112 days
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 19
112 days
I’ve been wanting to make an intro post for months now, but I have trouble describing anything in less than a few pages. Here’s a little bit of my story. An alcoholic for seven years, I always drank by myself, 8 to 12 drinks of vodka a night and more on weekends. It began when I moved away from family to start a career. I was trying to stop the entire time but never had success more than a few weeks once a year.
In the last year and a half I was hospitalized several times for pancreatitis, gastritis, and alcoholic hepatitis. I went through three medical detoxes and spent numerous other nights in the ER being treated for dehydration or just being evaluated and sent on my way.
Having been turned away from the ER and already on the detox waiting list for weeks, I twice showed up claiming I was suicidal figuring it would force them to treat me for withdrawal. I was right about that and almost ended up in the psych ward before I decided to tell them I felt better and went home. I had thought about trying to break a leg or an arm to get treatment too, but figured I’d go into cardiac arrest and die an extremely foolish death. I was a train wreck.
My drinking caused me to lose my job and in the end I wanted that. I wanted to move back home with family and just be physically healthy again. I could barely eat any more. I was so weak I couldn’t even muster the strength to snow blow for several days after storms. I was a 30 year old man not even healthy enough to shovel or snow blow. Pitiful.
I’ve been sober 112 days now and things are so much better now it makes me want to cry tears of joy when I think about it. I’m now with family and always have their support right at hand. I run, hike, and exercise all the time when I could barely walk up a flight of stairs months ago. I thought I’d lose all my money and lose my career, but I sold my house with a profit and got a good job.
Today should be a damn good day. No challenges. I’m going to run, swim, grill, and lay in my hammock drinking lemonade. I’m going to relish every bit of it being lucid, clear, and sober. Have a great afternoon everyone (or morning or night in your part of the world). I read here every night and am hoping to post more often. See ya later.
In the last year and a half I was hospitalized several times for pancreatitis, gastritis, and alcoholic hepatitis. I went through three medical detoxes and spent numerous other nights in the ER being treated for dehydration or just being evaluated and sent on my way.
Having been turned away from the ER and already on the detox waiting list for weeks, I twice showed up claiming I was suicidal figuring it would force them to treat me for withdrawal. I was right about that and almost ended up in the psych ward before I decided to tell them I felt better and went home. I had thought about trying to break a leg or an arm to get treatment too, but figured I’d go into cardiac arrest and die an extremely foolish death. I was a train wreck.
My drinking caused me to lose my job and in the end I wanted that. I wanted to move back home with family and just be physically healthy again. I could barely eat any more. I was so weak I couldn’t even muster the strength to snow blow for several days after storms. I was a 30 year old man not even healthy enough to shovel or snow blow. Pitiful.
I’ve been sober 112 days now and things are so much better now it makes me want to cry tears of joy when I think about it. I’m now with family and always have their support right at hand. I run, hike, and exercise all the time when I could barely walk up a flight of stairs months ago. I thought I’d lose all my money and lose my career, but I sold my house with a profit and got a good job.
Today should be a damn good day. No challenges. I’m going to run, swim, grill, and lay in my hammock drinking lemonade. I’m going to relish every bit of it being lucid, clear, and sober. Have a great afternoon everyone (or morning or night in your part of the world). I read here every night and am hoping to post more often. See ya later.
Keep on keepin' on. 
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 19
Thank you everyone. I really appreciate all the positive comments here. This site has been extremely helpful and keeps me from losing focus on sobriety. I’m trying to be proactive and start posting before I have any big struggles.
I’m afraid of relapsing and I want to stay that way. I never want to stop being on guard and let myself give in and try drinking. I occasionally imagine (but don’t seriously consider) myself stopping at the liquor store on the way home from work, getting drunk for just one night. I have to play through all the consequences in my mind.
In seven years, getting drunk one night was never possible. It’s still hard to accept that I somehow can’t just endure one hangover without continuing to drink the next day, but I’ve proven it to myself time and time again that I can’t stop with just one drink or just one night.
I hope someday I no longer so much as imagine myself ever drinking. No matter how much stress or turmoil I might endure I want to learn how to get through it sober.
I’m afraid of relapsing and I want to stay that way. I never want to stop being on guard and let myself give in and try drinking. I occasionally imagine (but don’t seriously consider) myself stopping at the liquor store on the way home from work, getting drunk for just one night. I have to play through all the consequences in my mind.
In seven years, getting drunk one night was never possible. It’s still hard to accept that I somehow can’t just endure one hangover without continuing to drink the next day, but I’ve proven it to myself time and time again that I can’t stop with just one drink or just one night.
I hope someday I no longer so much as imagine myself ever drinking. No matter how much stress or turmoil I might endure I want to learn how to get through it sober.
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