Staying in the present
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 29
Staying in the present
Hi SR!
First - longtime reader, first time poster. I had signed up a few years ago in a previous sobriety attempt. This time around I have been reading here almost daily and it has been unbelievably helpful. I've got a little over a year of continuous sobriety and hope this sticks. I can't afford to go "back there" to that dark ugly place of active alcohol dependence and abuse, nor do I ever want to.
However...boy have I been fantasizing the drink lately. Maybe it has been this long harsh winter we just had. Also I think it could be that I'm planning a trip - I've had a great job (that I can show up for every day now that I'm not drinking!) for a year now and have some vacation time accrued. This trip is to my childhood home in another part of the country, that I never went back to since my family left 30 years ago. Many, many happy memories.
So this trip is 8 weeks away. Started planning it 2 weeks ago. It's great that it is something to look forward to and it puts me in a good mood just thinking about it. However I seem to also be obsessed about the countdown. Like, "OK - 54 more days. What if I drink? Can I make it?" I'm feeling super antsy and this leads me to fancying a drink, and we all know where "a drink" leads.
Anyways, just putting this out there helps. It's an odd phenomenon that would be good to know if others experience as well - looking forward to something, and almost getting obsessed about the "countdown". Talking to my therapist about it as well.
Thanks, SR
First - longtime reader, first time poster. I had signed up a few years ago in a previous sobriety attempt. This time around I have been reading here almost daily and it has been unbelievably helpful. I've got a little over a year of continuous sobriety and hope this sticks. I can't afford to go "back there" to that dark ugly place of active alcohol dependence and abuse, nor do I ever want to.
However...boy have I been fantasizing the drink lately. Maybe it has been this long harsh winter we just had. Also I think it could be that I'm planning a trip - I've had a great job (that I can show up for every day now that I'm not drinking!) for a year now and have some vacation time accrued. This trip is to my childhood home in another part of the country, that I never went back to since my family left 30 years ago. Many, many happy memories.
So this trip is 8 weeks away. Started planning it 2 weeks ago. It's great that it is something to look forward to and it puts me in a good mood just thinking about it. However I seem to also be obsessed about the countdown. Like, "OK - 54 more days. What if I drink? Can I make it?" I'm feeling super antsy and this leads me to fancying a drink, and we all know where "a drink" leads.
Anyways, just putting this out there helps. It's an odd phenomenon that would be good to know if others experience as well - looking forward to something, and almost getting obsessed about the "countdown". Talking to my therapist about it as well.
Thanks, SR
Court jester
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: South Florida
Posts: 508
Your first thoughts related to the countdown are "what if" statements. Take out a piece of paper and jot down a few alternative things you can say to yourself when you think about the trip. "54 days, this is going to be great!" "These next 54 days are going to be just like the past year and then I am taking a vacation!"
Change your thoughts and your feelings will follow in kind.
Change your thoughts and your feelings will follow in kind.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
I agree - change your thoughts.
The other thing is that maybe you start getting excited, and it can trigger some of the speedy brain feelings and increased heartrate that alcohol also brought on. Anxiety/excitement feel the same to the body.
The other thing is that maybe you start getting excited, and it can trigger some of the speedy brain feelings and increased heartrate that alcohol also brought on. Anxiety/excitement feel the same to the body.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 29
Possible trigger: this place was where i lived pre-drinking. Wonderful memories. After the move away, things changed - was never comfortable in the new locale & family dynamic changed - family members getting sick & passing away. Last thing I want to do on my trip is drink. It would ruin the trip.
Love the suggestions to change thinking. And yes, good point about anxiety & excitement being so similar. Anxiety was/is a known trigger. Makes total sense.
This is a good lesson in "one day at a time" for sure. Just keep doing the next right thing every day. Also going to try to focus on others more. Probably a good idea to hit more than one meeting a week again. Exercise helps as well.
Love the suggestions to change thinking. And yes, good point about anxiety & excitement being so similar. Anxiety was/is a known trigger. Makes total sense.
This is a good lesson in "one day at a time" for sure. Just keep doing the next right thing every day. Also going to try to focus on others more. Probably a good idea to hit more than one meeting a week again. Exercise helps as well.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
