From addict to genuinely comfortable.. when?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 74
From addict to genuinely comfortable.. when?
When can I expect to feel like a breath of fresh air? 30 days no way for me. Is it any "better" at 60 days or still a struggle? 90 days? 6 months? 6 years? When does the feeling of a real 'normal' barely start to appear, a real psychological 'normal'? Just a taste of it, a glimpse of encouragement to keep me going, anything. I really truly tried and still didn't get to see it.
I relapsed twice. First time, day 37. Second time, day 34. Both times, around day 30 my mind pulled out all the stops. It wasn't anything remotely close to random "15 minute cravings" that "hang on, it will go away.". It became the opposite by day 30... it became inescapable all-day events. A lovely morning became a long miserable day by noon and lasted the rest of the day. And more intense the next day. Rinse repeat. No matter what I tried. I crawled through it each day but both quits it finally drove me to mental exhaustion and I relapsed.
I now know it was the beginning (for me) of PAWS. I'm in 90 day outpatient and I go to AA almost every day. Besides suggestions found from either of those, can anyone please just tell me their personal story getting through this PAWS period? It just felt so endless. No matter how much I "prepared" for it, it's all out the window once I'm consumed by the emotions. By the time I relapsed I swear I think I was only 1 or 2 steps away from forgetting my own sanity. Just blew my mind. And I'm a sane person. Particularly my second relapse, where I had all my OP and AA education I literally watched these emotions and predicted a relapse was looming. I still relapsed. (my first quit/relapse i did alone, uneducated. didn't know what i was going through)
how on earth do I make the leap from 30 days to 60 days. Quit alcohol means nothing... don't drink for 30 days, ok done. Now, live sober. I fail in the first week. Wtf?
Obviously the obvious answer is just keep quitting forever. Just hoping one of you up there can throw me a bone down here. I'm speechless how involved this quit is. "dont drink" isn't even a step. it's just a prerequisite to step 1-- rebuild your brain, followed by step 2-- live happily everafter. see? simple...
thanks
I relapsed twice. First time, day 37. Second time, day 34. Both times, around day 30 my mind pulled out all the stops. It wasn't anything remotely close to random "15 minute cravings" that "hang on, it will go away.". It became the opposite by day 30... it became inescapable all-day events. A lovely morning became a long miserable day by noon and lasted the rest of the day. And more intense the next day. Rinse repeat. No matter what I tried. I crawled through it each day but both quits it finally drove me to mental exhaustion and I relapsed.
I now know it was the beginning (for me) of PAWS. I'm in 90 day outpatient and I go to AA almost every day. Besides suggestions found from either of those, can anyone please just tell me their personal story getting through this PAWS period? It just felt so endless. No matter how much I "prepared" for it, it's all out the window once I'm consumed by the emotions. By the time I relapsed I swear I think I was only 1 or 2 steps away from forgetting my own sanity. Just blew my mind. And I'm a sane person. Particularly my second relapse, where I had all my OP and AA education I literally watched these emotions and predicted a relapse was looming. I still relapsed. (my first quit/relapse i did alone, uneducated. didn't know what i was going through)
how on earth do I make the leap from 30 days to 60 days. Quit alcohol means nothing... don't drink for 30 days, ok done. Now, live sober. I fail in the first week. Wtf?
Obviously the obvious answer is just keep quitting forever. Just hoping one of you up there can throw me a bone down here. I'm speechless how involved this quit is. "dont drink" isn't even a step. it's just a prerequisite to step 1-- rebuild your brain, followed by step 2-- live happily everafter. see? simple...
thanks
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: California
Posts: 2,693
That bell or bike person
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: london
Posts: 4,978
it became inescapable all-day events. A lovely morning became a long miserable day by noon and lasted the rest of the day. And more intense the next day. Rinse repeat. No matter what I tried. I crawled through it each day but both quits it finally drove me to mental exhaustion
2 days , 1 week , 1 month , bring it on i say there was nothing going to make me waste my life drinking again .
It was a war all i have to offer is blood , sweat and tears, I just sat through it mostly, good enough for buddah and Jesus in the desert y'know .
Vacillating between the decision to drink or not was the real torture i put myself through.
Quit , stay quit and go and do something more interesting , sometimes in doing something i was only 20% present but that was enough to get me through.
