jmbrandon87

I'm at day 89 sober right now, and there have been quite a few times in the past week, that I've almost decided to drink again. "just 1" is what I was thinking.. I'm emotionally drained from it... I try to be logical and think about my horrific story of why I quit drinking in the first place, but I'm hard headed and it doesn't always seem to justify or curb my cravings... I'm just ranting here... I haven't drank.. and I guess typing all this helps some.

Hevyn

I did that too in my early days of sobriety. Kept insisting willpower would keep me at one drink. It never did. The memory of why we quit does dim - and we are so tempted to give it one more try. In your heart, you know where it would lead. I'm glad you posted here - I'm sure others will relate.

Congratulations on your hard earned 89 days jm. It will get better.

Skye2

Unfortunately memories do fade, which is why women have more than one baby! You're fighting this better than you think though, by posting here - well done
Do you have any idea what's behind the cravings this week? Stress? Some other type of upset? Sometimes when you 'get' what's behind it all, the cravings fade again. hang in there

jmbrandon87

Well I'm trying to quit smoking now too which is irritating in its own... My work schedule this month so far is more hectic than usual. But other than that I don't know what could be making my cravings stronger, because I feel like those 2 aren't really contributing to the alcohol cravings that much.

ImperfectlyMe

Jmbrandon, I went through the exact same thing at that point in my recovery! These things happen usually in 30 day cycles. As you approaching your 90, it's pretty much par for the course. I know in my experience what worked for me was to just NOT drink, no matter what. Don't rationalize, over think, try to fight these cravings. Just don't drink! I promise you this part of the recovery will pass, and you will resume recovering without such a strong pull! Make sure you are following the HALT theory. i have a good link from Dee i will post when i find it
You should be very very proud of yourself for the last 89 days!

Found it
PAWS | Digital Dharma

Dee74

What have you been doing for your recovery jm?

D

Venecia

Hey JMBrandon! Hang in there. I have found it helpful to spend time on the forum, reading what others have shared. There are some painful, poignant stories of going back to drinking, only to find it is a very, very slippery slope. Nearly all of the stories begin with the theme of "just one or two, every once in a while."

Come here often. Try to exercise (it's helping me, anyway). Write -- as you noted, it helps. Check out the meetings. I think they're really valuable.

And believe in yourself.

MIRecovery

Going to AA.meetings always helped me. I found will.power alone was never enough

dirk626

89 days! Man alive... I just joined SR and I am on day 5. I can't wait until day 89. I bet you feel pretty good physically and mentally compared to before. I have stopped drinking before. I just came off of 21 days to go on a week long binder of epic proportions. Before that I quit for a week here and there, maybe once or twice a year. Before that I actually went a little over 30 days in 1995. The last time I was sober for 89 day's was in 1991. I was sober for 7 months while playing in the sand. Jmbrandon I would be open to any advice that you may have on what to expect when these first few weeks of honeymoon are over.

jmbrandon87

This has definitely been a challenge. The thing that has really helped me a lot is coffee and sweets!! That sounds simple enough, but coffee has become a life saver for me. I already liked it but I drink it way more than before. The sweets, like chocolate or chewy candies, ice cream, really seem to help with alcohol cravings. I know it's not healthy to eat them late at night, but I do and I guess it can't be any worse than drinking alcohol late at night.. Yes, at 3 months, you will have cravings, but at this point it becomes natural to just keep going on your way home instead of stopping at the bar or store and getting alcohol. Plus, you'll have a sense of accomplishment that you have gotten this far. At 3 months, I have SOOO much more energy than I used to have. And I can think a lot more clearly, and my anxiety and depression aren't nearly as bad. You should keep in mind all the bad that alcohol has caused and how you want your life to get better. Whenever you crave a drink and feel you're depriving yourself, you have to just let the feeling go. I'm still in my first 90 days so I'm still trying to get it right. I got to needing alcohol so bad that I was stealing, and hiding it, doing dangerous things. I quit because I hit rock bottom, then I hit it harder and went further until I got so bad that I have a scar on my forehead that I don't remember getting, from blacking out... And I live in a high rise and loved sitting on my balcony and drinking. I could have died, because I don't know what happened. I just know I woke up with 2 empty wine bottles in my bed and a bloody face... That was it for me... I decided no more. I had a nervous breakdown that day, and dialed 911 on myself, went to 2 weeks of an inpatient home. And I'm sober tonight, telling you about this

Tamerua

Not sure about you but I never had just 1 drink. Play the tape of where you end up after 1, that helps me.

Also, congrats on 89 days