"Almost 4 month itch"...

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06-07-2016, 05:42 PM

# 21 (permalink)

ICanDoBetter

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Join Date: Jan 2015

Location: Northeast US

Posts: 773

Thanks all.

I feel whiny lately , and I hate that. I am ready to get back to feeling like me - but I'm not sure what that even means at this point. Most of the time I'm a positive person - that's just become a struggle right now.

To the point of Dee's quote - the journey certainly isn't graceful right now

Today my mental dialogue included "maybe I need a relapse to really get this all to sink in"

Seriously - this AV is a nasty beast!

The last several days by mid afternoon thoughts of drinking when the day is done have kept back in, and I didn't have those since about two weeks in.

I'm sipping coffee - haven't had a drink. But I'm really sick of this darned AV.

06-07-2016, 06:02 PM

# 22 (permalink)

LadyBlue0527

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Join Date: Jun 2013

Location: Maine

Posts: 3,649

ICDB you are doing so great. Some people deal with just trying to stay sober. You've had events taken from you due to having to deal with some health issues. It makes sense that you're having a tough time right now and you're doing the right thing by coming here and by refusing to drink.

Has anyone told you how amazing you are lately? Because I am right now.

06-07-2016, 06:30 PM

# 23 (permalink)

grizzlybearblue

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Join Date: Oct 2015

Posts: 506

Right around the four month mark was really hard for me too. I remember two days before I hit four months, I was craving bad. I was fighting myself hard and saying don't blow it! At that time, I told myself to push it out, make it to six months, see how I feel, and re-evaluate. That whole week was hard, but I'm so glad I do not give in. I know exactly how you are feeling right now. I had the exact same thoughts, and at the time, I was starting to think my mental obsession was never going to end. But it passed, and feeling good about being sober lasts a lot longer than the buzz I get from booze. Dee told me at the time to ride it out. It will pass. I am SO glad I did not give in!! You can do this!! Hang tough. Ride it out : )

06-08-2016, 05:23 AM

# 24 (permalink)

ICanDoBetter

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Thread Starter

Join Date: Jan 2015

Location: Northeast US

Posts: 773

Quote:

Originally Posted by strategery

I've noticed a lot of people tend to fall off around the 3-5 month mark. Some really struggle to regain their footing with sobriety once they relapse. Every person I've talked to talks about how it wasn't worth it, so those are important words to heed IMHO. I know what you're saying and can completely relate since I had the itch too. 6 months seemed so far off and a year even moreso. Between PMing friends for support, keeping up my recovery efforts, and focusing on how much life had improved with sobriety, it got me through . Sobriety has gotten even better with time and I now have over 1.5 years sober. Keep on hanging in there.

If you need accountability, why not join us on the 24 hour thread? It'd be great to have you there!

wanted to also share my accountability thread that I started on day 30 and post to every morning...
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post5842214

06-08-2016, 07:15 AM

# 25 (permalink)

chrcarlson

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Join Date: Dec 2015

Location: Dallas Texas

Posts: 579

I can relate. Many days I feel in the doldrums. My life is better is some ways but it's not been a magic carpet ride. It was unrealistic for me to think it would be but that hasn't stopped me. Today I'm not hungover and have no problems created by alcohol in the last 182 days. I'm not going to drink today-we will see what tomorrow brings.

06-08-2016, 07:22 AM

# 26 (permalink)

chrcarlson

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Join Date: Dec 2015

Location: Dallas Texas

Posts: 579

ICanDoBetter-the thoughts come and go but are not nearly the cravings I had early on. I suppose that's on thing keeping me sober. I have those damn cravings, a beer or two and I'm sure they will be back.