DJSid

Today is day three of not drinking and I'm supposed to go to my relatives to celebrate the holidays. There will be beer and wine and everyone will be drinking. Im worried that Im not ready to be around alcohol since its only been a short period of time since I decided to quit drinking. I know everyone will be disappointed if I don't show up but its difficult at this point to announce to everyone that I decided to make this drastic (for me anyway) change in my life. It is stressing me out but deep down I think I will be better off not putting myself into a position where I may be tempted to drink and just go to a meeting tonight instead. If they knew what I was going through Im sure they would understand but as I said its not something I am ready to announce to my entire family as the reason I am not there. Any advice would be much appreciated!

Inca

What about an early meeting before you go and then stop by to make an appearance for a few and then leave? Also, you could just tell someone you will not feel like drinking and to make sure you don't. You don't have to explain why but knowing that there's someone in the room that you already told you wouldn't be drinking might help.

Another option is to stop by the party early and then leave because you have another commitment (a meeting).

Third option is to not attend the party at all. If you really don't feel like it's a good idea then go with your gut and just go to the meeting instead. For all they know, you're not feeling well or going through a lot right now and just can't make it.

deeker

Bring cranberry juice or apple juice and pour it in a glass when you get there. No one will know. Looks just like wine, but if you r not ready and you think u will relapse. Do what's best for you. Skip it. They will get over it!

DJSid

I sold my car once I moved back to Chicago from Los Angeles so its a two hour process just getting out there which makes things difficult as far as just stopping in. I think I will just call my mom and let her know whats going and she can tell everyone else that Im not feeling well, its not far from the truth. I know its important to be around family for the holidays but under the circumstances it might be best to avoid it this year. Most of my family doesn't drink allot but there are a few I used to get drunk with. Hopefully they will understand.

PurpleKnight

The most important thing is not to put your sobriety at risk, if that means giving it a miss then that's what you gotta do.

The feeling looking back in the new year of getting through the festive period and maintaining your sobriety will be amazing!

Seabee

Worry about you, not them. Don't go if you think theres a chance you'll drink. That's just my 2 cents...

doggonecarl

I think they will get over it. I think we tend to project a lot more "disappointment" than is actually present when we speculate about what people think.

You have a couple choices:

Make your apologies and don't go.

Make your apologies, make up an excuse, and don't go.

Make you apologies and tell them the truth about quitting drinking. You might be surprised how UN-disappointed they might be, especially if they are aware of the extent of your problem.

Thepatman

That is the exact reason why I'm staying home tonight. But I was honest, I told them I'm an Alcoholic and too early in sobriety to go.

DJSid

Thanks for all of the advice and encouragement! I decided not to go, I was honest with my dad and told him the situation. Whenever I quit, or should say tried to quit before I never told anyone because I figured I would start again and people would be disappointed in me. My dad will tell the people that I'm closest to whats going on and the ones that Im not that close too will just be told that Im not feeling well. I am going to a meeting tonight, I just called to make sure they had the same hours for the holidays and they do. Again, thanks!

HenryKrinkle

This sounds like a fantastic plan Sid.