3 days "strong"
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: PHX, AZ
Posts: 10
3 days "strong"
Hey all
I've been an everyday weed smoker for the last 3 years (living where it is legal sure is a %^&*). At first I was smoking to take my mind off a break up, but then I just never stopped. I tried to quit multiple times but in the end there I was either at my dealer or at the store reupping. My self-respect went through the floor at this point and I stopped caring for awhile and basically locked myself away in my room for 3 months not interacting with people except over Teamspeak with games and smoking. I actually was forced to move states (back in with my parents
) because of money problems cause I couldn't find a job because I was too lazy, which forced me to quit, but it does make me feel bad that I couldn't beat it on willpower alone.
Maybe "beat" isn't the right word, I only ever think about smoking when I'm breathing. Still, it does feel nice getting off the stuff even though I can't sleep AT ALL and have just enough of a headache to put me in a bad mood but not debilitate me since day 2. My current state is also about to legalize in November which I was not aware of and really don't like because I'm already counting down the days and trying to justify it to myself that "Yeah once I get over this hump I can start up again and control myself better."
On the plus side though I'm bored literally ALL THE TIME which doesn't sound good but I've started working out and learning to code to keep my mind busy. Also my sex drive has come back and I also find myself actually wanting to go out and socialize with people again.
Sorry for ranting a bit.
TL;DR This sucks.
I've been an everyday weed smoker for the last 3 years (living where it is legal sure is a %^&*). At first I was smoking to take my mind off a break up, but then I just never stopped. I tried to quit multiple times but in the end there I was either at my dealer or at the store reupping. My self-respect went through the floor at this point and I stopped caring for awhile and basically locked myself away in my room for 3 months not interacting with people except over Teamspeak with games and smoking. I actually was forced to move states (back in with my parents
) because of money problems cause I couldn't find a job because I was too lazy, which forced me to quit, but it does make me feel bad that I couldn't beat it on willpower alone. Maybe "beat" isn't the right word, I only ever think about smoking when I'm breathing. Still, it does feel nice getting off the stuff even though I can't sleep AT ALL and have just enough of a headache to put me in a bad mood but not debilitate me since day 2. My current state is also about to legalize in November which I was not aware of and really don't like because I'm already counting down the days and trying to justify it to myself that "Yeah once I get over this hump I can start up again and control myself better."
On the plus side though I'm bored literally ALL THE TIME which doesn't sound good but I've started working out and learning to code to keep my mind busy. Also my sex drive has come back and I also find myself actually wanting to go out and socialize with people again.
Sorry for ranting a bit.
TL;DR This sucks.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 130
Welcome to SR. Whether legal or not, it's the easiest thing to get weed, so don't get too hung up on how to get it, just focus on the good things you can experience without it. New job which will allow you to move out of your parents' house, exercise, coding expertise and hey, who doesn't want a healthy sex drive to provide motivation!
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,205
Congratulations on quitting TMQ. I am sure it must be tough for you right now but in the long term it has to be better than having no income and living with your parents so stick with.
Maybe a visit to your doctor might be in order to possibly get some help with withdrawals/headache/insomnia
Maybe a visit to your doctor might be in order to possibly get some help with withdrawals/headache/insomnia
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
Hi and welcome ThisMachineQuit 
I smoked pot for a long time. Getting off it wasn't fun but things got better after a few days and then progressively from there.
I think the best approach to the boredom is to force yourself to get up and do things, even if it's housecleaning or a walk around the block or whatever.
Think about your hobbies or interests or things you'd like to try. Now's a good time to start something like that
I got a lot out of volunteering in my community too. Got me out of the house and didn't give me time to think about myself too much
There's a marijuana sub forum here - I put together some links that you might find helpful:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ful-links.html
As far as legalisation goes - alcohol's legal too and as an alcoholic I manage to avoid that.
You can do this - glad you've joined us
D
I smoked pot for a long time. Getting off it wasn't fun but things got better after a few days and then progressively from there.
I think the best approach to the boredom is to force yourself to get up and do things, even if it's housecleaning or a walk around the block or whatever.
