Asmith

I'm only 15 days into this journey and have already failed one time. My clock started over on Wednesday. My BF says my drinking drove him to cheat online. I'm devastated. I knew I had a problem, but denied until the cows came home...or until the fat lady sang...whichever has happened. So I'm doing this alone. My support prefers to send dirty text messages to other women. I'm turning to you all. I need to find a new place to live. It's very stressful for me and would love to have that bottle beside me. I know that's not the right answer. It's just the one I'm used to. I must be strong now... But am feeling so weak! Ugh. One day at a time, right? I look forward to everyone's advice & support.

sugarbear1

stay strong, you can do this. YOU are worth it!

Move forward in your life, dump the cheater, there is no excuse for that behavior, let someone else have that kind of person in their life. You deserve better than that.

One day at a time, one minute at a time, you can stay stopped!

Copper442

Hey A, sounds like you have got your hands full at the moment. You made the right choice coming here. There is a lot of wonderful people here who truly want to see you succeed. Sometimes living minute to minute is all you can do and that is okay. You deserve better than how you've been treated and you deserve sobriety. Stick close to SR. We are all here for you.

SoberLeigh

Welcome, Asmith, to SR; glad you found us.

It will be so much easier to cope with life as a sober person. Your eyes, heart and mind will be so much clearer and will help you find a healthy living environment.

You will find support, encouragement and understanding here. Again, welcome.

Asmith

Thanks, all. I know I'm in a good place here. Wish I could wrap you around me as I try to survive these holidays... None of our parents know what's happening on any level. Merry Christmas! Oh by the way, our lives are changing forever. ((Tears))

SoberLeigh

SR is 24/7/365; there is always someone here who cares and truly wants to see you succeed.

Lean on us, Asmith.

Soberwolf

Welcome to SR Asmith youl find tons of support here

Turtle82

You have enough to deal with getting sober. Don't take responsibility for his decisions. Guilt trips are not going to help you. He had a multitude of options, some healthy and some not so much but the choice he made was his. I would venture to say that living with someone who beats you up like that would not help you get or stay sober. Time for you to break the "blame game" cycle.. huh? Good people here to help you on your path.

MidnightBlue

Hi, Asmith.

Welcome to SR!

Don't be afraid of anything!

I am 2 years and 2 months sober now. And at the beginning of my journey I was hell scared. Scared so much that i would be consumed and killed my tremendous pain from my past without being able to get numb with wine.

But... one day at a time, and I walked and worked through fear. A lot of us did.

You will do it too.

As for a cheater...Ah... Just recently I was engaged in crazy relationships. And one of the reasons it didn't work was because I don't drink. Kind of I can't understand that he has so much stress and needs to relax with beer. Yeah. Go figure what they want...

Take care of your sobriety. Everything else will fall in its place eventually.

Keep posting.

OklaBH

Oh dear Lord. You did not force him to create a profile, scour the internet, and meet up with someone and have sex. That is not you. If anything you could say to him "i'm drinking because youre a cheater" But, thats not reasonable either.

Once you get sober and have some time away from the drink you will have a new confidence and crap like that wont sit well with you.

That said, what is your plan to stay stopped? Stay close to SR its a great resource to stay sober.

Anna

We're here for you.

Remember that you didn't make your boyfriend cheat, nor did he make you drink. Now, you are strong enough to stop drinking and move out of a stressful situation. You will be able to find a new and peaceful place to live.

Thepatman

I'm confident that by kicking the Alcohol out of the picture all aspects in your life will improve. And you might kick something else out of your life in the process, or should I say someone.

Good luck, and please be kind to yourself on this Holliday. Happy Christmas

Dee74

Welcome Asmith - like others have said you did not make your bf cheat. That was his decision.

It is scary to begin again, but you can do it, Asmith....and you're not alone -

you just joined a very big family

D

tomsteve

I don't know if I sorry or not, but that whole your drinking caused him to cheat...that there's got me laughin!!! Please tell him I said its his lie and good luck with it!!!
I didn't have the best of morals at one time and am willing to guarantee his sick ass crap has been happening long before you 2 even got together.
Yer done with him. Throw out your ass kikin machine along with him.
" I knew I had a problem, but denied until the cows came home...or until the fat lady sang...whichever has happened"
How bout the cows came home, stepped on the fat lady and she sang?
And now her not in denial!!!
Yup, yer life's gonna change forever and that change is gonna be pretty dam good so long as ya stay sober. Getting sober is a bitch. Staying sobers pretty easy.
Yes, one day at a time. One minute at a time if necessary.

Yup, pretty good site here.mface to face support may not be a bad idea either.

How bout tellin us a lil more about ya? What got ya to a point in life alcohol became a problem?

Plure

Asmith,

Welcome to SR. I echo what others have said...totally lame, irresponsible, uncalled for, etc... for him to blame you for his cheating. The journey you are facing is a tough one and all of us feel the same struggle you are going through. Lean on us!!

Hevyn

Asmith - it's great to meet you! You just joined a wonderful family. We will help you through this.

Keep posting and reading - you'll find you are never alone. The understanding and support here is going to help you begin a new life. You can do this.