HotSauceJeff

My name is Jeff. I have been drinking heavy for 26 years. Started out with Jack Daniels, then did the yager/bomb thing, it's been goldschlager lately.

I got me my first DIU in 1997. Certainly wasn't the first one that I deserved.

In June, I notice solid signs of liver failure (jaundice, swelling, change in stool color, change in urine color) and knew exactly what it was since I went through this with an ex-girlfriend who ended up getting a transplant. I went to the ER and they diagnosed me in liver failure.

Well, I was pretty messed up for several months. In fact I don't even remember them. I had stopped drinking after one of my first detoxes. I managed to eat well and get my enzymes back in level.

Of course, That meant I had to start experimenting. Not a good idea, but I was only doing maybe a hard cider here and there.

I then unfortunately started doing shots again. It certainly wasn't a good idea and soon led me to binging again. I also could tell when I was really pushing it because my body let me know.

Started and stopped several times over the next 4 months. I was seriously trying to control the demon, but was have MAJOR difficulties. However, I did learn during that period what several of my triggers were and how to avoid them. Of course, this often leaves you isolated.

Unfortunately, I made so many stupid decisions that I had to make more. What the hell, we are living again! Unfortunately I found one of my triggers. I learned a coworker front the past blew his brains out. I started drinking a lot.

This lead to more stupid, stupid decisions and I got my BAC up to lethal levels. I also got in a head on collision and a DIU. I was not wearing my seat belt and slammed my head into the windshield. The other driver was wearing theirs and suffered a wrist injury.

How I have survived all three of these incidence in a mere 8 months is beyond me. Apparently God doesn't want me.

So this begins a long journey…. Day 1.

I feel I have better support structure in place now and hopefully I can succeed being sober. I was missing that before. Never even really thought about it. I really don't have much of a choice anymore. Time to grow up.

Best,
Jeff

Dee74

Welcome Jeff - good to have you here

so whats your support structure like?

D

HeadLump

And a very, very warm welcome to you from the UK, EvilRepublic I can't imagine what the past 8 months have been like, but I'm very glad you've reached out and found us Here you'll find people who understand and who care and who will happily walk by your side on the sober road

And, yes, it looks like God wants you to stick around - He's dropped enough hints already! Time for you to play your part!

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum Jeff!!

KateL

Welcome Jeff xxxx

HotSauceJeff

I've been actually trying to get a better ideas of the programs here. I am considering meetings locally, located one fairly near by.

I am also looking into counseling or therapy of some sort.

I didn't even try to have a plan before, and at least I am starting to plan for a successful recovery. I've been recovering from the concussion and detoxing for the last 4 days. Yesterday I only had 2 hard ciders, weened off the shots earlier.

8pm tonight will actually be 24 hours sober. Most of my symptoms are under control and hopefully I can put together a solid plan this time.

This forum is pretty amazing, great people and information. I've been reading it the last 24 hours. (yeah, the insomnia!)

Thanks for your work!

Hevyn

We're so glad you joined us Jeff. I'm glad you lived to tell the tale, and can begin working on a new way of life. You can do this.

least

Welcome! Sounds like you're ready for a better way of living. I'm glad you joined the family. We offer a lot of support here.