Is this normal?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 14
Is this normal?
Normally I'd just stay off the internet and avoid worrying, cause I kind of already know the answer, but i need feedback to keep from going nuts. Im like 2 weeks in...ive cut back significantly over the last 6 months, dont drink every day, and when I do its only a few...but I was a heavier drinker before that often and heavier for quite a few years
Anyhow...this is why I struggle with this, is because when i cut back for good.. I feel like **** for up to a month, and then i just get back in the cycle
for example...im sitting here on a day off, trying to plan my day out...and I cant concentrate. im stuck in a state of anxiety...I dont want to leave the couch...but if I stay here any longer im going to go nuts. Cant concentrate, foggy, thoughts are kind of all over the place...almost like an out of body experience. Its terrifying
I dont want "meds"... that just adds to the problem for myself, as I have been treated for anxiety before and it made everything worse...or it alleviates some things, but just leads to more and more issues down the road. I want this to be over with once and for all. '
blahhh
Anyhow...this is why I struggle with this, is because when i cut back for good.. I feel like **** for up to a month, and then i just get back in the cycle
for example...im sitting here on a day off, trying to plan my day out...and I cant concentrate. im stuck in a state of anxiety...I dont want to leave the couch...but if I stay here any longer im going to go nuts. Cant concentrate, foggy, thoughts are kind of all over the place...almost like an out of body experience. Its terrifying
I dont want "meds"... that just adds to the problem for myself, as I have been treated for anxiety before and it made everything worse...or it alleviates some things, but just leads to more and more issues down the road. I want this to be over with once and for all. '
blahhh
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
Welcome Royce!
For alcoholics, (me ) moderation or attempts at this endeavor are fruitless. I had to quit - be done, cast it out. I had to find the way to relieve my obsession of the mind that lead to the first drink and ergo the physical cravings.
Each individual who chooses that path has to deal with their own body chemistry. A doctor should be involved in the process for many. That is your decision as well.
When I got to around 30 days, things got much, much better - that's just me. Everyone's experience is different of course.
So glad you have found SR ( me too !! )
peace to you on your journey - sobriety is so worth the work!
For alcoholics, (me ) moderation or attempts at this endeavor are fruitless. I had to quit - be done, cast it out. I had to find the way to relieve my obsession of the mind that lead to the first drink and ergo the physical cravings.
Each individual who chooses that path has to deal with their own body chemistry. A doctor should be involved in the process for many. That is your decision as well.
When I got to around 30 days, things got much, much better - that's just me. Everyone's experience is different of course.
So glad you have found SR ( me too !! )
peace to you on your journey - sobriety is so worth the work!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 14
I feel like im losing my mind
Its one of those things, if I had some assurance that in "3 months you'll feel good" I'd stick with it...which I plan to
The scariest thing for me is that Ill get to that point, and this will all be the same. A lot of that is just from my struggles in the past trying to stay sober...specifically recently when i went a month and still didn't really find a lot of relief for my situation
Its one of those things, if I had some assurance that in "3 months you'll feel good" I'd stick with it...which I plan to
The scariest thing for me is that Ill get to that point, and this will all be the same. A lot of that is just from my struggles in the past trying to stay sober...specifically recently when i went a month and still didn't really find a lot of relief for my situation
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
When I got past that first month, things got markedly better.
You've messed up your body, man. It takes time. It is so worth it. The anxiety I always had? Gone. Depression, crippling fears? Out.
Alcohol really wreaks havoc in the body and the Central Nervous System. You are going to feel amazing. Hang in there. Stay busy. Eat ice cream, sleep, exercise, drink lots of water - repeat.
You've messed up your body, man. It takes time. It is so worth it. The anxiety I always had? Gone. Depression, crippling fears? Out.
Alcohol really wreaks havoc in the body and the Central Nervous System. You are going to feel amazing. Hang in there. Stay busy. Eat ice cream, sleep, exercise, drink lots of water - repeat.