Frustrating , boring , anxious , miserable .. none of these things is fatal , Alcohol on the other hand is .
I've found alcohol is not a fix-it-all, it's not the answer to anything,
if I feel bored I do something ,
if I feel depressed I go see a Dr to get pills and therapy, go for walks and work on my attitude of gratitude .
For me sobriety has at least 2 elements , 1) not drinking , 2) learning how to deal with myself and life without drinking .
Bestwishes, m
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
My PAWS kicked in at about 6 months sober. I too was attending AA meetings so couldn't understand where this tsunami had blown in from. I won't go as far as to say I was suicidal, because I would have felt to guilty to actually kill myself. But I was going to bed every night praying that I wouldn't wake up, and praying every day that this could be my last. In the end my boss signed me up for counselling which I went to and managed to get through that without opening my hornets nest of resentments, fears, harms and relationships, apart from a few bits that I felt wouldn't reflect toooooo badly on me. Lol. After a few month of this, and getting in my car after every counselling session wondering why I found it impossible to be honest or even to think hard about the stuff that bothered me myself, I realised what I needed to do.
Up til that point I'd convinced myself that I was 'only a little bit alcoholic' and that I didn't need all that stuff like sponsors and step work. But my crazy conselling experiences had highlighted to me, there is no such thing as 'a little bit alcoholic'. Either I had an alcoholic perspective and thinking, or I didn't. And I'd realised, that I certainly DID. So, next meeting I steeled myself to ask someone to sponsor me. And the next day I started my step work with her. I also added in a step meeting and a Big Book meeting. She told me how she maintains her sobriety, and I did as she suggested. Daily step prayers (repeated as needed), reading the literature, doing my step work, contacting her and other members of AA, and of course still getting myself to meetings, but going out of my way to get to the most helpful ones, and getting there early and staying til lock-up so I could help set up and clear up. Over time I've also taken service positions . On my commute to work I stopped listening to emotionally triggering music, and started listening to AA Speaker tapes related to whatever step I was currently on, or issue I was currently facing. So, instead of sitting in meetings like I had been, waiting to be sprinkled with sobriety dust, I fully engaged with the program. I did the 'work' that is alluded to, and it paid off slowly and surely. I wasn't instantly happy, joyous and free, but there was instantly some relief, and as I worked the steps and those promises gradually came true for me (something I really hadn't believed could ever happen - I suppose I'd read the promises as being some kind of advertising spiel. But they DO come true, when we work for them. Its pretty amazing to me.)
Today, I do notice that if I get distracted and stop immersing myself in the program it isn't long before I feel myself being sucked back into the vortex. So all these things need to be part of my routine, and my recovery Work has to take priority whatever else is happening in my life.
Up til that point I'd convinced myself that I was 'only a little bit alcoholic' and that I didn't need all that stuff like sponsors and step work. But my crazy conselling experiences had highlighted to me, there is no such thing as 'a little bit alcoholic'. Either I had an alcoholic perspective and thinking, or I didn't. And I'd realised, that I certainly DID. So, next meeting I steeled myself to ask someone to sponsor me. And the next day I started my step work with her. I also added in a step meeting and a Big Book meeting. She told me how she maintains her sobriety, and I did as she suggested. Daily step prayers (repeated as needed), reading the literature, doing my step work, contacting her and other members of AA, and of course still getting myself to meetings, but going out of my way to get to the most helpful ones, and getting there early and staying til lock-up so I could help set up and clear up. Over time I've also taken service positions . On my commute to work I stopped listening to emotionally triggering music, and started listening to AA Speaker tapes related to whatever step I was currently on, or issue I was currently facing. So, instead of sitting in meetings like I had been, waiting to be sprinkled with sobriety dust, I fully engaged with the program. I did the 'work' that is alluded to, and it paid off slowly and surely. I wasn't instantly happy, joyous and free, but there was instantly some relief, and as I worked the steps and those promises gradually came true for me (something I really hadn't believed could ever happen - I suppose I'd read the promises as being some kind of advertising spiel. But they DO come true, when we work for them. Its pretty amazing to me.)
