Going to turn down my dad's dinner invitation
Faith and reason
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: London
Posts: 941
Going to turn down my dad's dinner invitation
The first of many times I unsuccessfully tried to quit drinking this year, I was with my dad having lunch when I started drinking again. Of course it doesn't matter who I was with or where I was because I would have ultimately drunk again anyway; I wanted to.
I'm only bringing it up because he's invited me to dinner next Thursday. If I stay sober, I'll only have 11 days by Thursday. So I would usually have turned down the invitation right away, because I can do dinner with my dad any old time, preferably when I'm more confident and solid in my sobriety. But my American aunt and uncle are in town for 24 hours on a stopover on their way to another country. Because they live in the States, I hardly ever see them so that's why my dad is planning this dinner with them and inviting me.
Unlike my dad, they're not big drinkers so I wouldn't be surrounded with alcohol on all sides. Even my dad may not be drinking as he has to stick to a special diet most of the time.
Also, I did tell my dad that I've stopped drinking but I don't think he took me seriously because he just laughed and said "that's not like you." I didn't tell him that I'm an alcoholic, just that I've stopped drinking. (My parents are long-time divorced so obviously live apart, which is why my mum knows I'm an alcoholic but my dad doesn't.)
Well, having thought this through both in my head and in this post, I think it's pretty obvious I'm going to have to politely decline the invitation. 11 days would just be too soon, man. It's not worth the risk, not even for my aunt and uncle. If I live a long and sober life, I'll have plenty of other opportunities to see my American relatives.
I phoned a fellow AA woman just now and she's going to phone me back as she's in the middle of dinner with a friend (coincidentally enough!) I'm going to ask her for her advice and I'm pretty sure she'll tell me I'm making the right choice.
So my mind is pretty much made up. I just had to type out my reasoning on here in case I get stupid in the next week and think about changing my mind and going to the dinner after all! I'll just come back and look at this post.
I'm only bringing it up because he's invited me to dinner next Thursday. If I stay sober, I'll only have 11 days by Thursday. So I would usually have turned down the invitation right away, because I can do dinner with my dad any old time, preferably when I'm more confident and solid in my sobriety. But my American aunt and uncle are in town for 24 hours on a stopover on their way to another country. Because they live in the States, I hardly ever see them so that's why my dad is planning this dinner with them and inviting me.
Unlike my dad, they're not big drinkers so I wouldn't be surrounded with alcohol on all sides. Even my dad may not be drinking as he has to stick to a special diet most of the time.
Also, I did tell my dad that I've stopped drinking but I don't think he took me seriously because he just laughed and said "that's not like you." I didn't tell him that I'm an alcoholic, just that I've stopped drinking. (My parents are long-time divorced so obviously live apart, which is why my mum knows I'm an alcoholic but my dad doesn't.)
Well, having thought this through both in my head and in this post, I think it's pretty obvious I'm going to have to politely decline the invitation. 11 days would just be too soon, man. It's not worth the risk, not even for my aunt and uncle. If I live a long and sober life, I'll have plenty of other opportunities to see my American relatives.
I phoned a fellow AA woman just now and she's going to phone me back as she's in the middle of dinner with a friend (coincidentally enough!) I'm going to ask her for her advice and I'm pretty sure she'll tell me I'm making the right choice.
So my mind is pretty much made up. I just had to type out my reasoning on here in case I get stupid in the next week and think about changing my mind and going to the dinner after all! I'll just come back and look at this post.
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