Greetings from a lurker
Brother of the Wolf
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Walking With Giants
Posts: 436
Greetings from a lurker
Hi all. I'm not new to sobriety but since this is my first post, I thought it proper to post here. October 1st will be 500 days for me. Unless I blew it on the math that is. Anyhow, my DOC was alcohol and I genuinely never thought that I would be happily living without it. I was a binge drinker but with slow and steady maintenance drinking between binges until my mid 30's. then I graduated to passing out every night. Then I added regular day drinking. Then I added hard liquor out of the bottle to speed up my daily bac plateau-reaching. Then I had the joy of a withdrawal seizure while I was sleeping because a birthday bender left me too exhausted to wake up when my body needed a maintenance dose. Then the daily shakes. Then the full body tremors and seizures whenever my bac got to zero. Good times. Towards the end I let a few traumatic events help me into serious self medication. Finally at 35 I was up to being a 24 hour drinker. No sleep without a dangerously high bac. Then I stopped eating. After months of grappling with my self denial, I fessed up to my wife about just how bad I had gotten. I quit my booze-related job and checked into the hospital for medical detox on 5/15/12 and have never looked back with regret or anything other than elation. Of course, most of my "friends" disappeared. Some because I'm not fun anymore, and some because they feel awkward around me now. Oddly enough, many of my remaining friends were some of my most skilled accomplices who were inspired to make some changes by my sobriety. Honestly, I do get a bit nervous sometimes because of how easy I have found sobriety. But I have to remind myself that I was painfully aware of how miserable and unhealthy I was for the last few years that I was still drinking. So that's the short version. I have been lurking here for about two years and finally worked up the patience to type this all out.
P.S. For any of the visitors from the friends and family forum, my wife and I are still happily married after my addiction kicked both of our tails for several years. Don't lose hope. There are some happy endings for the spouses of alcoholics.
P.S. For any of the visitors from the friends and family forum, my wife and I are still happily married after my addiction kicked both of our tails for several years. Don't lose hope. There are some happy endings for the spouses of alcoholics.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: CAPE COD, MA
Posts: 1,020
Congratulations on your 500 days. Very well written post which I would recommend all newcomers to digest. Not taking anything from your story, it's the type of story often heard at AA meetings that I/we need to help keep things green. It points out to us what happened to a lot of people who continue to drink. THANK YOU AND BE WELL
Brother of the Wolf
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Walking With Giants
Posts: 436
Thank you all. I'm living proof that alcoholic hepatitis and brain damage can be repaired, so take heed and quit before your body craps out on you. I have seen three friends go down to that pointless and miserable way to die.
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