Well I've relapsed
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Huntington Beach, CA
Posts: 7
Well I've relapsed
...Xanax, adderall, and alcohol... and Valium a few days ago. I had my Xanax script filled and couldn't help myself. I found myself taking 1, then 1/2 by mouth to make it more effective...then I'd be about to snort one but add another 1 or 1/2 to snort cuz why not? Next thing you know I'm almost out, and it's been a week. I'm on anti-seizure medication as it is. I just need to slowly reduce my intake over the next couple of days...pray for me.
Can anyone relate? Not to mention, I've never felt so lonely in my life. I know this will pass, but I have a sad feeling and I don't really know why.
Can anyone relate? Not to mention, I've never felt so lonely in my life. I know this will pass, but I have a sad feeling and I don't really know why.
Just coming back to this site after an alcohol relapse. I know that pills have a worse withdrawal, I hope things go well for you. Relapsing just ups anxiety and depression's games times a thousand. No words of wisdom, just wanted to say the cycle of addiction is hard to break. It takes too much out of you. I don't know about you, but a relapse is just a reminder of how joyless use and abuse is for me now. I want sobriety more now, but sure took a lot of falls to finally wake up. Good luck.
Addiction tends to make us even more isolated and makes relating to others difficult .
I hope you reach out and build some face to face connections too beach kid , that might help ?
Bestwishes, m
I hope you reach out and build some face to face connections too beach kid , that might help ?
Bestwishes, m
I can certainly relate to 'doing ok' moderation wise and then going back to worse than my previous worst.
do you have any support apart from us?
If you find yourself in trouble, please do go and see your dr or your local hospital.
do you have any support apart from us?
If you find yourself in trouble, please do go and see your dr or your local hospital.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
I'm sorry you relapsed. I'm kind of a broken record on this one but benzos are so dangerous for most alcoholics. The combination with alcohol absolutely can kill you dead. I tried to kill myself in 2007 (first PTSD attack) with alcohol and benzos. They had to resuscitate me 3 times. So I almost succeeded. If you want to be sober you will have to be strong enough to refuse benzos. The dr that is prescribing...does he/she know you're an addict? If they do, find a new dr. Good luck.
Not the judge yet again!
You remind me of me.
Years ago I was a couple of weeks short of getting my 3 year sober token in AA. I went to get my Valium prescription filled and in short time I was taking more than prescribed and mixing them with booze. I was like -- dang what hit me -- then I crashed our motor home into a commercial building.
Back to sober day one with a mad wife, mad neighbors, disappointed family and not looking forward to seeing the judge yet again.
MB
Years ago I was a couple of weeks short of getting my 3 year sober token in AA. I went to get my Valium prescription filled and in short time I was taking more than prescribed and mixing them with booze. I was like -- dang what hit me -- then I crashed our motor home into a commercial building.
Back to sober day one with a mad wife, mad neighbors, disappointed family and not looking forward to seeing the judge yet again.
MB
Do check with your dr if you feel concerned about your withdrawals. Is there something you can do differently this time to help avoid a relapse? I'm glad you're back and posting.
Hey BeachKid,
I take Xanax on a rare occasion for anxiety, I have been fortunate not to let it get to me. Your feelings of loneliness are probably just that--feelings(drug induced). You're not alone, many people on here and in the world are going what you are going through right now.
A person who is prescribed medications like Xanax needs to learn to appreciate and respect the power they hold. I know this may come off harsh but I don't think you appreciate and respect them at all by abusing them the way you have and even going as far to snort them. They are meant to alleviate anxiety as needed. I never understood anyone's reason for wanting to take Xanax to get high since the end result is always drowsiness and falling a sleep within a few hours of taking one for me.
Don't beat yourself up over this, however. You need to learn from this and abstain from filling and taking these sort of medications that you know you have a high potential to abuse. If you live with someone else who is not an addict maybe you should entrust your medication with them so that it can serve as a check of you not abusing them, someone who will make you follow the directives of that particular medication.
I am going to pray for you and I certainly wish you the best and want to see you well. Do yourself a favor though, if you start experiencing withdrawals you are likely going to need to visit the ER. Benzodizepine withdrawals are no laughing matter.
I take Xanax on a rare occasion for anxiety, I have been fortunate not to let it get to me. Your feelings of loneliness are probably just that--feelings(drug induced). You're not alone, many people on here and in the world are going what you are going through right now.
A person who is prescribed medications like Xanax needs to learn to appreciate and respect the power they hold. I know this may come off harsh but I don't think you appreciate and respect them at all by abusing them the way you have and even going as far to snort them. They are meant to alleviate anxiety as needed. I never understood anyone's reason for wanting to take Xanax to get high since the end result is always drowsiness and falling a sleep within a few hours of taking one for me.
Don't beat yourself up over this, however. You need to learn from this and abstain from filling and taking these sort of medications that you know you have a high potential to abuse. If you live with someone else who is not an addict maybe you should entrust your medication with them so that it can serve as a check of you not abusing them, someone who will make you follow the directives of that particular medication.
I am going to pray for you and I certainly wish you the best and want to see you well. Do yourself a favor though, if you start experiencing withdrawals you are likely going to need to visit the ER. Benzodizepine withdrawals are no laughing matter.
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