How to live without the buzz?
How to live without the buzz?
I'm on Day 96, and can't get over how much I miss the buzz. It amazes me that the majority of people don't get drunk, and live a normal substance free life. I miss the relaxation alcohol provided me.
In my relatively brief periods of sobriety I did a lot of exercise, which is a much harder way to get to a relaxed, happy mood, but maybe it ought to be hard. Maybe the fast, easy lift is inherently bad design. There are runners out there who ruin their lives by running too much, I suppose, but it's a pretty short list, you know? And some people find great fulfillment in volunteer work or other "good works" activities, which I guess gives them good feelings and a mood lift.
And then there's always coffee . . if you can deal with the stern lecturing from the dental hygienist on stains
And then there's always coffee . . if you can deal with the stern lecturing from the dental hygienist on stains
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York
Posts: 103
I guess at the end of the day its finding other things in your life to relax you. I love hiking. I love doing something active but being surrounded by something beautiful. Reading also is very relaxing to me. Exercise is great too, but I don't want to overdo that - I'd rather take my time and enjoy the process. Alcohol masked my feelings for so long that I want to feel things again and enjoy the process of everything. I tend to go full force, so now I want to change that and just take my time.
WWG I understand what you mean. I miss the buzz too, and that feeling of being "taken away" from responsibilities for awhile. The altered state where your focus is on something different-sometimes it's something profound, sometimes it's nonsensical and mindless. I think we romanticize parts of it, but I think there really is a loss there for most of us. In my opinion it's better to acknowledge it than to pretend it doesn't exist and then chase it and relapse.
If it helps any, at 11 months it feels like less of a loss than it did at 3. The other thing to think about is that we could get that buzz back at any time and are actively choosing not to. Life without it obviously has value to us and we are adjusting fine without it.
If it helps any, at 11 months it feels like less of a loss than it did at 3. The other thing to think about is that we could get that buzz back at any time and are actively choosing not to. Life without it obviously has value to us and we are adjusting fine without it.
Try to think about all of the crappy things that you are not getting from alcohol. The negative outweigh the benefits for me.
I am struggling right now too. I want to smoke a big fat joint instead though.
I am struggling right now too. I want to smoke a big fat joint instead though.
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
I hear you, WWG. The sheer buzz is what I missed, too. When I relapased, I got it once, that first time--then I kept trying to recreate it and it was insultingly impostor-like. The feeling of dead-headed confusion I got time after time was NOT the buzz I craved. Yet it was shockingly hard to get back on the wagon, even being sadder but wiser. Two weeks' worth of anger and frustration (and wasted money) vs. 10 minutes' worth of buzz. It really wasn't worth it. I'm glad to be proudly sober now. You just can't go home again.
If I had only ever have got that buzz when I drank I would never have given up....
Unfortunately, the inevitability of me drinking until I blacked out...of doing things I regretted, of waking up with shame and anxiety...etc etc...that was the reality of my drinking.
The days of drinking and being able to stop at the buzz stage are so far in the past they are almost forgotten ( until my AV lies to me that it's still possible for me to drink like that of course!)
Unfortunately, the inevitability of me drinking until I blacked out...of doing things I regretted, of waking up with shame and anxiety...etc etc...that was the reality of my drinking.
The days of drinking and being able to stop at the buzz stage are so far in the past they are almost forgotten ( until my AV lies to me that it's still possible for me to drink like that of course!)
You need to get high on life, man!
Just kidding.
I missed the buzz in the beginning as well, but as you get some distance between you and drinking, you miss the buzz less.
There really are better things in life.
Just kidding.
I missed the buzz in the beginning as well, but as you get some distance between you and drinking, you miss the buzz less.
There really are better things in life.
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York
Posts: 103
In the end i kinda went from first drink to passed out / black out in under 2 hrs .
There used to be a buzz to it years ago but in the end it was just my "get out of life free" card . except it wasn't free and it made my life a mess .
Bestwishes, m
There used to be a buzz to it years ago but in the end it was just my "get out of life free" card . except it wasn't free and it made my life a mess .
Bestwishes, m
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Canada. About as far south as you can get
Posts: 4,768
WWG have you hit the gym yet buddy. I did put a decent post in our one year and under club about starting training....I get a wicked buzz when I'm working out and an even better buzz when I start noticing the little changes in the mirror....Steve.
I did workout yesterday. It did feel good, but I miss that feeling of the first few drinks. But, I have to keep sober. I need to get intros daily workout routine. Thanks Steve
I think you need to get real about the buzz Matt.
It's chemical elation, it's not real, it's ephemeral - and it 's not worth what you put yourself and your loved ones through.
There is joy and happiness and even elation in a sober life - if you're prepared to work for that happiness.
It's not the same as a buzz - but it's deeper, it's real, and it's long lasting.
You have a lot of good things in your life Matt - start thinking of them....and not some buzz that, frankly, I think you're romanticising the heck out of here.
D
It's chemical elation, it's not real, it's ephemeral - and it 's not worth what you put yourself and your loved ones through.
There is joy and happiness and even elation in a sober life - if you're prepared to work for that happiness.
It's not the same as a buzz - but it's deeper, it's real, and it's long lasting.
You have a lot of good things in your life Matt - start thinking of them....and not some buzz that, frankly, I think you're romanticising the heck out of here.
D
I miss it occasionally.
I've found other things that are fun. I don't chase the buzz anymore. It was SO short lived and fleeting, then I spent so much time, effort and money trying to recreate it.
I do other things now that help me tune IN to life, rather than out of it. I've sorta made friends with life. I feel relaxed without having to hide all the time.
I've found other things that are fun. I don't chase the buzz anymore. It was SO short lived and fleeting, then I spent so much time, effort and money trying to recreate it.
I do other things now that help me tune IN to life, rather than out of it. I've sorta made friends with life. I feel relaxed without having to hide all the time.
Well for recovery to work, you have to benefit from it in some way. Did you just stop drinking, but continue to live as you always did? That means you have experienced no personal growth. You may want to look at being more productive and building an awesome present life, instead of focusing on what it is you think you are missing from not using. Ive gained so much in my own sobriety, because I push myself daily to grow and tackle challenges that used to scare me. If your just sitting around and havent changed anything besides the actual act of drinking, then you arent being as productive as you need to be to make this work. You may also want to look into PAWS, because you are right at that stage where it makes itself the most known and can play tricks on your mind. Google it.
I don't miss the buzz because, for me, the buzz didn't last long. I was often falling down drunk about an hour of two into my drinking. When i drank, i was engaging in a ritual that ruled my life. I needed it, i didn't want it. Now, i find other things to fill that hole in me. I poured alcohol into that hole for many years and that never filled it up. There was always room for more until oblivion took me. I still have that hole but i put other things into it. I talk to other sober alcoholics, i do a little step work, i read both recovery and nonrecovery books, i go to meetings and read the SR forums, i take care of myself both inside and out. I can't just ignore the hole in me. I've got to pour something into it. I just know that i can't pour alcohol into it anymore and that's okay.
It is possible to relax without alcohol but you have to really believe it. It's amazing what a simple exercise like deep breathing and light meditation can do if you are willing to set aside your disbelief in it. Approach relaxing exercise with an open mind, open heart and a willingness. It may not work the first few times but keep at it for a while. You may be pleasantly surprised!
It is possible to relax without alcohol but you have to really believe it. It's amazing what a simple exercise like deep breathing and light meditation can do if you are willing to set aside your disbelief in it. Approach relaxing exercise with an open mind, open heart and a willingness. It may not work the first few times but keep at it for a while. You may be pleasantly surprised!
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