Today, I do notice that if I get distracted and stop immersing myself in the program it isn't long before I feel myself being sucked back into the vortex. So all these things need to be part of my routine, and my recovery Work has to take priority whatever else is happening in my life.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: California
Posts: 2,693
This was my experience up above. I was a very sick person at the end. Hungover all day, every day. Drinking myself to sleep every night. Diagnosed with high blood pressure. High enzymes. Shaky hands in the mornings. Headaches were my normal. I never didn't have a throbbing headache.
I felt "better" after a week but foggy brain, weird spells of feeling hyperactive and other spells of feeling the most tired I had ever felt.
I'll cut to the chase. As I think back I firmly believe that I felt about one percent better each day. I felt phenomenally better on day 100 than I did day one. 100 percent better.
However, it took a year to feel truly, completely lucid like my central nervous system was running like anybody who'd never had a drink in their life.
I'll repeat. I now feel like someone who's never had a drink in their life. Up I will too.
What I find funny is how I look back at that first month as so awful but really, I felt better on day 2 than I ever did with an actual alcohol-induced hangover. Foggy yes. Tired yes. But nothing like that head-splitting, heart pounding day after drinkingcfeeling.
I felt "better" after a week but foggy brain, weird spells of feeling hyperactive and other spells of feeling the most tired I had ever felt.
I'll cut to the chase. As I think back I firmly believe that I felt about one percent better each day. I felt phenomenally better on day 100 than I did day one. 100 percent better.
However, it took a year to feel truly, completely lucid like my central nervous system was running like anybody who'd never had a drink in their life.
I'll repeat. I now feel like someone who's never had a drink in their life. Up I will too.
What I find funny is how I look back at that first month as so awful but really, I felt better on day 2 than I ever did with an actual alcohol-induced hangover. Foggy yes. Tired yes. But nothing like that head-splitting, heart pounding day after drinkingcfeeling.
12 Step Recovered Alcoholic
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 6,613
We didn't have PAWS when I recovered so it wasn't an issue anyone thought about. For sure, the first few days detoxing can't usually be sped up, but I have noticed the big changes that I see in people and experienced myself seem to have less to do with time and more to do with action. It so happened that on my 90 day, give or take, I was working step nine when the whole world seemed to change.
Some have that experience sooner, some later, but the common theme is progress with the steps. I have an idea that is why the ninth step promises were written that way. i.e. this is what happened as we worked step nine, not this is what happened at 3 months, 4 months or whatever.
Some have that experience sooner, some later, but the common theme is progress with the steps. I have an idea that is why the ninth step promises were written that way. i.e. this is what happened as we worked step nine, not this is what happened at 3 months, 4 months or whatever.
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
Pic,
I was going bat crazy at 30 days, just like you. I had trouble w noise, lights, movement. I felt like I was going to lose control of my bodily functions sometimes. I would leave work, when I could, and sit in my car. I would always lie down when I had a chance. This went on well past 30 days. It went on for 6 months.
I didn't join SR until 80 days clean because I was searching the internet on why I felt nuts. SR saved my life.
What really helped me was excercise. I was working out pretty hard before I quit. I started traing Dec 2014 and quit boozing May 2015.
The excercise was easy to intense. I do Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. The whole body aspect and the physical interaction seemed to work for me. I would supplement the BJJ w cardio and weights here and there.
I was getting physically stronger, but the mental was and still is healing. My BJJ has improved, the physical has improved. My desire to drink is there, lurking, but I remember the hell on earth I went through to get this far.
I think the adrenaline rushes I get from training have helped a bit. When I am working out and afterwards I sometimes feel amazing. This is reassuring, and strengthens me.
If I didn't do BJJ, I would have to find another way to work out. Walking, running, calesthetics, anything. It would have to be at least 3 days a week for at least 3o minutes. That would be the bottom end. Top end..5 to 6 days a week for about 45 min. Max. That would get r done.
I always want to remember the horror of getting clean. I want it to stay fresh in my mind. That is why I like to talk about it here. That is probably part of why AA works. The constant craving needs constant reminder and vigilance.
The daily reminder keeps the addiction, now just mental, in a daily state of remission. Slip away from SR or AA, and we forget we are addicts.
We start to think we can handle the booze. Next thing we know, in a nutshell, we are drunk, hungover, and back to square one.
At 30 days clean, you are physically free. You are out of shape, but you are free to get in shape. The mental problems become more apparent after the physical recovery. Stay close to AA, sponser, and SR.