Think about your hobbies or interests or things you'd like to try. Now's a good time to start something like that
I got a lot out of volunteering in my community too. Got me out of the house and didn't give me time to think about myself too much
There's a marijuana sub forum here - I put together some links that you might find helpful:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ful-links.html
As far as legalisation goes - alcohol's legal too and as an alcoholic I manage to avoid that.
You can do this - glad you've joined us
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: PHX, AZ
Posts: 10
I spent all day in doctors offices getting tested for cancer. I have a lump in my neck and the doctor was really concerned. I'm really scared because I don't have insurance so if it is cancer IDK what I'll do. I'm only 22 this is BS.
They won't be able to tell me the results till monday... and now I really want to smoke.
They won't be able to tell me the results till monday... and now I really want to smoke.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Southern Oregon U.S.
Posts: 1,023
Good luck with the results. Sending some good mojo your way. I quit the weed and know how hard it is but it sounds like you're ready for a change. Try your best to stay sober through this tough weekend, and you'll be well on your way.
-Ted
-Ted
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
Originally Posted by ThisMachineQuit 
I spent all day in doctors offices getting tested for cancer. I have a lump in my neck and the doctor was really concerned. I'm really scared because I don't have insurance so if it is cancer IDK what I'll do. I'm only 22 this is BS.
They won't be able to tell me the results till monday... and now I really want to smoke.
They won't be able to tell me the results till monday... and now I really want to smoke.
If it was cancer, the worst thing you could do would be to smoke.
If it's not cancer the worst thing you could do would be to smoke.
I went through a cancer scare myself. (it wasn't at all and I'm not setting myself up as a cancer survivor or anything - it was my own misreading of an xray)
the point is it wasn't fun but getting through that stress sober really helped me work out what was important in my life - and it gave me a sense of confidence in myself in getting through that fear filled weekend clean and sober.
I ran away from so many things over the years - not running away helped put my fear in perspective. Running away was my old life. I wanted change and personal growth.
I'm hoping for an all clear result for you man
Lean on the support here
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: PHX, AZ
Posts: 10
Got some of the results back. Blood test came back clear (except low potassium) but the nurse called to tell me the results instead of the doctor. I asked her if that means we can rule out cancer but she couldn't tell me. I was so mad about that, why would she call me instead of the doctor? I want to talk to someone who can actually give me some F-ing answers, not some $%^&$%^& useless nurse. 
Still waiting on the neck ultrasound results to come back. I'm going to ask to speak to the actual doctor next time she calls. It feels like they're fing with my emotions, so I'm going to find a new doctor when this is done.
1 week sober though!
Still waiting on the neck ultrasound results to come back. I'm going to ask to speak to the actual doctor next time she calls. It feels like they're fing with my emotions, so I'm going to find a new doctor when this is done.
1 week sober though!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 2,412
Congrats on one week!! And congrats on the results!
I can relate to everything you said so far, except the cancer concerns.
As for the boredom, Dee is 100% right, as usual.
You CAN live a life that is thrilling, happy, and worth living without drugs! Yup. It's true. And you can get there simply by not using drugs anymore.
However, After hours of counseling and reading SR, I found a few tips that will push that process along quicker. I could spend all day talking about this topic. Feel free to PM me if you have struggles.
To me, the most important thing one can do is to change their mindset to I CAN. Us addicts get too hung up on what we can't do. When we're bored, for example, we only know one way to not be bored any more and all we think is we can't smoke. It's an infinite loop thought process that leads to nowhere.
Instead, we have to TRAIN ourselves to think what CAN we do! You can get there by constantly reminding yourself or asking yourself that question. At first, you need to force yourself. But the more often you force yourself to think of the things you CAN do, the quicker you'll do that automatically without forcing yourself.
I'll just explain what I did. It worked for me.
- I set reminders in my phone that would pop up the question "what CAN I do" a few times a day for a month straight.
- I used my notes app to make a list of things I CAN do. Some things were small, some huge.
