Here I go again
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Gloucester, UK
Posts: 93
Here I go again
So I made it to 7 months back in September. Everything was brilliant and I felt great.
The last night of our little camping trip I decided to have a beer. I looked at it for about an hour but decided I could have one beer and it'd be okay. A long time had passed since how I was in January and February.
Since that beer I'm doing a bottle of vodka every night again. I'm so disgusted with myself. I was on here saying I've done six months, I'll never drink again.. But look at me now. A pathetic state again.
Today is my day 1. I'm not doing this any more. I don't even enjoy it. I feel guilty, horrible and selfish.
Such a fool, but here I go again and I'm looking forward to it. The no hangovers, the sharp thinking, the energy.
The last night of our little camping trip I decided to have a beer. I looked at it for about an hour but decided I could have one beer and it'd be okay. A long time had passed since how I was in January and February.
Since that beer I'm doing a bottle of vodka every night again. I'm so disgusted with myself. I was on here saying I've done six months, I'll never drink again.. But look at me now. A pathetic state again.
Today is my day 1. I'm not doing this any more. I don't even enjoy it. I feel guilty, horrible and selfish.
Such a fool, but here I go again and I'm looking forward to it. The no hangovers, the sharp thinking, the energy.
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
Welcome back! 
Ahhhhh....the hour of anguish....the hour of conflict....the hour of willfully accepting the chains of alcohol slavery.
I know that hour well, my friend.
Never again.
You can do this.
Originally Posted by Crasfd 
I decided to have a beer. I looked at it for about an hour
I know that hour well, my friend.
Never again.
You can do this.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 1,222
Sorry to hear about your relapse, it sounds terrible....the path back to full on destruction happened fast. Another timely warning before the Xmas hols of what happens when an alcoholic takes a beer. I know that was;t the purpose for your post but thanks anyway. Stick around and you will get those six months back soon enough. Min things now is for you to commit 100% to staying sober.
You're not shackled to not drinking, you're free from drinking
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 1,406
Welcome back and thanks for the reminder. The last time I had significant sobriety was 10 years ago. I thought I could have that one drink too. It took me 10 years to get back. Good for your on getting back sooner!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Gloucester, UK
Posts: 93
Originally Posted by Dee74
Welcome back Crasfd - and thanks for sharing your story. This thing really is so insidious...
Do you have a plan?
D
Do you have a plan?
D
My plan is just one day at a time, and spend as much time here as possible. This place is what got me off it last time, but I stopped coming here and look what happened. I've tried AA but didn't really like it. I know this place works for me, and know I shouldn't have stopped coming.
I also know that if I had of been coming here every day I would have been writing to you all about my AV that night on September 8th, saying that was a close one! rather than going through with the drink.
I knew I couldn't just have a beer, because I know I am an alcoholic.
Thanks
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Welcome back. I'm glad you made it back.
Keep posting - why not join the group who post once a day and commit to staying sober for 24 hours?
Here's the link:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...part-92-a.html
Keep posting - why not join the group who post once a day and commit to staying sober for 24 hours?
Here's the link:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...part-92-a.html
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: Southern California
Posts: 690
Originally Posted by jd1639
Welcome back and thanks for the reminder. The last time I had significant sobriety was 10 years ago. I thought I could have that one drink too. It took me 10 years to get back. Good for your on getting back sooner!
KIR
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