Hope this helps. Thanks for the post.
I was going bat crazy at 30 days, just like you. I had trouble w noise, lights, movement. I felt like I was going to lose control of my bodily functions sometimes. I would leave work, when I could, and sit in my car. I would always lie down when I had a chance. This went on well past 30 days. It went on for 6 months.
I didn't join SR until 80 days clean because I was searching the internet on why I felt nuts. SR saved my life.
What really helped me was excercise. I was working out pretty hard before I quit. I started traing Dec 2014 and quit boozing May 2015.
The excercise was easy to intense. I do Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. The whole body aspect and the physical interaction seemed to work for me. I would supplement the BJJ w cardio and weights here and there.
I was getting physically stronger, but the mental was and still is healing. My BJJ has improved, the physical has improved. My desire to drink is there, lurking, but I remember the hell on earth I went through to get this far.
I think the adrenaline rushes I get from training have helped a bit. When I am working out and afterwards I sometimes feel amazing. This is reassuring, and strengthens me.
If I didn't do BJJ, I would have to find another way to work out. Walking, running, calesthetics, anything. It would have to be at least 3 days a week for at least 3o minutes. That would be the bottom end. Top end..5 to 6 days a week for about 45 min. Max. That would get r done.
I always want to remember the horror of getting clean. I want it to stay fresh in my mind. That is why I like to talk about it here. That is probably part of why AA works. The constant craving needs constant reminder and vigilance.
The daily reminder keeps the addiction, now just mental, in a daily state of remission. Slip away from SR or AA, and we forget we are addicts.
We start to think we can handle the booze. Next thing we know, in a nutshell, we are drunk, hungover, and back to square one.
At 30 days clean, you are physically free. You are out of shape, but you are free to get in shape. The mental problems become more apparent after the physical recovery. Stay close to AA, sponser, and SR.
Hope this helps. Thanks for the post.
A Day at a Time
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Grand Rapids MI
Posts: 6,435
Recovery is a journey not a destination. We go backward and forward but all in all we are trudging the road to happy destiny. We are never fixed we just get to a point where alcohol is a minor inconvenience.
Mini Novel Post Writer
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Maine
Posts: 3,649
This is always such a hard question to answer. We all share a common bond with each other in our problems with drinking. Still, we don't share the same life or brain. Everyone is different.
So far the absolute truth that I found is this. The only time I ever had true peace with sobriety is when I fully accepted that I can't drink. No reason, no amount of fighting with myself about it. It wasn't going to happen.
This is what forced me to make sure I planned ahead and when I felt an urge I had something ready to busy myself until the urge subsided. If I hadn't fully accepted I couldn't drink that urge was multiplied. I called someone, I went to a meeting, I picked up a book and forced myself to keep reading. I grabbed an ice cream and watched something good on tv. I went for a walk. Anything I had to do.
If you're spending each day just sitting and waiting for the urge to go away and feeling the same way the next day consider what you're doing to take your mind off of it. Sometimes you have to really force yourself into doing what you need to do. That's why it's called being active in your recovery. You're building sober muscles. Each time you do this you'll get accustomed to it. Repeating this process eventually shortens the time of urges and the frequency.
I was sober for 17 months, the weekends (my time to drink) were really hard the first 30 days. The next 30 were a bit easier. The more I was active in sobriety the better it got.
At about month 14 some of my old ways of thinking started coming back. I walked away from my program, stopped talking to my sponsor so frequently, my posts on this board also became far less frequent. My relapse started long before I actually gave in. Then I went back out for 19 months and I'm paying for it. It took me what happened to realize that there will never come a day that there's a safe amount of alcohol, ever. Still, I know that my addictive voice is probably going to kick in down the line after I get through the hell I'm going through right now. I already have a plan in place for that.
This really does get better but it gets much better, faster based on your acceptance and plan of action.
So far the absolute truth that I found is this. The only time I ever had true peace with sobriety is when I fully accepted that I can't drink. No reason, no amount of fighting with myself about it. It wasn't going to happen.
This is what forced me to make sure I planned ahead and when I felt an urge I had something ready to busy myself until the urge subsided. If I hadn't fully accepted I couldn't drink that urge was multiplied. I called someone, I went to a meeting, I picked up a book and forced myself to keep reading. I grabbed an ice cream and watched something good on tv. I went for a walk. Anything I had to do.