- I scheduled a MINIMUM of 1 hour a week to focus only on my list. Sometimes it was less than an hour but I put a lot of effort into it. I searched online for local activities, movies that were playing, group-on deals I could jump on, etc.
- I would change that reminder, "What CAN I do", weekly so that it would address areas of my life depending on what time I set each reminder. . Like "What CAN I do to be more successful" would go off at work. "What CAN I do this weekend" would go off Wednesday night. I liked Wednesday b/c it got me thinking about the upcoming weekend and made the week shorter.
- just do it. There are times when nothing seems interesting. Hell...right now that may feel like ALL the time. But I forced myself to just do something on my list. JUST DO IT!! I changed my reminders to "just do it" a few times in fact.
- Saturday morning, I would set the tempo for the entire weekend and go for a walk. I didn't like exercising. Especially early in my quit, it was hard to motivate myself to go. But I was ALWAYS thankful I did. Not a single time was I sorry I forced myself to go on that walk. Not once. And when I was done, I could say I JUST DID IT!! I not only felt better because of the walk, but I set the expectation for the entire weekend...JUST DO IT.
- exercise is probably the MOST effective thing you CAN do to improve your mood and outlook. Force yourself to do it and eventually the benefits become so clear to you that you won't want to stop. Now I not only walk Saturday mornings (which I actually anticipate), but I have a boot camp class on Mondays and a cycling class on Thursdays.
Again...one week off pot is awesome. Way to go. You are over the worst of it. Now it's time to DO instead of stop!
I can relate to everything you said so far, except the cancer concerns.
As for the boredom, Dee is 100% right, as usual.
You CAN live a life that is thrilling, happy, and worth living without drugs! Yup. It's true. And you can get there simply by not using drugs anymore.
However, After hours of counseling and reading SR, I found a few tips that will push that process along quicker. I could spend all day talking about this topic. Feel free to PM me if you have struggles.
To me, the most important thing one can do is to change their mindset to I CAN. Us addicts get too hung up on what we can't do. When we're bored, for example, we only know one way to not be bored any more and all we think is we can't smoke. It's an infinite loop thought process that leads to nowhere.
Instead, we have to TRAIN ourselves to think what CAN we do! You can get there by constantly reminding yourself or asking yourself that question. At first, you need to force yourself. But the more often you force yourself to think of the things you CAN do, the quicker you'll do that automatically without forcing yourself.
I'll just explain what I did. It worked for me.
- I set reminders in my phone that would pop up the question "what CAN I do" a few times a day for a month straight.
- I used my notes app to make a list of things I CAN do. Some things were small, some huge.
- I scheduled a MINIMUM of 1 hour a week to focus only on my list. Sometimes it was less than an hour but I put a lot of effort into it. I searched online for local activities, movies that were playing, group-on deals I could jump on, etc.
- I would change that reminder, "What CAN I do", weekly so that it would address areas of my life depending on what time I set each reminder. . Like "What CAN I do to be more successful" would go off at work. "What CAN I do this weekend" would go off Wednesday night. I liked Wednesday b/c it got me thinking about the upcoming weekend and made the week shorter.
- just do it. There are times when nothing seems interesting. Hell...right now that may feel like ALL the time. But I forced myself to just do something on my list. JUST DO IT!! I changed my reminders to "just do it" a few times in fact.
- Saturday morning, I would set the tempo for the entire weekend and go for a walk. I didn't like exercising. Especially early in my quit, it was hard to motivate myself to go. But I was ALWAYS thankful I did. Not a single time was I sorry I forced myself to go on that walk. Not once. And when I was done, I could say I JUST DID IT!! I not only felt better because of the walk, but I set the expectation for the entire weekend...JUST DO IT.
- exercise is probably the MOST effective thing you CAN do to improve your mood and outlook. Force yourself to do it and eventually the benefits become so clear to you that you won't want to stop. Now I not only walk Saturday mornings (which I actually anticipate), but I have a boot camp class on Mondays and a cycling class on Thursdays.
Again...one week off pot is awesome. Way to go. You are over the worst of it. Now it's time to DO instead of stop!
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