Hillbilly Girl
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: In my Garden
Posts: 3,953
For me, the more sobriety I have, the less the anxiety. The #1 reducer of anxiety for me, & recommended by health professionals for anxiety is exercise. Even a brisk walk outside can help a lot. Great job on 2 weeks!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
What else are you trying to do to help yourself besides just not drinking? When I quit there was a huge void that needed filling. And life is life. Take away the alcohol and I'm still just me with all the same worries and issues, just minus the alcohol. I had to find and keep working on ways to address those things minus the alcohol.
And as long as I entertained in the back of my mind the thought that I could moderate, That at some point I could have one or a few, I was miserable because I tortured myself with the thoughts of when I could have one, how many I would have, this time it would be different. Still planning my life around consuming poison instead of planning a fulfilling life. Until my life became living centered instead of centered around alcohol and if, how much, when and where, I remained miserable. I could never moderate and even now that I have nine months if I have an urge to drink it is never, ever with the thought that I would have a mere one and be done but wholesale, blinding drunkenness.
I felt good at three months only because I said never again and not maybe sometime. No one of us can promise anything because everyone's recovery is different but most people on here with some time would probably say that their worst days at three months sober still beat their best days while drinking.
Hang in there. Start adding things to take care of yourself. It can be done but it does take some work.
And as long as I entertained in the back of my mind the thought that I could moderate, That at some point I could have one or a few, I was miserable because I tortured myself with the thoughts of when I could have one, how many I would have, this time it would be different. Still planning my life around consuming poison instead of planning a fulfilling life. Until my life became living centered instead of centered around alcohol and if, how much, when and where, I remained miserable. I could never moderate and even now that I have nine months if I have an urge to drink it is never, ever with the thought that I would have a mere one and be done but wholesale, blinding drunkenness.
I felt good at three months only because I said never again and not maybe sometime. No one of us can promise anything because everyone's recovery is different but most people on here with some time would probably say that their worst days at three months sober still beat their best days while drinking.
Hang in there. Start adding things to take care of yourself. It can be done but it does take some work.
Magsie
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,683
Hi Royce, unfortunately there's not a quick fix for us so have to go through the anxieties, cravings etc. and it is different for each and every one of us. I know one thing, keep moving forward and it does get better.
Initially, no more hangovers, red faces, swelling of ankles, working hungover, foggy brains. That is a plus in itself. My emotions were all over the place when I stopped drinking.
I was well advised from my SR friends not to make any life changing decisions in the first year and I didn't and still haven't. But my head is getting a clearer picture of life.
Take one day, one hour, one step at a time, we tend to romance our addiction to ourselves and forget all the problems it brings in the cold light of day.
Initially, no more hangovers, red faces, swelling of ankles, working hungover, foggy brains. That is a plus in itself. My emotions were all over the place when I stopped drinking.
I was well advised from my SR friends not to make any life changing decisions in the first year and I didn't and still haven't. But my head is getting a clearer picture of life.
Take one day, one hour, one step at a time, we tend to romance our addiction to ourselves and forget all the problems it brings in the cold light of day.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,512
Yes, there is no quick fix and it takes a lot of work to navigate through early recovery.
It's important to keep in mind that just stopping drinking will not be enough. Most of us have to make big changes in our lives to accommodate a sober lifestyle.
You will feel better as time goes by.
It's important to keep in mind that just stopping drinking will not be enough. Most of us have to make big changes in our lives to accommodate a sober lifestyle.
You will feel better as time goes by.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 14
Originally Posted by Mags1 
Hi Royce, unfortunately there's not a quick fix for us so have to go through the anxieties, cravings etc. and it is different for each and every one of us. I know one thing, keep moving forward and it does get better.
Initially, no more hangovers, red faces, swelling of ankles, working hungover, foggy brains. That is a plus in itself. My emotions were all over the place when I stopped drinking.
I was well advised from my SR friends not to make any life changing decisions in the first year and I didn't and still haven't. But my head is getting a clearer picture of life.
Take one day, one hour, one step at a time, we tend to romance our addiction to ourselves and forget all the problems it brings in the cold light of day.
Initially, no more hangovers, red faces, swelling of ankles, working hungover, foggy brains. That is a plus in itself. My emotions were all over the place when I stopped drinking.
