Should I worry?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 349
Should I worry?
I seem to be able to stay sober about 3 days and then I drink again. I am wondering about withdrawls. I was sober last week, for three days, then drank 9 beers Wed. and Thur. and then sober for one day and then drank 9 beers Sat. and about 12 1/2 beers last night. Should I worry about withdrawls? Am I at the point where keeping drinking like this will be determental (sp?) to my health? I know none of you are doctors, but just from your experience I would like to know.
Today is my first day sober .... again. I keep doing this over and over and like I said, I can make it about 3 days and then something ... happens. I get depressed or lonely, or sometimes bored or tired and choose to drink. How do I get through those times that are holding me back from continuing to stay sober? It seems like this keeps happening and then the cycle starts all over. I really want to quit, just get to tired of not being "strong enough" I guess and then start having feelings that I want to drowned out with liquor. Advice?
Today is my first day sober .... again. I keep doing this over and over and like I said, I can make it about 3 days and then something ... happens. I get depressed or lonely, or sometimes bored or tired and choose to drink. How do I get through those times that are holding me back from continuing to stay sober? It seems like this keeps happening and then the cycle starts all over. I really want to quit, just get to tired of not being "strong enough" I guess and then start having feelings that I want to drowned out with liquor. Advice?
Its_me_jen
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
Welcome to SR Cecilia. I can't tell you if you'll have withdrawal or not, I have very little experience with that. The best thing to do is go see your doctor and be honest with her about your drinking and that you want to quit.
How do you stay strong enough? For me, I had to get face to face support. For me it's AA. There are other options as well. I also went to inpatient rehab. The support we get here at SR is invaluable but I had to have more, face to face.
I wasn't able to quit until I believed, to my inner most being, that I could not go on like I was. I wanted to not drink more than I did want to drink. One day at a time, things got better.
What is your plan?
How do you stay strong enough? For me, I had to get face to face support. For me it's AA. There are other options as well. I also went to inpatient rehab. The support we get here at SR is invaluable but I had to have more, face to face.
I wasn't able to quit until I believed, to my inner most being, that I could not go on like I was. I wanted to not drink more than I did want to drink. One day at a time, things got better.
What is your plan?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 349
I don't know if I have a plan. Being on here helps and I am glad I signed up. I need support. I have tried AA in the past and some of it was helpful and some not. I tend to be fairly shy and withdrawn, so I didn't make a ton of friends or anything. I was sober for 7 years prior to this, but have been drinking now for about another 7. I really WANT to quit, but I can't seem to hang onto hope for the future maybe. Like when I have a bad day, I just automatically give in and drink. I guess I don't know how to "ride out" my feelings without liquor. Makes me feel weak and like I haven't tried really hard. Maybe I haven't.
So my plan? I don't know. Being here and reading everyone's posts helps. I also go into AA chat on-line and sometimes that helps. Just some of the people in AA are such die hards about it that I don't always feel free to express myself. They tend to repeat "read the BB, work the steps," over and over and don't seem to say much else. It helps, some, but I think being here will help too.
So my plan? I don't know. Being here and reading everyone's posts helps. I also go into AA chat on-line and sometimes that helps. Just some of the people in AA are such die hards about it that I don't always feel free to express myself. They tend to repeat "read the BB, work the steps," over and over and don't seem to say much else. It helps, some, but I think being here will help too.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 819
For me, remembering how crappy I have felt works. Remove the alcohol, remove the shame, regret, guilt.....Keeping busy. Find something good to replace the bad. Keeping busy at the beginning is a big help. Exercise. Even a walk can help with the boredom and anxiety. And come here-read, post etc.....We are all in the same boat and we understand.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 3,293
If I were you, I'd check with your doctor before detoxing. I don't know what your experience has been with withdrawals, but I have had some nasty ones, so I wouldn't play around with it.
I don't know what outside resources you have where you live, but the last time I quit drinking, I really didn't have much hope in staying sober, and just figured I would keep riding this roller-coaster until the end came. I managed to get plugged into some outside group and individual therapy that has helped me a lot, and given me hope that things can be different.
As you probably know, alcohol is really not the problem. It's what causes you to drink in the first place that is the real issue. I've learned a lot about myself with the group I'm in, and has helped to give me more strength to stay away from the liquor store. It's still not easy, but it helps. To know why I drink makes all the difference.
Also, the first three or four days is the toughest. Get past that and you will feel better.
As far as AA is concerned, I stay away from the hard liners. I just go there for the message from others and a reminder of how bad it can be if I pick up again. Never made any friends there either, but I'm okay with that.
Hope things go better for you. John
I don't know what outside resources you have where you live, but the last time I quit drinking, I really didn't have much hope in staying sober, and just figured I would keep riding this roller-coaster until the end came. I managed to get plugged into some outside group and individual therapy that has helped me a lot, and given me hope that things can be different.
