quitforme79

Today I am angry at myself for some of the consequences I am still going thru from my last relapse. I usually feel positive. I know these limitations are temporary but my body and mind are in a negative mode. For the past 2 days I have done hardly anything but sleep. It's good I have work tomorrow...It will keep me in check. I did attend my AA meetings this weekend and am heading to one soon. I don't want to go. I want to isolate. But this is a red flag for me so I need to defy it and get myself out even if it's uncomfortable for me. Even if I don't share, at least I will be participating in life and most importantly, in my recovery.

Last night I was laying in bed thinking about the benefits of sobriety. Even if I don't FEEL positive, I can think about where I was and what I don't want to go back to.

Hope everyone is having a good sober day, thanks for listening to my vent.

trachemys

<----pushing from behind


Just keep moving forward.

quitforme79

Thanks

Anna

I know it took me awhile to feel good physically when I stopped drinking, and it was frustrating. When I look back at it, I realize that things were happening just as they should. I'm glad you're staying positive.

FreeFall

Everyone goes through these patches of the blahs, whether sober or addicted. I find it easier to move through to the other side while sober-the blahs pass more quickly. I've also learned sleep is key. If you need to sleep and don't, you're more likely to have these downer periods. Listen to your body, take naps, get out of the house when you're up to it, and the blues will pass.

Find something on YouTube that never fails to make you laugh. Just the act of laughing can sometimes jolt you out of it. For me, Martin Short's Ed Grimley skits will do it every time. No matter how many times I've seen them lol

Fallow

I feel the same way usually once a week or so.. And unfortunately for me meetings do not always help.

What has been helping me out is prayer, meditation, and remembering to have gratitude that I can now see the damage of my past life clearly. That I dont have to live that way ever again.

Thankfully I do not have to look at the wreckage 24/7 though!

Fallow

Oh and thanks so much for sharing this. I never find the courage to say how I feel down sometimes. You are not alone

quitforme79

Thanks guys Freefall, funny you say that because I was watching funny youtube videos Sunday night and it definitely helped to laugh. I will check out your reccomendation. And thank you fallow..I too don't always have the courage to talk about it either. I have always thought that I should portray this happy positive person even when I was in the depths of my miserable drinking. I didn't want anyone to know I wasn't OKAY. That got me nowhere good. It is very helpful to know I am not alone The blues are starting to lift and I know that God has plans for me even in these quiet blah times. Hopefully my mood will continue to improve as the week goes on. I am expecting my work permit this week in the mail. I can then drive to work and that will be so fabulous. In 87 days I will have my full license (and freedom) back...but whose counting?

paul99

It's the meetings that I resist that are the ones I need to hit the most. You are right - even being there is important. Sometimes I just need to be with my peeps.

Thanks for the post!