Alternating feelings of extreme elation, and loss.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Suwon
Posts: 17
Alternating feelings of extreme elation, and loss.
Hey guys.
So coming up on a week sober after several years daily heavy drinking. The couple of days I just felt like I had a hangover still and had to force myself to pass by the shop by willpower alone. The third and fourth day were full of joy. I still felt a bit crappy/shaky/headache etc. but I also felt for the first time in a long time, that I was thinking clearly. I could apply myself to the tasks that had just seemed too much 'stress' to deal with at the time. I naively thought that perhaps quitting was that easy - great!
On the fourth day things changed. My overflowing energy disappeared, it was a struggle to even climb a flight of stairs (I'm 26...). My girlfriend finishes work a lot later than me, and that wait in the apartment dragged on for an eternity. I thought - 'What if I just had one, it'll take the edge off and I can cover it up before she gets home - she'll never know...'. During this time I felt very strange, I was used to the cravings. But phsyically I felt weird, I had a very irregular heartbeat, it would seem to beat very fast, then pause, then start again. I also felt out of breath. All this contributed to an overall feeling of anxiety. Is this a common symptom?
Happy ending: somehow I managed to sit out the long hours in my apartment chugging non alcoholic beers until she got home. I think that solitude is a trigger for me so getting past that is the hardest part. Anyway, does this sound familiar?
Stay strong peeps!
George
So coming up on a week sober after several years daily heavy drinking. The couple of days I just felt like I had a hangover still and had to force myself to pass by the shop by willpower alone. The third and fourth day were full of joy. I still felt a bit crappy/shaky/headache etc. but I also felt for the first time in a long time, that I was thinking clearly. I could apply myself to the tasks that had just seemed too much 'stress' to deal with at the time. I naively thought that perhaps quitting was that easy - great!
On the fourth day things changed. My overflowing energy disappeared, it was a struggle to even climb a flight of stairs (I'm 26...). My girlfriend finishes work a lot later than me, and that wait in the apartment dragged on for an eternity. I thought - 'What if I just had one, it'll take the edge off and I can cover it up before she gets home - she'll never know...'. During this time I felt very strange, I was used to the cravings. But phsyically I felt weird, I had a very irregular heartbeat, it would seem to beat very fast, then pause, then start again. I also felt out of breath. All this contributed to an overall feeling of anxiety. Is this a common symptom?
Happy ending: somehow I managed to sit out the long hours in my apartment chugging non alcoholic beers until she got home. I think that solitude is a trigger for me so getting past that is the hardest part. Anyway, does this sound familiar?
Stay strong peeps!
George
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,444
I'm glad you're back with us George.
If you've been a heavy drinker for a while, I think you have to steel yourself for a few more physical ups and downs yet.
Recuperation happens, but it takes a little while for mind and body to heal.
And the drinking NA beer and watching TV...George...that sounds like me as a drinker, only with alcoholic beer.
However bad you might feel, there's got to be better things to do with your day than that man?
All you need there for a relapse is the thought that NA beer sucks and one alcoholic beer won't hurt...y'know?
D
If you've been a heavy drinker for a while, I think you have to steel yourself for a few more physical ups and downs yet.
Recuperation happens, but it takes a little while for mind and body to heal.
And the drinking NA beer and watching TV...George...that sounds like me as a drinker, only with alcoholic beer.
However bad you might feel, there's got to be better things to do with your day than that man?
All you need there for a relapse is the thought that NA beer sucks and one alcoholic beer won't hurt...y'know?
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Suwon
Posts: 17
Very true Dee. The first few days I was productive as hell, hardly in the apartment at all. Even went for a few jogs etc. Just felt yesterday that as long as I made it until the end of the day without drinking, things would sort itself out. I hear what you're saying though, and have booked a week off to go camping by the beach (a former pastime that I'd grown too lazy and hungover to bother with in recent years). Hoping that the change of routine will help in the early days and also mentally prep me for the return home - I can't stay scared of my apartment forever! 
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: illinois
Posts: 907
Sounds like your body and mind are out of kilter and trying to adjust. Maybe a doctors visit, just to check the heart? Assuming that turns out fine, you will be uncomfortable for a bit. Then glimmers of optimism and energy will assert themselves. Once that starts, pay attention, and you may find losing the booze really isn't a loss.
Hang in there, man, I'm rooting for you!
Hang in there, man, I'm rooting for you!
