sponsor trouble
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NC
Posts: 1,737
Originally Posted by kellygurl1711 
I'm having a huge pity party for myself right now. Gahhhh! I just feel like I'm going to explode!! Too. Many. Feelings. I'm overwhelmed with sobriety and everything it entails. Life was simpler before yet also completely out of control. Now it's just the same except I'm sober and feel healthier. Maybe I'm making to many changes too fast? I changed my sleep patterns[i now wake up at 7am instead of 2pm] i changed my eating habits, i exercise for at last 30mins a day now. Ask of these things have changed in the past 12 days. And now I'm venting on the internet. I feel like crying even tho most off these changes are good ones.
Most of all, be gentle on yourself.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Chicago suburbs
Posts: 46
I've realized i was just scared to start the steps of recovery. It wouldn't have mattered who my sponsor was. I'm not ready to start the steps yet. I'll just take it one day at a time and see how it all progresses for me. As for my feelings for this woman, I'll have to put those on the back burner. I can appreciate my feelings coming up without having to act on them. Plus its nice to feel giddy and happy around someone when everything else seems to be going wrong. So this is my plan and we'll see how it goes. Now, if after hanging out a few times i find out she's single or, better yet, a lesbian too! Well then i may have some trouble on my hands. Hahaha
Behold the power of NO
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: WA
Posts: 7,764
Now, if after hanging out a few times i find out she's single or, better yet, a lesbian too! Well then i may have some trouble on my hands. Hahaha
Signed: The official party pooper
Seriously, it is not uncommon for people who are new to recovery to develop a puppy crush on someone in the rooms. I guess, it s a way for the av to divert us from facing our feelings and our addiction.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
Originally Posted by kellygurl1711
if after hanging out a few times i find out she's single or, better yet, a lesbian too! Well then i may have some trouble on my hands. Hahaha
Recovering ostrich
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Tampa Bay, Florida
Posts: 2,551
Hi Kelly! Congrats on your 12 days!
I'm gay and in AA as well. A couple of things: my home group is gay. I think for me it was important to find that because I can be wholly honest at all times and I'm doing it with people who are just like me. They are like family now!
Also, I would discourage getting a sponsor you find attractive and fascinating, that could put your sobriety at risk right now. It is ok to have a male sponsor, and in gay AA groups it is really common. For me, I found a woman who I am not attracted to and who had what I wanted, sobriety, sanity and a sense of humor.
It is a good idea to get a sponsor, for me it took a month to find mine. I listened to people talk in meetings and chose from there.
Best of luck!
I'm gay and in AA as well. A couple of things: my home group is gay. I think for me it was important to find that because I can be wholly honest at all times and I'm doing it with people who are just like me. They are like family now!
Also, I would discourage getting a sponsor you find attractive and fascinating, that could put your sobriety at risk right now. It is ok to have a male sponsor, and in gay AA groups it is really common. For me, I found a woman who I am not attracted to and who had what I wanted, sobriety, sanity and a sense of humor.
It is a good idea to get a sponsor, for me it took a month to find mine. I listened to people talk in meetings and chose from there.
Best of luck!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Chicago suburbs
Posts: 46
I ended up telling her that i am not ready to be sponsored [i haven't even gotten through the big book yet] even tho i think she'd be a fantastic sponsor. She didnt really say anything except she hopes to see me at meetings still. And now we're going for coffee after our 7am tomorrow. So that'll be interesting. 
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