Trying again
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Buffalo NY
Posts: 3
Trying again
Hello all. This morning I have decided to again to quit drinking. I've been an alcoholic for 20 years, with maybe 3 2 or 3 month stints of sobriety. When I get under control, I convince myself that I'm OK and can drink socially, but it's always a slide back to maintenance drinking. My wife can drink socially, and all of our friends drink. When I have quit before, I didn't get the shakes or any symptoms of withdrawal, other than not knowing what to do with myself. My wife has made it clear that she will leave if I don't quit. We have 2 young children. I'm attending my first AA meeting on Saturday, but I thought this might be a good place to start for help.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Sober Soldier
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 1,911
Hi HanS0Lo,
I think it is important to remember that you keep trying, and as long as you keep doing that you are bound to find a solution eventually.
Like you, I was never physically dependent, and for that I feel very fortunate.
Have you considered seeking help to see if there is an underlying issue that is driving your drinking?
I think it is important to remember that you keep trying, and as long as you keep doing that you are bound to find a solution eventually.
Like you, I was never physically dependent, and for that I feel very fortunate.
Have you considered seeking help to see if there is an underlying issue that is driving your drinking?
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Welcome HanSOLO. You've made a great choice to stop drinking, I was in a similar situation myself. SR is definitely a great place to find support and supplement AA, or whatever method you choose. I also tried convincing myself that I could somehow eventually regain "control", and I tried every moderation plan known ( i even made up some of my own! ).
In the end though, the key was absolute acceptance of the fact that I can never, ever pick up that first drink without consequences. I hope you find that acceptance/honesty yourself - whether it be through AA, SR, or whatever means works for you. Your family will be very proud of you as well, you are making an excellent choice.
In the end though, the key was absolute acceptance of the fact that I can never, ever pick up that first drink without consequences. I hope you find that acceptance/honesty yourself - whether it be through AA, SR, or whatever means works for you. Your family will be very proud of you as well, you are making an excellent choice.
You'll find lots of support here. 
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Buffalo NY
Posts: 3
Originally Posted by mns1 
Hi HanS0Lo,
I think it is important to remember that you keep trying, and as long as you keep doing that you are bound to find a solution eventually.
Like you, I was never physically dependent, and for that I feel very fortunate.
Have you considered seeking help to see if there is an underlying issue that is driving your drinking?
I think it is important to remember that you keep trying, and as long as you keep doing that you are bound to find a solution eventually.
Like you, I was never physically dependent, and for that I feel very fortunate.
Have you considered seeking help to see if there is an underlying issue that is driving your drinking?
It has gotten to the point where I have started drinking on the way to work. I want to stop, but I rationalize things.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
Pleased to meet you Han. I'm so glad you found us and are ready to make this big change.
I tried to convince myself I could drink socially too. For decades. In the end, I was completely dependent on it and drinking all day. I never thought that could happen to me. You're doing the best possible thing for yourself by joining us and getting free of it.
I tried to convince myself I could drink socially too. For decades. In the end, I was completely dependent on it and drinking all day. I never thought that could happen to me. You're doing the best possible thing for yourself by joining us and getting free of it.
Sober Alcoholic
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 3,539
I'm not sure how much you're drinking but if you are drinking before work, it sounds like it might be enough to warrant a visit to your physician. Be very honest about how much you are drinking and follow the recommendations you receive exactly. Alcohol withdrawal can be nasty, and it can hurt you.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Buffalo NY
Posts: 3
I actually drink much less now than I did before. I was what you might call a weekend warrior, though I could easily put back 9-12 beers during a studio session. I closed my studio, so most recently I would have a drink or two after work, and a nightcap. On the weekends is when I would drink more heavily. The last time I quit for 3 months, I didn't have any physical problems. I'm hoping this time is the last time. Thanks for all the kind words.
Sober Soldier
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 1,911
Han, to me guilt of the past is like extra cargo that we can either lug around and let it hold us down, or we can dump it and move on.
None of that has to define you. It sounds like your family is very important to you and you want to be the best father you can be for them.
What action can you take now to be the person that you want to be?
None of that has to define you. It sounds like your family is very important to you and you want to be the best father you can be for them.
What action can you take now to be the person that you want to be?
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