As you probably know, alcohol is really not the problem. It's what causes you to drink in the first place that is the real issue. I've learned a lot about myself with the group I'm in, and has helped to give me more strength to stay away from the liquor store. It's still not easy, but it helps. To know why I drink makes all the difference.
Also, the first three or four days is the toughest. Get past that and you will feel better.
As far as AA is concerned, I stay away from the hard liners. I just go there for the message from others and a reminder of how bad it can be if I pick up again. Never made any friends there either, but I'm okay with that.
Hope things go better for you. John
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 349
Thanks John. I liked your post. It's good to know that not everyone just loves AA either. And I am not saying they are bad, just the hardliners really drive me crazy.
I haven't had many issues with withdrawls, some, but not much. I think because I don't drink every day is why.
Yes, I know the reason I drink is not because of the alcohol itself. Matter of fact, I really don't even like getting drunk anymore. My reasons are more like I stated, boredom I think and lack of energy a lot of times to motivate myself into doing something else. I guess it takes some motivation for me to even go for a walk sometimes and drinking always seems available and easy. Pretty sad really. And lonliness, that happens fairly often to.
I would like to begin being more open for suggestions, so for anyone else who reads my post, please comment. All of the times I have tried to quit drinking I really haven't listened or taken others' advice. Now I am ready to. Please keep them coming.
I haven't had many issues with withdrawls, some, but not much. I think because I don't drink every day is why.
Yes, I know the reason I drink is not because of the alcohol itself. Matter of fact, I really don't even like getting drunk anymore. My reasons are more like I stated, boredom I think and lack of energy a lot of times to motivate myself into doing something else. I guess it takes some motivation for me to even go for a walk sometimes and drinking always seems available and easy. Pretty sad really. And lonliness, that happens fairly often to.
I would like to begin being more open for suggestions, so for anyone else who reads my post, please comment. All of the times I have tried to quit drinking I really haven't listened or taken others' advice. Now I am ready to. Please keep them coming.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,449
Originally Posted by sprout50 
For me, remembering how crappy I have felt works. Remove the alcohol, remove the shame, regret, guilt.....Keeping busy. Find something good to replace the bad. Keeping busy at the beginning is a big help. Exercise. Even a walk can help with the boredom and anxiety. And come here-read, post etc.....We are all in the same boat and we understand.
The memories of my last binge are enough to keep me sober right now, and this site. Just over 4 months now...
There aren't enough words to describe how awesome it is to wake up NOT feeling that horrible gamut of emotions that come with drinking. I certainly do not miss that.
I had a crap weekend sleep wise, like maybe 3 hrs the last 2 nights
waking up this morning at 5:30am for work was not fun...but I thought..this is still WAY better than waking up hungover!!!
Put a plan in action. Keep busy. Change habits/places. Post here.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,449
Originally Posted by Cecilia44
Thanks John. I liked your post. It's good to know that not everyone just loves AA either. And I am not saying they are bad, just the hardliners really drive me crazy.
Yes, I know the reason I drink is not because of the alcohol itself. Matter of fact, I really don't even like getting drunk anymore. My reasons are more like I stated, boredom I think and lack of energy a lot of times to motivate myself into doing something else. I guess it takes some motivation for me to even go for a walk sometimes and drinking always seems available and easy. Pretty sad really. And lonliness, that happens fairly often to.
I would like to begin being more open for suggestions, so for anyone else who reads my post, please comment. All of the times I have tried to quit drinking I really haven't listened or taken others' advice. Now I am ready to. Please keep them coming.
Yes, I know the reason I drink is not because of the alcohol itself. Matter of fact, I really don't even like getting drunk anymore. My reasons are more like I stated, boredom I think and lack of energy a lot of times to motivate myself into doing something else. I guess it takes some motivation for me to even go for a walk sometimes and drinking always seems available and easy. Pretty sad really. And lonliness, that happens fairly often to.
I would like to begin being more open for suggestions, so for anyone else who reads my post, please comment. All of the times I have tried to quit drinking I really haven't listened or taken others' advice. Now I am ready to. Please keep them coming.
Motivation - you said it. How motivated are you to quit? This is where change needs to happen. FORCE yourself to go for that walk instead of picking up a drink. Read some recovery literature - hell, read this site! You have to be willing to make some serious changes. I have Wine Rack that is literally in my grocery store. Wine was my poison. I see this store and am in it every single day. But I want to NOT drink bad enough that it doesn't phase me (most of the time)....do you have any support from family or friends?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 349
Jupiters,
Some support from family and friends I guess, but not a lot. My family knows I drink, my sister used to drink all the time too, just like me. But she sobered up and stayed that way and I did for about 7 years and now I am drinking again. It is hard to talk to my family about getting sober when they are not actively "in it" like I am. My Mom I talk to quite often, but she has never had a drinking problem so I am not sure if she really "gets it."
