Chillly

Hi, Thanks for reading.
I've recently begun treatment for bipolar. Of course I was misdiagnosed as depression and anxiety for years. I'm also in the early stages of recovery from binge drinking.
I've been single for about 4/5 years now, and have lost my will to have romantic love.
Conveniently for me, my pattern of bar drinking has kept me satisfied with superficial attentions and intimacy with women for the last 3 years. Now that I am not drinking and going to bars to feed my need for attention from women, I have to evaluate my desires for meaningful relationships on a new level.

A few days ago, under the worst of circumstances, I met a woman.
BANG!!!
That's it folks.. I'm in love. I don't think I've ever felt so instantly infatuated with a woman like this in my entire life.
Directly after meeting her, I sat and spoke with her for about 4 hours. She was wonderful.
Unfortunately, I had to leave, and due to professional circumstances, was unable to act on my feelings.

Here's where it gets weird. As I sat in my apartment the day after meeting her, reconstructing every part of our conversation, and analyzing every detail of her every action and reaction. I came to a realization.
I'm being serious here.
About a year ago, I was heading a research and development project and was looking for funding. I was cold calling a variety of businesses for sponsorship opportunities and finding immediate rejection everywhere. Until I called one business. I live in a city with about 3.5 million people. When I randomly cold called this company (A very large nightclub downtown), I had decided to take a different approach to success. Instead of calling the main office, or the marketing department, I called teh bottle service department of the company. the woman that answered was unbelievably supportive and excited about my project, where all others had not been. I conversed with the woman about the project. I asked her about herself, and she volunteered where she was going to school, and what she was studying. I felt great speaking with her and ended the conversation by saying that I hope we meet someday. I thought nothing of it.
Back to the present.
This week when I was speaking with the object my new infatuation, she mentioned where she had gone to school, what she studied, when she had attended that school, and where she worked at the time. I mentioned to her about a project that I am currently working on, and she suggested to me that I call her old employer, as she had been in bottle service at the night club previously and facilitated a similar project funding about a year ago. (It was my project. Same Nightclub.....She was the one from the phone!!!.)
In the immediacy of the conversation, neither of us put together the connection that we were sitting as total strangers, a year later, in a different city, talking about an interaction we had over the phone a year earlier.
Whaaaat?
Here's the kicker. She has since graduated with a social work degree and now works at my psychiatrists office as a counselor for other clients. Not including me.

What do I do?
I feel such a strong connection right now, it literally physically compresses my chest.

Help! WHAAT?
I feel like if I tell her this story she'll think I'm crazy.

Dee74

I know you don't want to hear this but I'd take it really slow and easy Chilly.

You're 30 days out of a long addiction - your emotions are up and down...just diagnosed BPD.

I really recommend you work on yourself first for a bit - get yourself and your life in order before you start thinking of inviting someone to share it.

Slow your roll. There's nothing worse than meeting Ms Right at the wrong time.

assuming there's no rules against dating clients in the same office, if she is Ms Right, she'll wait.

D

PurpleKnight

The priority is to protect your Sobriety at all costs, whatever that takes, it took many of us a long time to eventually get Sober, and if that goes this woman won't fix that, it'll be you on your own having to pull yourself back from the abyss!!

So be careful and don't compromise on your Sobriety for anyone or anything!!

Croissant

You say you met her again under the worst if circumstances? What was that?

Chilly, I agree with what's been said. You probably don't want to hear this, but isn't this exactly a BPD response you are having? A high, high?

Sure, coincidental events happen, but to say you are in love, and to tell the girl, yes, she will most likely think you are crazy.

I've run into people in random places before, years later....and know of other stories like that. But, This is not a movie, this is real life, sometimes coincidences are just that, coincidences. They don't mean you are meant to be together.

Anna

Chilly, it could very well be that this relationship is meant to happen. But, for the time being you really need to stabilize yourself and focus on you. If it is truly meant to be, then it will happen but in the mean time you are taking care of yourself and your recovery.

Hollyanne

The People, Your People
Have
Spoken.
Listen.
Slow
Down.
Cute story, but slow down.
As said above, if she is Ms Right, she will be there in 12 months.

Thepatman

All of the above. Trust me, I dated with only a month in, I fell in love with feeling loved. Not healthy

Chillly

Well... Obviously I'm not in love for real? Infatuation is more apt I know. But doesn't love begin with infatuation sometimes?
Yes. This does sound like a classic BPD response to a coincidence.
I say it was the worst circumstance because she works at my psychiatrist office.
Sobriety first, I know.
Here's another kicker... She just finished a stint as a addictions counselor at the general hospital downtown..