Back again! :-(
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 53
Back again! :-(
Hi all! I am getting so angry with myself...I just cannot seem to say no to drinking at the weekends! I stopped last year for about 4 months but gradually got back into the whole weekend binges etc The last 2 weekends I have been disgustingly drunk resulting in black outs/stupid things/ridiculous comments (I get reminded) I am just so ashamed of myself. I feel such a failure that I cannot seem to go out/have fun without drinking. It's ruining me as a person. I having nothing more about me then going out and getting drunk. Unless alcohol is not involved I find everything very boring. I know I am a nice person when I am not drinking but become such a ******** when I do drink. Sick of having to justify this other person the next morning after nights out. I'm on day 3 sober today (last drink Friday 24th 11pm) I have been invited for a night out this Friday but have cancelled and instead I am going to go to a AA meeting - that's another thing I can't tell my friends or family - they do not understand, they tell me I'm not an alcoholic...so I guess you guys could help me? Thanks for reading
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 53
That's great advice YoungTom. I would love to be able to refuse drink when out. When you stopped did you find you were interested in other hobbies? I am so scared I have ruined my mind into not enjoying anything else again :-(
Sober since 10th April 2012
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Perth, Western Australia
Posts: 6,047
Hi Lilly88, true sobriety can be a long process. You get the rewards of waking up clear headed and proud of yourself right away, but it can take a long time to adjust your life to the non-drinking lifestyle. I won't sugar coat the fact that some parts of your current lifestyle may disappear, and it's up to you to work hard on replacing it with other interests.
It can be a lot of hard work, but if you can give it a year I hope you will see that it's worth it. I told my friends and family that I was on the wagon for a year; they got used to the idea very quickly and a couple even tried it themselves. When the year was up, I just quietly continued as I couldn't imagine myself going back to the old drinking life.
It can be a lot of hard work, but if you can give it a year I hope you will see that it's worth it. I told my friends and family that I was on the wagon for a year; they got used to the idea very quickly and a couple even tried it themselves. When the year was up, I just quietly continued as I couldn't imagine myself going back to the old drinking life.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 53
Thank you Feeling Great. I understand that. I guess it's just baby steps. I guess I will be spending a lot of my nights on here. This site is amazing. I'm really warmed by all your responses. It really means a lot.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 53
Thank you! Am hoping I can continue! Have removed all alcohol from the home and cancelled everything that involves alcohol for the following month! I do not want yep really tell people what I am doing - so the questioning will be hard for me
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Rural Colorado
Posts: 376
Hi Lilly,
Welcome back! I know what you mean about people saying you are not an alcoholic. That makes me irritated because people told me the same thing. How could anyone else but you know? Anyway, best to you and keep coming back.
Welcome back! I know what you mean about people saying you are not an alcoholic. That makes me irritated because people told me the same thing. How could anyone else but you know? Anyway, best to you and keep coming back.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 53
YoungTom - thank you for all your advice. I guess only time can be the biggest healer and of course patience. It will be nice to get to know the real me again. I feel drinking has taken over my look on life and I hate this!
2bhappier - I know right? I just think they do not understand my mind set. They say to me "just drink in moderation" ermmmm yeh I wish, I wouldn't be here if it was that simple to me! I feel grateful that I'm young enough to stop this now before it ends into complete distruction! My mum is an alcoholic, my grandad in hospital for alcohol related illness so I guess that is the way I was heading. :-(
2bhappier - I know right? I just think they do not understand my mind set. They say to me "just drink in moderation" ermmmm yeh I wish, I wouldn't be here if it was that simple to me! I feel grateful that I'm young enough to stop this now before it ends into complete distruction! My mum is an alcoholic, my grandad in hospital for alcohol related illness so I guess that is the way I was heading. :-(
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Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 465
Welcome back, Lilly! I've found my mind is much sharper than it has been in a long time (with spurts of normal brain fog!). I started doing things a little at a time: getting to early to read a book and enjoy some coffee in the quiet of the morning, cooking a new dish, etc.
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