You guys and AA are my best support.
You are right about another thing Jupiter, and that is motivation. I seem to lack it when the decision to drink or not to drink is staring me in the face. I always drink instead of not drinking. How do I motivate myself?
Some support from family and friends I guess, but not a lot. My family knows I drink, my sister used to drink all the time too, just like me. But she sobered up and stayed that way and I did for about 7 years and now I am drinking again. It is hard to talk to my family about getting sober when they are not actively "in it" like I am. My Mom I talk to quite often, but she has never had a drinking problem so I am not sure if she really "gets it."
You guys and AA are my best support.
You are right about another thing Jupiter, and that is motivation. I seem to lack it when the decision to drink or not to drink is staring me in the face. I always drink instead of not drinking. How do I motivate myself?
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
Willpower and doing it on my own only got me so far, generally a few days here and there but then back to my old routine of drinking, the reason being my addictive mind was too strong for simply trying to resist the urge to drink, in isolation my mind could convince me to do anything, it wanted me to drink and would tell me all the reasons that I should, and so I did!!
I therefore needed something outside of myself, a system of support, something to give me a second opinion to what my mind was telling me I should do, something to short circuit my own thought processes.
No matter what it is, logging onto SR, meetings etc, very few can do this on willpower alone, continuing down the same path again and expecting the result of going further than 3 days isn't realistic, if sheer resistance isn't working now, it's not going to work the next time.
Tweak your plan and go at things again!! You can do this!!
I therefore needed something outside of myself, a system of support, something to give me a second opinion to what my mind was telling me I should do, something to short circuit my own thought processes.
No matter what it is, logging onto SR, meetings etc, very few can do this on willpower alone, continuing down the same path again and expecting the result of going further than 3 days isn't realistic, if sheer resistance isn't working now, it's not going to work the next time.
Tweak your plan and go at things again!! You can do this!!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 109
I remember thinking kind of the way you are....drinking regularly, feeling unwell and wondering to myself if this was bad. Of course it was damaging to my physical and mental health but in the grips of it I also wanted to think it was all okay...so I kept drinking and withdrawing and getting progressively sicker until I hit a wall. Maybe it's what they call 'rock bottom' but it became clear to me deep down inside that this was not okay and I was going to die. Drinking no longer had a single aspect of feeling good...it just made me feel sick. The choice was not really a choice anymore. My body and mind suddenly said, 'no more!'. I have been sick with post acute withdrawal for 6 weeks. It has included disabling panic, weakness, wobbly physical motor skills to name a few. But the certainty of ending drinking that comes with hitting rock bottom makes PAWS a welcome opportunity for a 2nd chance at life. I believe that once you answer your own question about whether your drinking habits are okay or not and that answer becomes 'no' from deep inside yourself then you be truly ready to change it. I wish you well and hope you find the answer that is best for you. Something tells me that if you are here and you are asking the question that somewhere inside you already have your answer.
Sober Sailor
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Everett, WA
Posts: 78
Getting and staying sober is not easy when we have drank for so long. I cannot give advice on withdrawals other then see your doctor, but I might be able to help with the 3 on 2 off you seem to be doing.
The first few times I tried to sober up and quit drinking I did the same thing, and it is emotionally hard. All I kept thinking was "why can't I stop", best thing I did was to ACCEPT that I couldn't stop without questioning WHY, and then deal with things as they came up. Cravings, triggers etc.
If you get a craving for alcohol, because of being bored, lonely or not caring, try replacing the alcohol with something sugary. Instead of drinking 9 beers, eat a bag of candy (I was partial to gummy bears/skittles while I was sobering up). They helped nip the cravings in the bud every time, and I still am not sure why haha.
The best way to keep motivated during sobriety is to journal out or just remember how crumby you felt while drinking, how miserable and out of control it made you feel. Then when you need some motivation re-read it or just recount all of those feelings.
Remember that life without alcohol is better then life with, for those of us who can't stop when we want to.
The first few times I tried to sober up and quit drinking I did the same thing, and it is emotionally hard. All I kept thinking was "why can't I stop", best thing I did was to ACCEPT that I couldn't stop without questioning WHY, and then deal with things as they came up. Cravings, triggers etc.
If you get a craving for alcohol, because of being bored, lonely or not caring, try replacing the alcohol with something sugary. Instead of drinking 9 beers, eat a bag of candy (I was partial to gummy bears/skittles while I was sobering up). They helped nip the cravings in the bud every time, and I still am not sure why haha.
