shortimebenzo

Hi guys, I am new to this forum. I was ignorantly using of Valium at 10 mg for about 10 months.
About 12 days back I quit Cold Turkey(now I know it is not supposed to be good), the first 7-8 days were bad insomnia, heavy social anxiety, most of the stuff I had before I got on the drug..took off from work for those days. But the worst was yet to come as I started taking some 5-HTP/St.John's Wort supplements thinking they would help with the withdrawal. 3 days back, I had the worst case of racing thoughts which I managed to overcome with a walk and some cold medicine, also quit taking the supplements. Day before and yesterday were ok with the same aloof, negative feeling coming and going but lot less intensity.
A lot of emotions surface in and out and feel quite relaxed and perplexed on and off. I've been talking to friends and family very openly who have been very supportive..I've also been talking to them about lot of suppressed emotions which is really helping. I also heard from a friend that his wife came off a year of Ambien with almost no heavy withdrawal.
Can anyone with positive experience please share?

Thanks,
C

2stop

-C-

I have cold turkeyed off benzo's before...brutally unpleasant for sure. You really need to consult with your doctor about this. This type of w/d is very dangerous.

I made it through it all my cold turkeys...but the mental/emotional stuff lasted for quite awhile.I was bull headed and stubborn and never went to a doctor....regret not doing it now..could have helped me. Just hang in there, call the doctor, tell him the symptoms.....and I would suggest finding a support system/program of recovery. NA, SMART, check them all out..I use a little bit of everything.....LOL.....whatever works...is wonderful in my book. I was a pill addict for 20 years...mainly pain pills, but loved my downers too. I am clean today...and finally am experiencing freedom and joy in my life....my thoughts and prayers are with you.....don't give up on seeking help for this...what we seek we shall find...keep seeking. And keep posting...others will be along shortly to offer hope and encouragement....

(((((Warmest Hugs))))))

bikewench

Hey Shortie...

I have never used Valium... although I am a recovering addict around other substances.

Anytime we use to avoid dealing with negative emotions, behaviors or consequences... all it does is put life into "pause". And all that crap is waiting for us when we get clean and try to live life again.

Your in an excellent place to find answers. I'm sure someone with experience in your drug of choice will be along directly to share their experiences.

Welcome to SR...

shortimebenzo

Hi Tammie (oops i put in Soren before..i guess its the w/d) and bike. Thanks a lot for your support guys. Lot of prayers and wishes to you too. This experience has really made me realize first hand how much pain people go through, specially after visiting such forums. I just got done praying and begging for forgiveness....my symptoms are mostly psychological in nature so far..depression, insomnia and anxiety. Its another day off..really hoping to recover from this dump by myself. I bought the Valium on of the online sites without telling my doctor and so am scared of the implications. I also hope that my relatively small time and dosage work to my advantage.

bikewench

Hey again...

Well.. your not by yourself... your with us. ;o)

Are you familiar with Narcotics Anonymous Shorty? This is the link for the NA home page...
http://www.na.org/

There is also a substance abuse section on this board...
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...isplay.php?f=7

You might find some answers .. or realizations... that could help you continue to choose to stay off the benzo's.... and help you refrain from substituting one substance for another...

I sense that you realize your playing with fire... but our addicts are cunning , baffling , and powerful...

I hope you stick around here... share your journey....

I'm praying to the ALL that you will remain firm in your resolve to stay clean.

shortimebenzo

Bike, I am touched by your kindness..may God bless you. I will stick around and keep updated. People should never ever take these drugs..but I guess it's a learning experience, and most definitely a rewarding one for those who get cleaned up.

2stop

Good morning C-

How are you today?

Here's a ((((((((((Hug of Support)))))))))))) to get you started!

shortimebenzo

Good afternoon Tammie
I'm up and down. I read a few posts yesterday on the internet which were talking about the harms of quitting cold turkey and those thoughts were giving insomnia more than anything else..it scared the heck outta me. Do you know of any people who have been able to quit cold turkey without any prolonged effects? Lots of hugs to you too..

shortimebenzo

Somebody please tell me this crap reduces soon in few days. I've been up and down today..my windows of normality were ok..but every now and then the insanity comes and goes in varying levels. Why did I ever start on Valium!!

2stop

Have you seen your doctor? Please do, tell him everything.

I well remember the ups and down of benzo withdrawal..oh my.....like a hurrican bashing me against a mental minefield....violent. It does pass..but it is hard work.

Do you pray? Any spiritual principles you believe in? I find prayer/meditation helps alot. Deep breathing.........hot showers.......walking.
NA may be helpful for you..people to talk to who have been through the same/similar. Keep reaching out..vent/post.

Please do see your doctor though...very important. And have hope..that others have made it..YOU can too.

(((((((((((Warm, Supportive Hugs)))))))))))

shortimebenzo

Hi Tammie..yes I do pray very much..but the fear that its going to not subside is overwhelming. Does NA provide information about treatment centers? I bought the Valium over the internet without telling my doctor..is that ok?

2stop

I know...the fear is brutal....you don't know what way is up..but are pretty sure you are down for the count..it's okay.take a deep breathe......and another. sounds silly..but we don't breathe well when panicked.and it helps us think clearer to breathe. Okay...many people buy drugs off the internet...I don't think you are going to be in trouble for that. I came close to buying off ghe net..I was so mentally gone couldn't get past buying the membership thoing..could not figure out the rest of the process! Oh my..I felt for a long time I was a disgrace to addiction..couldn't even score! Thank GOD..my dad was a huge supplier of pils for me..he asked me today if I needed any pain pills..I said immediately NO! NO! NO! I share this because I want you to know you to can get to a place where you can say no to the valium, say no to ordering online...there IS hope....There are rehabs listed on here. Where do you live? Also your phone book yellow pages..NA may have some to suggest..I don't know..couldn't hurt to call and ask you know? Maybe could help talking to someone?

HUge HUgs coming your way...this WILL pass..keep reaching out...HELP is available.

hang in there, okay?