hj003

Hey all,

I've been an obnoxious member of this forum with various identities and temporary email addresses from time to time. This was done in a drunken stupor and I hope you can forgive me.

Underneath it was the desire to quit drinking but also resistance to it. Which resulted in my behavior.

Btw, I'm using my real e-mail address right now and am not using VPN, so this is me.

I need to quit. And I will. I just need to learn how to do it.

So this is my intro.

hj

PurpleKnight

Welcome back hj003!!

Gonnachange

I'm a newbie here so you likely have more experience and knowledge of SR than I do. You know that the support and advice is unconditional so keeping coming here when you need it.

Wishing you well.

ScottFromWI

Welcome HJ. The past is done - glad you are here today. How can we help?

SoberLeigh

Welcome, HJ.

hj003

Thanks to you all. Scott, I'm not sure yet how you can help. I'm quitting tomorrow and will have to see how that affects me. So I'll post if there's something I come across that is a challenge.

ScottFromWI

Reading here helped me tremendously early on. Asking a lot of questions did too. Don't worry if they've been asked before, we'll answer them again!

I would add - why not start today? I planned to quit "tomorrow" dozens of times but tomorrow never came.

hj003

I just asked myself that same question Scott. There's beer in the fridge. I can't make myself to throw it out. I just have to drink it.

Fortunately there are only a few cans left. But this inability to say no to it and throw the rest out baffles me. Though it's likely that the fact that I'm already drunk makes it so I just drink them.

Added to that, I have set my mind to tomorrow. Drink today for the last time, from tomorrow on I will be sober.

This does not make any rational sense, I know. But well, if it leads to me being sober from tomorrow and on, I suppose it's not too much of a disaster.

ScottFromWI

OK, let me ask you this then. What will be different tomorrow? If you can't stop drinking today, what exactly is it you are going to do to stop tomorrow?

hj003

Tomorrow I will be out of my current supply of alcohol. So there will be nothing left.

hj003

I'm starting to black out and will be back tomorrow.

Hevyn

I'm glad you came back hj.

I hope you'll return tomorrow and continue the discussion. We care about you and want to help.

Wastinglife

I was an obnoxious drunk out in the real world hj003. I came here for sanctuary. No judgement here. This place works better when you're sober though haha. Welcome back.

least

Welcome back!

hj003

Thanks for all the nice welcome messages.

Today is day 1. I just woke up, it's 12 noon over here. Hung over but also with a huge sense of relief. Relieved about the fact that I will never have to go through that again. I think I still have some alcohol in my system since I drank a whole lot, went to bed very late and even though it's 12 noon, didn't get much sleep.

But that'll wear off. I'm curious about how the withdrawal will go. I'm hoping it's mild. I'm not going to see a doctor right away, but I will call them as soon as something happens that I don't trust.

Even though I'm hung over, I feel pretty good. Free would be the right word. I feel free.

SoberLeigh

Keep posting, HJ; rooting for you.

Freedom from that monster we know as alcohol is amazing.

ScottFromWI

Glad you are making this Day 1. Withdrawal effects everyone differently, some just feel crappy for a few days, for others it can be very severe - even life threatening in rare occurrences. Do you have someone nearby that can call for help or keep an eye on you should you become incapacitated?

hj003

I have people around most of the time so if something happens, they can call for help.

So far I'm not noticing much fortunately. Usually I would have been drunk for a few hours by now. But I'm only noticing a bit of fatigue and some sweating.

I decided to not just quit drinking but to turn my life around. With the drinking came a poor diet. So today I ate healthy. Some salmon, fruit, vegetables, potatoes, milk, enough water, bread. That made me feel so good. I've denied my body nutrients for so long and poured poison in it all the time, the shift to consuming healthy foods really gave me a boost.

I'll see what happens. And if something serious happens, someone will be around to help me.

Cleomie

Good luck to you hj003. Today's my first day too and I'm just praying it "takes" this time. I want to feel free from this vice also.

hj003

Good luck to you as well Cleomie!