "
Kudos for posting here about it and sticking to your guns. That's awesome! The more cravings you get past sober, the easier it'll be.

Well done!
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Old 11-05-2016, 03:25 PM
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Bourbon was my doc, but what I missed the most is beer. Hang in there Oct2016. You are not alone. Congratulations on 34 days. ��
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Old 11-05-2016, 03:43 PM
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I cant control what thoughts come into my melon, but I don't have to let my thoughts control my actions.
and theres times my thoughts are lies.
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Old 11-05-2016, 03:49 PM
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Beer was my go-to drink. When thoughts pop in my head about how nice a beer (or 12 or more) sounds, I have to make a conscious effort to remove that thought and focus my mind elsewhere. If I let myself romanticize about it, I'd be going downhill quickly. I understand though... it's football season... I have weekends off... and back in the old days I'd be at a bar drinking and watching the games. I've changed things around this time though.
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Old 11-05-2016, 03:54 PM
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Hi Oct

I think thoughts like that are pretty normal for a while. Liker Tomsteve suggested, our recovery is not based on those thoughts it's based on what we do with them

What helped me to get through them was to accept that it was that first drink that did me in, not the last - there wasn't that TV commercial happy joking shiny life waiting for me if I drank again.

I can remember now where that one beer takes me and I accept now that that will never change.

It's not always going to feel like a loss I love my sober life and I love who I am. Qutting drinking feels like a gift now, not a loss.

I still love wings too

good for you for getting through

D
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Old 11-05-2016, 03:58 PM
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I'm with Maudcat, it was bourbon for me.. when I get those thoughts I try to tell myself the only thing I can control is my reaction to them. Dunno if that is real smart but it seems to help me.
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Old 11-05-2016, 04:14 PM
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When you've had occasions of drinking sensibly as well as times when you've gone overboard, I think it's like playing Russian roulette to choose to drink again. Which outcome will it be? Moderate or shameful drunk? Wake up feeling ok or feeling as though you're in a horror movie? End up having 1 or 2 or will it be 10, 11, 12?
It's like gambling-with your life, your self respect. Not worth the risk.
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Old 11-05-2016, 04:22 PM
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Hi Oct.

I felt that way for the first couple months. I was a bit resentful, but I knew trying to hold it down to 'one or two' was futile. There was never a time when it was safe to take a chance - not for me. These temptations are normal - after all, we lived the drinking life for a long time. They will fade as you get some sober time behind you. I can't believe it - but I rarely think of drinking these days. Never thought there'd come a time it wouldn't be on my mind.
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Old 11-05-2016, 04:30 PM
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hey, good job today.
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Old 11-05-2016, 05:07 PM
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Originally Posted by teaorcoffee View Post
hey, good job today.
I love it.... that just made my day in so many ways....
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Old 11-05-2016, 05:11 PM
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Way to fight the AV! It will get easier, I guarantee.
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Old 11-05-2016, 06:46 PM
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I started making my own wings at home and constantly am looking at ways to make em hotter and better. Takes your mind off the beer part. Plus if there hot enough all you want to drink with em is milk.
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Old 11-05-2016, 07:55 PM
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Thanks so much to all of you for the support! I'm back home and safe to say tomorrow will be 35 days sober! A bunch of us ended up going to a Mexican restaurant after soccer. Some ordered margaritas (which actually make me sick to think of due to some pretty wretched hangovers in the past). I had Diet Coke with a lime and ate too many chips & salsa. "Berrybean" mentioned HALT. I was definitely the H (hungry) and by the time I got some food in me my cravings for beer was gone. Also, I seated my self kind of in between the parents and the kids end of the table which I feel made it easier.
Thanks again for the support and advice!
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Old 11-05-2016, 08:32 PM
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Well done Oct2016.

It wasn't the same outcome for me (last week) and ONE beer turned into a nightmare. The sunny day, the umbrellas in the beer garden looked all so *normal* and inviting, but not for me.

I could have sat and relaxed under an umbrella with a lemon, lime and soda. Wish I had.
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Old 11-05-2016, 08:53 PM
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The last time I thought how good it would be to have a glass of wine I ended up face-planted into the side of a sofa.! I won't be fooled again!
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Old 11-05-2016, 10:22 PM
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Hey Oct2016.

You and I sound a lot alike. I laughed about drinking a "couple" and then heading over to a neighbor's house for a "couple" more. Then of course making a fool of myself and lurking around for a while with my tail between my legs. I spent the day watching football and can't tell you how many times I thought about drinking a "couple" of beers. I went for the water each time. The Topo Chico is out in the beer fridge. Each time I went out there to get some water I mentally mocked the beer. Lol. "Not this time you son-of-a-gun".

And then I made some hot wings. And then I called a couple of friends and my father in-law to say hello. That was something I wouldn't have been able to do if I had talked myself into thinking it was okay to have a "couple".

So good on you. You ain't alone. And thanks for posting because you made me feel not so alone too. Keep up the good work. People keep telling me it pays off.
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Old 11-06-2016, 01:40 AM
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Originally Posted by Oct2016 View Post
Thanks so much to all of you for the support! I'm back home and safe to say tomorrow will be 35 days sober! A bunch of us ended up going to a Mexican restaurant after soccer. Some ordered margaritas (which actually make me sick to think of due to some pretty wretched hangovers in the past). I had Diet Coke with a lime and ate too many chips & salsa. "Berrybean" mentioned HALT. I was definitely the H (hungry) and by the time I got some food in me my cravings for beer was gone. Also, I seated my self kind of in between the parents and the kids end of the table which I feel made it easier.
Thanks again for the support and advice!
Sobriety is such a learning curve for all of us.... so, what can you learn from yesterday to take forward (as part of your sobriety plan) to make staying sober more comfortable and sustainable in the long term? Maybe a protein sandwich before going out and snacks in your bag.

I know it may sound greedy but I always try to eat before going out (even if to a restaurant because sometimes the wait time can be painful if I'm hungry, and of course, in a restaurant there is always lots of alcohol and drinking so I can't afford any wobbles of my resolve in there). I also keep some sweet cereal bars in my bag. The reason I say sweet cereal bars is that the refined sugars give me a pretty much instant hit, but the cereal is slower release energy, so I don't end up with the emotional crush of a sugar low after the sugar hit. People always said about eating candy to stave off cravings, but the highs and lows of the sugar high and crash were counterproductive for me. We're all different though, so whatever works for you.

Well done for ignoring you AV, and not Velcroing yourself to that passing thought of alcohol for to long.

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Old 11-06-2016, 06:37 AM
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There must be something with Beer and that month long sobriety period. I am 44 days sober and last weekend I had the exact same cravings, the first real bad one since I quit drinking. This weekend has been a lot better with no urge to drink and I am hoping that it was a one off although deep down I fear the cravings will return. Last weekend I looked back at some of the texts I sent to the people I really care about who I told of my problems with alcohol and drew great strength from realising that I just can't return to how I used to be. As Oct 16 and others have said and I am exactly the same one would just lead to one more and oblivion.

Keep strong everyone.
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