Findec

I just hit the 72 hour mark. 3 complete days. The last time I drank was a very small amount as well. I sipped 2 1/2 pints over 4 hours. Which ended at this time Saturday night. 3 whole days now gone by with not a drop of alcohol. The nights get me the worse I dont understand why? Probably because of habit. I am now paranoid reading all articles etc about this is the stage DT's set in. I just pray this doesnt happen. I am currently experiencing slight jitters, face feels slightly warm, restless of course., and slight nausea but I powerful hunger to eat. Very odd. Well here is to making it thru this night they are always the worst.

Findec

85 hours and change sober now. Appetite has came on like a beast and I am consuming enormous amounts of food. I slept for 4 hours last night!!! OMG it was sleep as well. Insane dreams but it was sleep! I seldom dream at night usually passing out and just awakening. I have major stress headache from anxiety. Also, I am crying for very little reason. I am not the crying type. I feel flooded with emotions. I suppose its a release from numbing myself with alcohol for so long. I want this day and night to be over. 10 hours and 30 mins I will have made it to 4 complete days. I am so exhausted still. Such a fog I am in but there are momentarily glimpses of clarity. Its hard to describe. I WILL make it thru this, and I will be a success story. I swear there are two people inside me. One that wants to just give up drink, smoke weed, do whatever drug and "enjoy" life. Enjoy life right. I know that is foolish thing to say. The other is this person who wants to live life to the fullest. I want to study I want to become even more proficient at my work. I want to become even more spiritual. I want a meaningful relationship with God, a woman, my family. I know which is best for me. The temptation is insane tho for the prior. I will get thru this. This forum has made me realize I do in fact need a plan. Everyone no matter how strong needs help. A guideline. Because when these withdrawls fade and I become somewhat "normal" perse. I NEVER want to travel this path again. I choose another direction.

dwtbd

Great job getting through the first few days and keeping your resolve! It gets better, it may not seem like it comes fast enough, but it does get better, promise.
What really helped me was finding SR and then learning about RR and AVRT , there are great threads on these ideas here on SR in the Secular Connections forum. Check them out and see what you think especially concerning the feeling of two minds in one head, wish you well and hope to see you around

Dee74

I'm glad things are improving findec.

With regards to social things, don;t fall into the trap of thinking your only two options are decadent parties or sitting alone at home.

There's a lot of good fun things to do in the world that don't need to involve alcohol or drinking.

Use your imagination

D

least

Welcome! I hope our support can help you stay sober for good. It's worth it.

Findec

Yeah youre so right. It's just so hard to see right now but I know youre right. I need this week to myself. Let me rephrase that. (Because I have spent many nights alone but under the influence) I need this week to myself being sober. I am just not very strong at the moment. I remember things I loved to do when I was sober. I plan on revisiting some of those activities in a week. I need rest I feel at the moment. 2 hours and 45 mins and I will be at the 96 hour mark. Then 3 more days and I plan on starting back to those activities. Everyone on here is so kind and supporting. You guys are very special people.

Findec

Support from here has been amazing. I appreciate you all. I cant always see myself posting here everyday eventually, but I can see myself always coming back and giving my updates. This is a safe place like a second home. It's very comforting.

Findec

The 96 hour mark has come. 4 complete days. Seems like a month honestly. I talked with one of my best friends tonight. They are willing to start exercising with me when I am ready. Its one of the few friends I can honestly count on. However like many dont quite understand my situation as well as the beautiful people here do. However, I am so ready to get back in shape. Start physically and work my way emotionally and spiritually. As for my withdraws this night. Tired but still awake. Mind still racing, but a little bit more calmer then usual. Anxiety has seemingly decreased dramatically. Jitters for now have faded. Things still seem really loud however. My aches seem to be slowly going away along with my exhaustion. I am still very fatigued but can manage to pull myself thru more then just my job. I so cant wait to see that 1 week sober day. It means so much too me. It's my everything at this moment. I know that is selfish, but I ask myself. If I cannot help myself then how can I help others? As bad as it sounds I feel I need to be selfish. At least for the time being. Maybe one day I can be like many of the posters here and offer guidance and instill faith in the fact we can overcome this. Dee, least, Oonna, soberbike.. I could go on about everyone. You all know who you are. But its one day at a time, right guys? Right now for me is hours I understand this and I accept it. I know it will become days, weeks, years. Oh what a wonderful thought. Its been 3 years sober for me. I can't wait to say those words. Anyway, here is the wretched night. But a night I WILL get thru.

Dee74

Don;t wish yourself too far ahead - the journey really is the gift here...I learned (and grew) so much day by day...you will too, findec

D

CajunPrincess

Welcome Findec! Glad you're here.
My drinking pattern was VERY similar to yours in lots of ways, and I definitely understand nighttime being SO difficult. It became my "ritual" every night after work. I'm on day 9 now and finally feel like my body/mind is starting to get a little used to not having to drink every time I get home.
Anyways, I wish you the best. And like someone else said... You should join the August group. It's not too late!

dwtbd

As to your 'time' goals , well time takes the time it takes, three years Will happen and then four ect. We live only Now and then add them up, right Now you are doing great , it's a hard fight right now but it gets better.
As to the inspiration and insightful part, I'd say you being here sharing is meeting that in spades, you got this

dwtbd

and I do remember in the first week that my auditory nerves were all haywire, I was constantly checking in other rooms because I thought I was hearing someone, didn't really help with the overall anxiety, but like I may have mentioned it gets better , definitely not fun when it is happening but it subsides

Findec

8 mins away and it will be 5 complete days. As soon as work was over today. I immediately crashed and slept for 6 hours!!!!!! I am still exhausted and I dont care lol. I feel so sleepy as I am typing this. I think I will try and sleep another 5 hours before work. I know thats alot of sleep but I am just so happy I can sleep now. Best wishes to all!!! Going to catch some Z's hopefully!

Findec

Day 8 is here, and will be gone in 7 hours. Not a bad day. Feel kinda lost but I expected these emotions. Alot of emotions are present to be honest. A complete rollercoaster, but thats ok. Just taking every moment as it is. My syptoms are I feel bloated. Slight Nausea especially after eating. Anxiety still an issue but not as extreme. This is certainly not easy one bit. However, I feel more secure with each passing minute. I would say better but right now emotions are a whirlwind so definitely some minutes better then others. That being said the brain "fog" each minute is slowly dissapating. So that makes me feel more like myself, or the redefinition of. Either way its a path I have chosen to walk and I will make the best of it. The Sober Path. Sure beats feeling like hell when I wake in the morning puking bile, and wishing I was dead at times. Here's to day 8 and an early welcome to day 9.

Dee74

Congrats on day 8 findec

D

sugarbear1

Keep moving forward!!!!

dwtbd

Keep truckin

Belier

Well done Findec! it really does get so much better, emotionally, spiritually and physically. I was you back in April, and I so pleased I pushed on, life is on the upwards!

kittycat3

Keep going!!! Congrats!

Mklove

Findec, seems quite a lot to take on, maybe start with choosing 1 or 2 people who aren't part of your party group to reconnect or connect with? It's such a positive thing that your work is well recognized and you are productive, that's a great thing, congratulations on your time so far. My husband still drinks so wine is always here, I just picture my already compromised liver and so far not tempted.