rahrah

Being a self-proclaimed, full-on DAY 1 HATER......I am determined to never go back.....and I have been working my recovery like crazy.

So far I've steered clear of ALL situations that involve alcohol since I quit. And to support me, my Husband has not had a drop since I quit either...so I've been fortunate in avoiding it.

But I can't hide forever....we have a dinner party to attend Saturday night, and all the girls are already texting me about how much fun it will be to catch up and 'have a glass of wine...have a glass of wine....have a glass of wine'!!!!

I've already told them all that I am doing the dry January and have felt so good that I intend to keep it up..so they can count me out for the wine...but count me in for the fun. (At this point...that's all I'm prepared to say to this group....I am not super close with them...they know I like my wine....but not that I have a problem with it...well....)

So in preparation for the evening, I've been thinking ahead of time about safety nets for when I am around alcohol.

I read a post that said something to the effect that 'whenever we are near an open bottle we are seconds away from disaster'.

That scared me because I am totally terrified of drinking again. And I am going to be around lots of open bottles on Saturday night. I thought about all the times in the past at social settings that I had tried to abstain...how I would just stand around the booze 'listening' to others while being tortured by my thoughts to pick up....and never was I successful in fighting the battle.

So what will I do different this time? I am in a pretty good place to begin with....I'll be at 7 weeks on Saturday and am not hating sobriety...I am not feeling resentful that I 'can't' drink, I am not white-knuckling it these days....to the contrary! I am GRATEFUL to be sober and GRATEFUL to be in active recovery...I am happy to be on the road to getting better and know it can only happen if I am fully sober....not even one....ever. So although I am nervous for Sat. night and going in with open eyes and prepared...I still need a safety net. What can I do if I feel like I am being taken over by an urge....

The only thing I can do is what I would do if my life were in danger in any other way....get the hell out of there!!!! If I were in a building surrounded by people and I heard a fire alarm go off...I wouldn't just stand around listening to others chit chat....I would be the first person charging for the door! And that's what I'll have to do Sat. night. If I feel that urge overcome me.....don't just stand around with a smile....instead turn that urge into the loudest fire alarm and get the hell out.

I would rather cut out abruptly...be rude....whatever I have to do to save myself than...go back to day one......I can always make my apologies later....at least I'll be making them sober, without a hangover and still on week 7 rather than sucky ole day one.


Or maybe I just won't go. lol

Dee74

If you have the slightest doubt, that's probably the best move IMO

D

trachemys

If you doubt you can last or walk away then don't go.

Thumpalumpacus

If you do go, be ready to bail out quickly. If you do go, don't drink, and don't apologize for teetotaling.

MIRecovery

I guard my sobriety like my life depended on because it does. I know for sure I couldn't have handled the situation your describing

least

Make sure you have an escape plan, just in case you are tempted.

SoberinSyracuse

You've got this. Your plan is perfect. Be ready to bail out quickly. Or if it gets closer and you're not feeling ready for this, go ahead and don't attend.

FWIW, whenever I go to a gathering where I may not want to stay that long (mostly due to the company being dreary), I tell everyone when I first arrive that I might be getting a call/text at some point... It's like a pre-printed hall pass! :-)

rahrah

Decided not to go...too much anxiety already....it's making me miserable...so I'm not going.....now I can feel miserable about letting my family down...kids would have enjoyed themselves....looks like my NOT drinking is affecting my family as well.

Water441

I agree if you're worried don't go. Don't go to something like that until you feel ready. My SO's big winter company outdoor party is Saturday and I'm just skipping out. Sure I'm missing out but for a really good reason for once : me.