Day...7 update
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 14
Day...7 update
Little about me...I was on anxiety medication (lexapro) for awhile...years, and I was a functional alcoholic while I was on it. Id drink every single night, normally a 6 pack, but def at times more, and on the weekends always more...I did this for years. Eventually i linked the lexapro my drinking (drinking because I didnt feel like myself on the meds)...long story, but I opted to quit. But then I destroyed my leg which sent me down another long ass road and surgeries...and weird symptoms, i dont even care to talk about
Legs starting to finally look up (a little, not a lot). I cut back on the drinking over the last year...but I do still binge drink to deal with some of the emotional pain from my leg. I quit for about a month before, but it was early in my recovery from my leg, and even after a month I didnt feel any better...it was just too much to really take in with how jacked up my body was.
Anyway, im trying again, and im a little further in my recovery, so maybe this will work better this time. My goal is to be sober...and healthy again, and then to work on my anxiety straight on and not hide behind anything.
But...night 7 for me. Fatigue. Im definitely depressed, its a combo of my leg, how i dont feel like myself, and then my body trying to recover from all the alcohol ive drank over the last...10 years. Body doesnt understand what im doing to it. I cant sleep...but im tired all the time. I feel like my eyes are heavy when I wake up and I feel like that all throughout the day. Theres times I get kind of confused where Im at...i was at the grocery store today, and ive had to catch myself like "wait...what am I doing, where am i at" This has happened a lot actually over the the last few...im apparently not responding well to the injury/trying to get sober. Body is just confused and my brain is just jacked up
Im not giving up hope...I still think theres a life for me, but its going to have to be sober. I want to live...i want to develop, build on myself, be someone. I dont want to do it on lexapro or alcohol. I hope this works
Legs starting to finally look up (a little, not a lot). I cut back on the drinking over the last year...but I do still binge drink to deal with some of the emotional pain from my leg. I quit for about a month before, but it was early in my recovery from my leg, and even after a month I didnt feel any better...it was just too much to really take in with how jacked up my body was.
Anyway, im trying again, and im a little further in my recovery, so maybe this will work better this time. My goal is to be sober...and healthy again, and then to work on my anxiety straight on and not hide behind anything.
But...night 7 for me. Fatigue. Im definitely depressed, its a combo of my leg, how i dont feel like myself, and then my body trying to recover from all the alcohol ive drank over the last...10 years. Body doesnt understand what im doing to it. I cant sleep...but im tired all the time. I feel like my eyes are heavy when I wake up and I feel like that all throughout the day. Theres times I get kind of confused where Im at...i was at the grocery store today, and ive had to catch myself like "wait...what am I doing, where am i at" This has happened a lot actually over the the last few...im apparently not responding well to the injury/trying to get sober. Body is just confused and my brain is just jacked up
Im not giving up hope...I still think theres a life for me, but its going to have to be sober. I want to live...i want to develop, build on myself, be someone. I dont want to do it on lexapro or alcohol. I hope this works
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 57
Sorry to hear about your troubles with the leg, sounds hard for you emotionally. I just wanted to say that when I have stopped drinking for say one week, I'm only good for sleeping and working. I think I just need so much healing for my body, and sleep is the best thing at first. I'm glad because when I'm "up" I'm ready to go into that almost manic state of drinking where I am just throwing wine down my throat to make up for lost time, or to get to my happy place quickly. It was nights like that I would drink the most and make foolish phone calls. I'm embracing the sleep and rest (though its harder with a 3 year old I admit) as much as possible. I think sleep is our friend for now! I'ts the whole can't get out of bed because I'm depressed feeling that is unhealthy. For me I'm going to talk to my Dr about that and decide what to do but for the time being I'm trying to stay calm and relaxed and away from stressors!
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