I was well advised from my SR friends not to make any life changing decisions in the first year and I didn't and still haven't. But my head is getting a clearer picture of life.
Take one day, one hour, one step at a time, we tend to romance our addiction to ourselves and forget all the problems it brings in the cold light of day.
Part of me wants to be like "hold up...dont do anything crazy" and the other part of me just cant take the job anymore and what it offers and is. It stinks because it pays good and is stable...i just dont know if I can force myself to go back in there or not with the problems ive been having over the last year
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Originally Posted by royce99
Its one of those things, if I had some assurance that in "3 months you'll feel good" I'd stick with it..
Sobriery is a lifestyle, not a cure, for alcoholism. Sometimes it takes months, or even years to recover and adjust. The possible rewards far outweigh the work to attain it in my opinion. And as mentied already, simply not drinking is not sobriety. It is work that you need to do every day, hard work. You won't like some of it and you will need to do things you are uncomfortable with. But it is attainable for Anyone if they want it enough.
Magsie
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,683
Royce, I know when I was drinking every problem, be it at work or home or wherever was such a mountain rather than what it was, just life but I built it up because, unbeknowingly I wasn't functioning on all cylinders or brain cells because they where fogged up most of the time, even when sober.
I get a clearer picture of everything, like my antenna is facing the correct way and receiving all the right signals. I've still got a long way to go, personally, but it is becoming better.
Hopefully you have another job if you are unhappy at this one. You say it's good pay and shift work, and sometimes better the devil we know, as the saying goes.
I'm sure you will make the right decision for yourself when you weigh up the pros and cons. Be well and keep posting and reading. I've met the most helpful and amazing people here and gleaned some insights and experiences I couldn't have got if I'd paid for infact I didn't get when I paid for help.
I get a clearer picture of everything, like my antenna is facing the correct way and receiving all the right signals. I've still got a long way to go, personally, but it is becoming better.
Hopefully you have another job if you are unhappy at this one. You say it's good pay and shift work, and sometimes better the devil we know, as the saying goes.
I'm sure you will make the right decision for yourself when you weigh up the pros and cons. Be well and keep posting and reading. I've met the most helpful and amazing people here and gleaned some insights and experiences I couldn't have got if I'd paid for infact I didn't get when I paid for help.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 14
I appreciate the words guys. Its really frustrating...because I cant tell you how many times ive said "ok...well Ill make this change and then things will be good to go"...but they never are. A lot of that has to do with going back to that lifestyle of drinking...u switch ure situation, but if ure still engaging in that all the time, u dont even have a chance to reap any benefits
Im scared to make changes because they dont ever seem to work...the last thing I have to change is to get permanently sober, and i've been putting that off for god knows how long. Ive been dealing with recovering from multiple surgeries on my knee...and needless to say thats taken a toll on me that I've pretty much just repressed. Im trying to get better from that. Im definitely someone that seeks "immediate gratification" and I have all the makings of an addict with my personality traits and underlying anxiety issues anyhow. Having my physical health being jacked up has really affected me.
Im just in a really bad spot right now, and ive been trying to "hold strong" now for the last 3 years with the injuries, and things just havent gotten better..and the drinking isnt helping
Im scared to make changes because they dont ever seem to work...the last thing I have to change is to get permanently sober, and i've been putting that off for god knows how long. Ive been dealing with recovering from multiple surgeries on my knee...and needless to say thats taken a toll on me that I've pretty much just repressed. Im trying to get better from that. Im definitely someone that seeks "immediate gratification" and I have all the makings of an addict with my personality traits and underlying anxiety issues anyhow. Having my physical health being jacked up has really affected me.
Im just in a really bad spot right now, and ive been trying to "hold strong" now for the last 3 years with the injuries, and things just havent gotten better..and the drinking isnt helping
EndGame
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 4,677
I'm not a sloganeer, but I used to hear people in AA say something like, "Move a muscle, change a feeling." I'm also not big on "changing feelings," nor am I a "TipsNTricks" guy, but I do appreciate the simple message of this slogan.
