Feeling stuck
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 3
Feeling stuck
So, I'm in a dilemma where I've been living with my boyfriend for about 7 months. Lately, I have become obsessively focused on my boyfriend's recreational drug use to the point where i'm not focusing on myself anymore. I'm okay with him smoking pot occasionally, or with me, but now I think it's like everyday.
Also, his passion is music, and along that comes other use of drugs that he uses recreationally. I've told him numerous times that I'm uncomfortable with his lifestyle, especially because i've had a family member who was addicted to drugs. He justifies it by saying how he's responsible, not a deadbeat, and never gets out of control. I've told him that to consider him in my future and possibly the future father of my kids, i don't want to see him doing that. Months ago he said he would stop doing harder drugs at concerts for me. But now I've become obsessed with checking his text messages and emails with friends about doing psychedelic drugs, among other stuff, and how he needs to keep it on the down-low around me. I feel betrayed, and i can't approach him anymore about this because we just go in circles. I'm not sure how to just accept it and not make a big deal about it, and focus on making myself happy. I honestly don't think i'm ready to move out.
Also, his passion is music, and along that comes other use of drugs that he uses recreationally. I've told him numerous times that I'm uncomfortable with his lifestyle, especially because i've had a family member who was addicted to drugs. He justifies it by saying how he's responsible, not a deadbeat, and never gets out of control. I've told him that to consider him in my future and possibly the future father of my kids, i don't want to see him doing that. Months ago he said he would stop doing harder drugs at concerts for me. But now I've become obsessed with checking his text messages and emails with friends about doing psychedelic drugs, among other stuff, and how he needs to keep it on the down-low around me. I feel betrayed, and i can't approach him anymore about this because we just go in circles. I'm not sure how to just accept it and not make a big deal about it, and focus on making myself happy. I honestly don't think i'm ready to move out.
I honestly don't think i'm ready to move out.
I hope you're ready to move out before you have kids with this man. Dating an addict, much less living with one, is unpredictable and not much fun. I hope you can move on and make a life for yourself. Having to check his communication means you're playing detective, not girlfriend. Are you ready for a lifetime of this?
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Gatineau, QC, CA
Posts: 5,100
Not sure if this will help but I think if he is in denial, you should start thinking about the simple truth of life. It is short. Specially if you want to bring little ones in this world.
Best to you, I know this must not be easy. I'm sitting on the other side of the fence, I am an Alcoholic. Leaving might be what he needs to wake up.
One thing for sure, think about you
Best to you, I know this must not be easy. I'm sitting on the other side of the fence, I am an Alcoholic. Leaving might be what he needs to wake up.
One thing for sure, think about you
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