The best way to keep motivated during sobriety is to journal out or just remember how crumby you felt while drinking, how miserable and out of control it made you feel. Then when you need some motivation re-read it or just recount all of those feelings.
Remember that life without alcohol is better then life with, for those of us who can't stop when we want to.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 349
Funny, I was sitting here feeling bad for drinking again and for once I actually changed how I felt. Part of the reason for drinking has been depression (why I started again) and it has been that way for a long time.
This time was different. I was about to have another pity party for myself and you know what? I stopped myself and said, no, I am not going to do it. I am tired of feeling depressed, lonely, sad, bad, upset about my life and my drinking. I do want to change and from now on a positive attitude is going to get me there.
I am signing up on the September thread. Thanks everyone.
This time was different. I was about to have another pity party for myself and you know what? I stopped myself and said, no, I am not going to do it. I am tired of feeling depressed, lonely, sad, bad, upset about my life and my drinking. I do want to change and from now on a positive attitude is going to get me there.
I am signing up on the September thread. Thanks everyone.
2Cor5:17
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Between Doctor's opinion & pg 164
Posts: 4,187
Dear Cecelia
Welcome to SR! Don't mean to hurt your feelings but worrying bout withdrawals is the least of problems. The reason most folks cannot stay sober or keep slipping is don't have God in their lives & have not surrendered to Him. Not talking of going to church or such things. We ran the show for years & look where it got us. Once I was done playing around & the pain plus consequences including waking every morning hating myself in the midst of hangovers & dt's, God was now ready to step in & take the reins. Today I love & accept myself coz I'm one person can never get away from. Working with a sponsor & group of guys helps me work my program & stay accountable. I believe the same can happen for you! Count yourself lucky coz there's millions out there who don't have the solution let alone know there's one, yet we do!
Best wishes
Welcome to SR! Don't mean to hurt your feelings but worrying bout withdrawals is the least of problems. The reason most folks cannot stay sober or keep slipping is don't have God in their lives & have not surrendered to Him. Not talking of going to church or such things. We ran the show for years & look where it got us. Once I was done playing around & the pain plus consequences including waking every morning hating myself in the midst of hangovers & dt's, God was now ready to step in & take the reins. Today I love & accept myself coz I'm one person can never get away from. Working with a sponsor & group of guys helps me work my program & stay accountable. I believe the same can happen for you! Count yourself lucky coz there's millions out there who don't have the solution let alone know there's one, yet we do!
Best wishes
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 341
Hi Cecelia,
I'm at the very beginning also so not much advice, but just wanted to say you sound just like me, 3 days, that was it. If I was really determined I might make it to 4 but it was kind of stupid because I would fight it on that 3'rd day knowing full well I would fail on day 4. Ugh, horrible cycle!!
I still believe willpower has a lot to do with stopping the cycle. I also tried to exercise a lot, eat right... I think when I felt good I was less likely to drink.
I drank to combat depression most of the time (crazy because it makes it worse), and right now I'm finally on an antidepressant, I can't drink on it so I feel the decision is out of my hands right now, a really good thing for me because I just couldn't stop the cycle.
Hang in there, this board has helped a lot too.
I'm at the very beginning also so not much advice, but just wanted to say you sound just like me, 3 days, that was it. If I was really determined I might make it to 4 but it was kind of stupid because I would fight it on that 3'rd day knowing full well I would fail on day 4. Ugh, horrible cycle!!
I still believe willpower has a lot to do with stopping the cycle. I also tried to exercise a lot, eat right... I think when I felt good I was less likely to drink.
I drank to combat depression most of the time (crazy because it makes it worse), and right now I'm finally on an antidepressant, I can't drink on it so I feel the decision is out of my hands right now, a really good thing for me because I just couldn't stop the cycle.
Hang in there, this board has helped a lot too.
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
When i got sober i would try anything like paperdoll said
i went to group therapy volentalry with ppl sent by the courts who didnt take it seriously i did i learnt how to meditate and im an inner city london man
i went to aa and learnt heaps but i dont hand things over and i dont work steps i do have faith tho
i seen a london street team that deals with alcoholics
i make regular apts with my doctor (this is vital)
i come on sr i volenteer from time to time
Dont let alcohol do this to you no more you can do it !
i went to group therapy volentalry with ppl sent by the courts who didnt take it seriously i did i learnt how to meditate and im an inner city london man
i went to aa and learnt heaps but i dont hand things over and i dont work steps i do have faith tho
i seen a london street team that deals with alcoholics
i make regular apts with my doctor (this is vital)
i come on sr i volenteer from time to time
Dont let alcohol do this to you no more you can do it !
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: midwest
Posts: 484
Originally Posted by Cecilia44
Am I at the point where keeping drinking like this will be determental (sp?) to my health?
Best of luck Cecilia, we are here for you!
-SC
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