If your knee restricts your movement, and you can't go for a walk, then take a ride on a (different kind of) roller coaster, make egg salad (don't know where that came from), visit a zoo (or a pet shop), set up a telescope near a window (facing skyward)...something.
If your knee restricts your movement, and you can't go for a walk, then take a ride on a (different kind of) roller coaster, make egg salad (don't know where that came from), visit a zoo (or a pet shop), set up a telescope near a window (facing skyward)...something.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: New England
Posts: 4,420
Royce-
The first month was a little ridiculous, now that I look back on it. I was anxious, lethargic, addle-brained. At times, I thought I may be going insane, my short-term memory was so bad. But, I wasn't. It's back now, even though I notice when I'm stressed out, it can be a little less reliable than usual. Even that is getting better, though.
Just hang in there and distract yourself by doing something out of the usual, I began running errands after work, cleaning out closets, having long talks on the phone with my family- all things I would never have done while drinking.
The best advice is to just stop. Give your body time to get better, and it will.
The first month was a little ridiculous, now that I look back on it. I was anxious, lethargic, addle-brained. At times, I thought I may be going insane, my short-term memory was so bad. But, I wasn't. It's back now, even though I notice when I'm stressed out, it can be a little less reliable than usual. Even that is getting better, though.
Just hang in there and distract yourself by doing something out of the usual, I began running errands after work, cleaning out closets, having long talks on the phone with my family- all things I would never have done while drinking.
The best advice is to just stop. Give your body time to get better, and it will.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 14
Originally Posted by VikingGF
Royce-
The first month was a little ridiculous, now that I look back on it. I was anxious, lethargic, addle-brained. At times, I thought I may be going insane, my short-term memory was so bad. But, I wasn't. It's back now, even though I notice when I'm stressed out, it can be a little less reliable than usual. Even that is getting better, though.
Just hang in there and distract yourself by doing something out of the usual, I began running errands after work, cleaning out closets, having long talks on the phone with my family- all things I would never have done while drinking.
The best advice is to just stop. Give your body time to get better, and it will.
The first month was a little ridiculous, now that I look back on it. I was anxious, lethargic, addle-brained. At times, I thought I may be going insane, my short-term memory was so bad. But, I wasn't. It's back now, even though I notice when I'm stressed out, it can be a little less reliable than usual. Even that is getting better, though.
Just hang in there and distract yourself by doing something out of the usual, I began running errands after work, cleaning out closets, having long talks on the phone with my family- all things I would never have done while drinking.
The best advice is to just stop. Give your body time to get better, and it will.
Magsie
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,683
Royce, I drank for any excuse in the world, feeling happy, feeling sad, it was a Monday it was the weekend, wind blowing in the wrong way. I did 10 miles on the running machine, I didn't do 10 miles etc etcetera etcetera . Do you get my drift.
You have to want to stop to stop. If you listen and give in to your inner child you will make excuses forever.
If you've had surgery and anaesthetic it isn't wise to drink also, your head could be all over the place.
You have to want to stop to stop. If you listen and give in to your inner child you will make excuses forever.
If you've had surgery and anaesthetic it isn't wise to drink also, your head could be all over the place.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,075
Originally Posted by royce99
Its one of those things, if I had some assurance that in "3 months you'll feel good" I'd stick with it...which I plan to
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 14
Originally Posted by Mags1
Royce, I drank for any excuse in the world, feeling happy, feeling sad, it was a Monday it was the weekend, wind blowing in the wrong way. I did 10 miles on the running machine, I didn't do 10 miles etc etcetera etcetera . Do you get my drift.
You have to want to stop to stop. If you listen and give in to your inner child you will make excuses forever.
If you've had surgery and anaesthetic it isn't wise to drink also, your head could be all over the place.
You have to want to stop to stop. If you listen and give in to your inner child you will make excuses forever.
If you've had surgery and anaesthetic it isn't wise to drink also, your head could be all over the place.
But I hear you...my inner child is strong inside of me...trying to make excuses and looking for the easy way out
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