A good conversation
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Leeds
Posts: 399
A good conversation
So the other day, while I was out. I started talking to a girl about books in a coffee shop, we ended up talking for an hour or so before she left and I also talked to her friends who joined her. It was a lot of fun.
This doesn't sound like a big deal.
What you have to realise is that for years my social ability (for lack of a better term) was ruined by drinking. Perhaps it was the anxiety, perhaps it's that I plain looked a mess or maybe I was just slow witted from the booze, as well as having a chip on my shoulder because I blamed others for my problems. It's probably a little of all of those things.
I haven't made any friends in years, I barely talk to people other than when I have some kind of "official" reason to (job interviews, that sort of thing). So this feels like a little breakthrough for me. Little by little, getting myself back.
This doesn't sound like a big deal.
What you have to realise is that for years my social ability (for lack of a better term) was ruined by drinking. Perhaps it was the anxiety, perhaps it's that I plain looked a mess or maybe I was just slow witted from the booze, as well as having a chip on my shoulder because I blamed others for my problems. It's probably a little of all of those things.
I haven't made any friends in years, I barely talk to people other than when I have some kind of "official" reason to (job interviews, that sort of thing). So this feels like a little breakthrough for me. Little by little, getting myself back.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: FL
Posts: 16
That is an amazing accomplishment. I bet it feels great. Reading your experience is really inspiring to me. I struggle with social anxiety but hope being sober I can change that and it's exciting to read how you're getting yourself back. Way to go! 
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
I relate to you, MrBen. Your "social life" while drinking sounds a lot like mine... maybe I had to still interact with colleagues and about work-related stuff more as I had been part of a large team, but I did just what was the minimum acceptable (?? not with my standards...) in that as well, sadly. I had a girlfriend with whom initially we lived together in my apartment, but after a while I made up an excuse that I wanted to move to a different neighborhood, just to part from the domestic relationship so that I could drink easily alone.
Exceptions from the rule were my crazy virtual world adventures and "friendships"... but there was nothing healthy about those.
I'm very glad to hear you are opening up to normal social interactions now. Me too
It certainly feels great. I am a true interesting-conversation lover, it's actually one of the things I appreciate in life the most. Addiction is really evil to destroy our best features...
Congrats on your progress!
Exceptions from the rule were my crazy virtual world adventures and "friendships"... but there was nothing healthy about those.
I'm very glad to hear you are opening up to normal social interactions now. Me too
It certainly feels great. I am a true interesting-conversation lover, it's actually one of the things I appreciate in life the most. Addiction is really evil to destroy our best features...
Congrats on your progress!
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,576
Very glad to hear this MrBen.
I found that drinking made clam up and isolate. When I first started to drink it seemed to have the opposite affect, but in the end it was crippling me.
I found that drinking made clam up and isolate. When I first started to drink it seemed to have the opposite affect, but in the end it was crippling me.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