If you're spending each day just sitting and waiting for the urge to go away and feeling the same way the next day consider what you're doing to take your mind off of it. Sometimes you have to really force yourself into doing what you need to do. That's why it's called being active in your recovery. You're building sober muscles. Each time you do this you'll get accustomed to it. Repeating this process eventually shortens the time of urges and the frequency.
I was sober for 17 months, the weekends (my time to drink) were really hard the first 30 days. The next 30 were a bit easier. The more I was active in sobriety the better it got.
At about month 14 some of my old ways of thinking started coming back. I walked away from my program, stopped talking to my sponsor so frequently, my posts on this board also became far less frequent. My relapse started long before I actually gave in. Then I went back out for 19 months and I'm paying for it. It took me what happened to realize that there will never come a day that there's a safe amount of alcohol, ever. Still, I know that my addictive voice is probably going to kick in down the line after I get through the hell I'm going through right now. I already have a plan in place for that.
This really does get better but it gets much better, faster based on your acceptance and plan of action.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,431
I pretty much had the same experience blue outlined.
Did well, got complacent, relapsed briefly, and finally accepted I was done for good,
and things are much better now. Heading towards 7 months at the moment.
Yes, 30, 60, 90 day times were triggering, but I joined a gym,
started playing music, took up yoga, etc. and always did one of the
above when tempted.
You get stronger, but you just have to push through tough times.
That's the only way out in the end.
It does get much easier--I have relatively little trouble these days,
but the beginning was hard.
Did well, got complacent, relapsed briefly, and finally accepted I was done for good,
and things are much better now. Heading towards 7 months at the moment.
Yes, 30, 60, 90 day times were triggering, but I joined a gym,
started playing music, took up yoga, etc. and always did one of the
above when tempted.
You get stronger, but you just have to push through tough times.
That's the only way out in the end.
It does get much easier--I have relatively little trouble these days,
but the beginning was hard.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
Took me 4 months before the nightmars stopped.
I think that at around 6 months I could see some light.
It's different for evryone.
There is poll thread around here somewhere that covers time sober before feeling better.
A nice sober day wished for all,
Mountainmanbob
I think that at around 6 months I could see some light.
It's different for evryone.
There is poll thread around here somewhere that covers time sober before feeling better.
A nice sober day wished for all,
Mountainmanbob
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
I have quit, for fairly good stretches, many many times. And I can say, it has been somewhat different each time. I had one quite, about 7 years ago that lasted 7 months and I was miserable the entire time. I was 'doing' everything right and as a matter of fact I was attending an AA women's retreat. That is what threw me over the edge....take that back. I LET it throw me over the edge. I left early....then drank about 2 weeks later. This time? I'm at day 28 and am completely at peace. When I quit for 2 years, PAWS set in around 5 months but was manageable.
For me, my serenity is directly in proportion with my level of acceptance. Right now? If I drink, I die. I'm that low. May not happen the next time I drink, but it will happen. Or worse, I go completely insane....and that is showing itself big time when I drink. I see my mind and my soul completely slipping away to the point of no return. So I guess I drank myself so low psychically that stopping is a reprieve.
For me, my serenity is directly in proportion with my level of acceptance. Right now? If I drink, I die. I'm that low. May not happen the next time I drink, but it will happen. Or worse, I go completely insane....and that is showing itself big time when I drink. I see my mind and my soul completely slipping away to the point of no return. So I guess I drank myself so low psychically that stopping is a reprieve.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 12
For me its been approximately 8 months, but everyones different. Within the last 2 weeks I have felt my PAWS slipping away (or maybe I just noticed it more). Hang in there, it DOES get better!!!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Pacific Coast
Posts: 785
I'm always a bit perplexed by these "timeline" questions. What difference would it make if someone said it takes exactly six weeks? Or six months? Or six years?
There are only two options: stay sober for however long it takes until you "feel like a breath of fresh air" again, or don't stay sober and reset the whole process back to square one -- or worse.
It takes whatever it takes.
Sorry if this is cantankerous, but I guess I'm in Captain Obvious mode this morning, not Mr. Warm-n-Fuzzy (he makes only rare appearances in any case).
There are only two options: stay sober for however long it takes until you "feel like a breath of fresh air" again, or don't stay sober and reset the whole process back to square one -- or worse.