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 267
Hey George--totally familiar. The anxiety for me was the worst symptom of all because it intensified everything else and just felt overwhelming at times. Great job making it through the long solitary hours. Gotta say I agree with Dee--NA beer only makes me want a real beer, and willpower is only so powerful. But if it helped you through that tough evening, great. I think the camping trip sounds like a perfect idea. Hang in there.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 654
I am pretty up and down at the moment too. Living alone and not having a significant other or a job means isolation is a huge issue. There is always a little more alone time than is good for my head at the moment.
If I can keep my little brain from running out for a drink I am sure you can too. It may be a while before we fully re learn being at peace just sat on your own for a bit. I used to be an expert at it.
If I can keep my little brain from running out for a drink I am sure you can too. It may be a while before we fully re learn being at peace just sat on your own for a bit. I used to be an expert at it.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: California
Posts: 2,693
Hey George,
A huge congratulations on your week. You've made a great choice to stop drinking alcohol. Your first week sounds a lot like mine did. Sometimes I was kinda excited about getting sober and starting a new life and other times I was seriously depressed and wondering if I'd ever enjoy life again.
The energy came and went. Depending on your mileage this may last awhile but if you're like me, feeling a bit off is way better than a hangover.
Stick with it. It does get much better.
A huge congratulations on your week. You've made a great choice to stop drinking alcohol. Your first week sounds a lot like mine did. Sometimes I was kinda excited about getting sober and starting a new life and other times I was seriously depressed and wondering if I'd ever enjoy life again.
The energy came and went. Depending on your mileage this may last awhile but if you're like me, feeling a bit off is way better than a hangover.
Stick with it. It does get much better.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 35
I think I read someone else say that if you have those cravings, think HALT:
H-hungry?
A- angry?
L- lonely?
T- tired?
Those are some of the biggie core triggers (besides routines and stuff you always had that involved drinking).
I haven't had to use this yet but when I put it into perspective, the last few times I drank before I quit if I would've asked myself am I hungry? Maybe my answer was yes (and then that's when I'd drink, because I'm a fitness fanatic and don't want to gain weight by eating- totally stupid, I know- so drink Vodka instead? Great plan. Not) or, maybe it wasn't that I was hungry, maybe I was angry. If not those two, move on to lonely. Quite often my reasoning was lonely, now that I think about it. Maybe yours was too, sitting in your apartment waiting. The drink is like your companion when you're lonely...it blots out loneliness and becomes your evil "friend". Being tired is another one. For some, like me, alcohol acted as an upper. I would literally drink all night when I pulled all-nighters working, or to get myself amped up to go partying. Which makes no sense because it's a depressant. But it did that for me, before I crashed down- way down- later. So next time you're hungry, eat. Angry? Go for a jog like you mentioned. I hit the gym and cravings dissipate. When you feel lonely, come on here to SR, craving will SURELY pass! Tired? Go to bed!
Headed there now! Hope this helps
H-hungry?
A- angry?
L- lonely?
T- tired?
Those are some of the biggie core triggers (besides routines and stuff you always had that involved drinking).
I haven't had to use this yet but when I put it into perspective, the last few times I drank before I quit if I would've asked myself am I hungry? Maybe my answer was yes (and then that's when I'd drink, because I'm a fitness fanatic and don't want to gain weight by eating- totally stupid, I know- so drink Vodka instead? Great plan. Not) or, maybe it wasn't that I was hungry, maybe I was angry. If not those two, move on to lonely. Quite often my reasoning was lonely, now that I think about it. Maybe yours was too, sitting in your apartment waiting. The drink is like your companion when you're lonely...it blots out loneliness and becomes your evil "friend". Being tired is another one. For some, like me, alcohol acted as an upper. I would literally drink all night when I pulled all-nighters working, or to get myself amped up to go partying. Which makes no sense because it's a depressant. But it did that for me, before I crashed down- way down- later. So next time you're hungry, eat. Angry? Go for a jog like you mentioned. I hit the gym and cravings dissipate. When you feel lonely, come on here to SR, craving will SURELY pass! Tired? Go to bed!
Headed there now! Hope this helps
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 831
I know that if I even use mouthwash that contains alcohol it messes up my brain chemistry enough to stimulate cravings. Some NA beer actually does have a very tiny amount of alcohol, so you might not feel like your drinking but your brain can still detect it's presence even in those tiny doses.
Not everyone is as sensitive to it as I am, but why would I choose to make it harder on myself than it already is?
Just something to think about.
Not everyone is as sensitive to it as I am, but why would I choose to make it harder on myself than it already is?
Just something to think about.
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