Notices

Very depressed for screwing up

Old 11-21-2015, 12:36 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Hollywood, CA
Posts: 18
Very depressed for screwing up

Today was just a bad day. Something in me this morning knew I wouldn't make it..and it's only been a week since quitting (again). Next thing I know, I'm at the liquor store. Next thing I know, I'm on my way home with the whiskey.

Not only that, I dropped the bottle and broke it. As if that weren't a second chance to turn back, I ended up buying a 2nd bottle.

I only drank probably 5 or 6 shots worth. But it got me pretty drunk. Enough to take a nap at least.

I screwed up. But tonight I put the bottle outside and set my house alarm so I won't go back out there and wake roommates up by undoing the alarm.

Trying to not be depressed and tell myself it was once and I won't do it again....
CaliMusician is offline  
Old 11-21-2015, 12:41 AM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Dee74's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,745
Beating yourself up too much will only deplete your self esteem and send you back into the clutches of the bottle.

Think about what happened and why? what could you do differently?
what else do you need to add to your recovery programme?

D
Dee74 is offline  
Old 11-21-2015, 12:41 AM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Magsie
 
Mags1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,879
Hi Cali, you did well to come here. Chuck your drink down the sink then you can't get tempted.

If you can come and talk to us before you drink we can give you the support.
Mags1 is online now  
Old 11-21-2015, 01:05 AM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Member
 
Ruby2's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
Starting out telling yourself it's a bad day, that you're not going to make it, is giving yourself permission to drink later on. Don't beat yourself up but change it up next time. I've found thst I largely choose my mood. If I'm having a bad day I can be mindful of that and work to change it. I think to myself that this too shall pass. I reach out here and in real life to my support network to tell them how I'm feeling. If I wait long enough, things usually improve.

You can do it. Post here first next time, right when you start feeling down about the day.
Ruby2 is offline  
Old 11-21-2015, 01:05 AM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Hollywood, CA
Posts: 18
My self-esteem in life pretty much can't be depleted any lower. Thanks though.
CaliMusician is offline  
Old 11-21-2015, 01:17 AM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Dee74's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,745
I understand the feeling but so you get my point? If you see no value in yourself it's much easy to say screw it and drink again.

You know you can be sober - now you just have to work on the staying sober - you're not back at the beginning - this can be recovery 2.0

D
Dee74 is offline  
Old 11-21-2015, 01:26 AM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Do your best
 
Soberwolf's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,046
Precisely what Dee74 said

No one gets sober first time round my life was non existent drinking & alcohol was only worsening alcohol has no remorse

The best decision I ever made in life was getting sober we'l be here for you all the way
Soberwolf is offline  
Old 11-21-2015, 02:06 AM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Member
 
teatreeoil007's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: America
Posts: 4,136
We're behind you!
teatreeoil007 is offline  
Old 11-21-2015, 03:18 AM
  # 9 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 1,518
Cali I can tell you that I slipped and binged for 4 days and when I sobered up and came back here the depression was overwhelming but I kept going and kept reading and believing SR posts . The depression did lift slowly and God only knows how hard it was not to reach for the bottle . I had to work very hard at changing my thinking. I know how hard it is but you can do it .

Last edited by hpdw; 11-21-2015 at 03:19 AM. Reason: typo
hpdw is offline  
Old 11-21-2015, 03:27 AM
  # 10 (permalink)  
Member
 
ccam1973's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Gulf Coast, USA
Posts: 2,229
Originally Posted by Dee74 View Post
I understand the feeling but so you get my point? If you see no value in yourself it's much easy to say screw it and drink again.

You know you can be sober - now you just have to work on the staying sober - you're not back at the beginning - this can be recovery 2.0

D
Dee always finds a way to make perfect sense... You've got to take small steps and find value in yourself. You are worth staying sober, we all are. You aren't alone in this and I guarantee, most of us here have been where you are at today.

You know how to be sober, now you've got to work on staying sober. Use the past as a learning experience, grow from what you now know so you don't repeat the mistakes again tomorrow.

Bottom line, you can do this. We are stronger than our excuses.

Lean on us as much as you need.
ccam1973 is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:53 PM.