It takes whatever it takes.
Sorry if this is cantankerous, but I guess I'm in Captain Obvious mode this morning, not Mr. Warm-n-Fuzzy (he makes only rare appearances in any case).
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,512
It took me about 10 months to feel completely comfortable. You said that you are consumed by your feelings. It was a huge breakthrough for me to know that my feelings did not control me, they were not me and I could feel them and let them go. "A New Earth" by Eckhart Tolle helped me so much to understand that emotions are simply feelings and that we can live in a Mindful way.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Midwest USA
Posts: 630
I think about 9 months for me to start feeling really good and not have cravings at all......
At around 6 months I had bursts of good feelings, then would backslide a little.
Now at 19 months today, I have no cravings, no desire and count myself as a very lucky person to not be addicted to alcohol. I consider alcohol a nasty substance and want nothing to do with it!
At around 6 months I had bursts of good feelings, then would backslide a little.
Now at 19 months today, I have no cravings, no desire and count myself as a very lucky person to not be addicted to alcohol. I consider alcohol a nasty substance and want nothing to do with it!
NA Member - Atheist
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: Middletown CT USA
Posts: 770
All the answers so far are good.
The timeline is different for everyone. I recall 6 months, and year (give or take) having moments where I realized that I was starting to feel OK. I've continued to have moments where I realize that I'm more capable at handling life than I was a while ago.
Some of that is related to time clean and sober. However, for me, actively participating in the process of recovery is what produces results. Not just going to meetings, but the whole enchilada.
One of the toughest parts of recovery seems to be persevering in the program of recovery even when it seems like nothing is happening. As addicts, we like instant results. That's not how real life works. As Andante said, it takes what it takes.
The timeline is different for everyone. I recall 6 months, and year (give or take) having moments where I realized that I was starting to feel OK. I've continued to have moments where I realize that I'm more capable at handling life than I was a while ago.
Some of that is related to time clean and sober. However, for me, actively participating in the process of recovery is what produces results. Not just going to meetings, but the whole enchilada.
One of the toughest parts of recovery seems to be persevering in the program of recovery even when it seems like nothing is happening. As addicts, we like instant results. That's not how real life works. As Andante said, it takes what it takes.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 709
I think everyone is different, as you've seen by the responses here. But for most people, it DOES happen. I'd say I started feeling like my old self at around 4 months. I don't think I've experienced PAWS -- at least not yet, knock on wood -- and I gather that's a whole different ball of wax. I found that the less I concentrated on alcohol and listening to others talk about alcohol, the less I thought about it. Instead, I fill my time with enjoyable activities that I used to love doing (i.e. reading) but rarely did when I was drinking. I'm almost 8 months sober and I rarely think about drinking, except when I'm on this board (but that's helping people, a good thing) and when I go out and see others drinking. Gotta admit, that part still sucks. The longer you remain sober, the less you'll crave alcohol. Have you seen your doctor about your PAWS? Maybe he/she can offer some medication to offset your symptoms. I'm sorry you're going through this....keep posting here, it helps.
now's the time
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 2,181
One thing that helped me was to read a lot about the science behind what was happening in my brain and body. It was hard to track down useful info and I don't have any great sources to recommend, but I spent a lot of time on Google Scholar reading papers and studies. It helped to ground me in the idea that this is a physical process, back when it was really the most present thing in my life. And that helped me remember that drinking only meant starting the same process over from the beginning, not getting around it some how.
3 months was the first big turning point towards normal for me. 6 was big too. Currently coming up towards 11 months and while I'm definitely aware that I'm still a somewhat delicate person... I'm 32 years old, but my existing coping mechanisms are like 9 months old, so there's a disconnect there... most days I feel like the person I was before the drinking got out of control.
3 months was the first big turning point towards normal for me. 6 was big too. Currently coming up towards 11 months and while I'm definitely aware that I'm still a somewhat delicate person... I'm 32 years old, but my existing coping mechanisms are like 9 months old, so there's a disconnect there... most days I feel like the person I was before the drinking got out of control.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 1,130
I found that helping other people was the key to a real internal change. I worked with homeless people once a week for about two years. Even if I felt a bit unhappy or stressed about my recovery, I found I could still help other people and this helped shift my own mood, little by little.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
