Damyot

I'm 46 and I'm an addict. I don't want this anymore; I just want to have my "normal" life back. This is the 4th time I'm trying to quit cold turkey. My problem is morphine and hydromorphcontin. Getting off this stuff is really hard. My husband is on permanent disability due to a neck and back injury. That's where the hydromorphcontin comes in. He has a prescription for 2mg, 3mg, and 12mg pills so they're right there in my house; there's no getting away from them. My sister lives in the same apartment building as I do and I go visit her every night after dinner. She has a script for Morphine. I told my sister about my addiction a few months back and I told her to hide her script least I take any. Well, she did but I found them and started up again when the WD got too bad. I haven't told her I relasped. I also told my husband to hide his meds but I didn't tell him I was hooked on them. I don't know if I can do this without some kind of help from my family physician. I don't want to talk to him about this because one time he said that if some of his patients become addicted to narcotics, he just stops seeing them and they have to find another doctor. BTW, I'm Canadian and we don't have methodone clinics or addiction centres here in my town. You can't just call up a doctor who deal with addiction and make an appointment, you have to be referred.

I read all the tips on helping to cope with withdrawals but it really comes down to digging your heels in and riding it out. It's tough because I'm the only one working to support my husband and 12 year old. Trying to get up and go to work not looking like something the cat dragged in is very trying. But I have no other choice; I have to work.

I know what I'm in for and I'm dreading the insomnia, the burning sking and depression. Thanks for letting me spill my guts. Any advice would be much appreciated.

soberhawk

Hi Damyot,

Welcome to SR.

I do not have any advice regarding morphine – I have no experience there, but you are probably right it will be some hard days going cold turkey.

I just wanted to welcome you – I know there are people here that have battled with morphine – I hope they can give some advice.

Prayers and hugs from here – I hope it will not be to hard for you.

least

We have a forum specifically for substance abuse and you might find it helpful to ask your questions there. Give it a look.


Substance Abuse - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

doggonecarl

Welcome to SR.

If you are getting your drugs from your husband and sister, and that's your only source, then by all means admit to them you've been taking them and by all means necessary they are to insure you can't get to them. That's part of digging your heels in. Getting honest about your problem, and being accountable.

Your addiction is going to do everything in its power to talk you out of it, or to make you too ashamed to confess. But all you are really doing by not telling is keeping your access to your drugs open.

It's hard to do alone. You might seek out the nearest Narcotics Anonymous meeting.

Dee74

Hi and welcome Damyot

I have no experience but that sounds like heavy stuff to come off. Can you see another Dr maybe?

D

Damyot

Thank you for your responses. To Doggonecarl: I did admit to my sister a while ago and I finally admitted it to my husband at 4:00am this morning. I once heard that "secrets keep people sick" and that is soooo true! The worst thing is feeling completely alone because I was to ashamed to confess. Having it out in the open helps a bit. For me, it's the psycological aspect that I find the most difficult. Of course, the physical aspect is also very harsh. It's hard all around.

doggonecarl

Yes, it's hard kicking an addiction. But worth it. Work as hard on your recovery as you worked on supporting your addiction and you'll have a chance. Good luck.