A rough one today...
A rough one today...
After having dreams of finding pain pills and the guilt that comes along with taking them, it was a pretty all around depressing day.
I worked and was overwhelmed there and thought alot about how I'm in pain and trying to justify why i should call my doctor and ask for a refill...
I really do have an issue of pain that I'm dealing with but i can't take pills responsibly and when asking my husband to dole them out to me only results in fights.
Why do i do this myself every month?? It's always so anti climactic when i would get them, like okay i have them and took them, now i feel like ****....next?!?!
Argh!!!!!! I'm tired of the mental noise!!!
I worked and was overwhelmed there and thought alot about how I'm in pain and trying to justify why i should call my doctor and ask for a refill...
I really do have an issue of pain that I'm dealing with but i can't take pills responsibly and when asking my husband to dole them out to me only results in fights.
Why do i do this myself every month?? It's always so anti climactic when i would get them, like okay i have them and took them, now i feel like ****....next?!?!
Argh!!!!!! I'm tired of the mental noise!!!
It's pretty normal to have those ups and downs at first.... at least it was for me. I think some of it is chemical and some of it is dealing with the mental stuff..... it definitely took a while before I didn't feel that pull from my addiction.
The challenges end up making us stronger, though. One thing that helped me a lot when nothing else seemed to work was finding things to be grateful for (a roof over my head, enough to eat, etc.). Hang in there - the bad days don't last and it really will get better!
The challenges end up making us stronger, though. One thing that helped me a lot when nothing else seemed to work was finding things to be grateful for (a roof over my head, enough to eat, etc.). Hang in there - the bad days don't last and it really will get better!
Like artsoul says there's a lot of up and down in early recovery, Peanut - I really hope things will level out for you soon
Are you exploring other options with your Dr to deal with the pain?
D
Are you exploring other options with your Dr to deal with the pain?
D
Dee,
We tried everything non narcotic before we got to the pain pills and she is fairly conservative with those.
To be honest, i haven't told her about my addiction. I know that's bad. I'm afraid to. The last time i was honest with a doctor and spilled my guts about everything, they referred me to a methadone clinic and that just accelerated my addiction to soaring new heights!!!
Doctors, pharmacists and dentists are real sore spots for me. I can't stand them. I hate anyone who has the power over my pills. Lol!!!!
That's why it never works when my poor husband has control. He has to deal with me.
Also my doctor wants to put me on an anti depressant for pain and i don't want to do that. I've tried several anti depressants in the past and i don't like the side effects.
I told my doctor she could put me on anti depressants when or if i become depressed....
We tried everything non narcotic before we got to the pain pills and she is fairly conservative with those.
To be honest, i haven't told her about my addiction. I know that's bad. I'm afraid to. The last time i was honest with a doctor and spilled my guts about everything, they referred me to a methadone clinic and that just accelerated my addiction to soaring new heights!!!
Doctors, pharmacists and dentists are real sore spots for me. I can't stand them. I hate anyone who has the power over my pills. Lol!!!!
That's why it never works when my poor husband has control. He has to deal with me.
Also my doctor wants to put me on an anti depressant for pain and i don't want to do that. I've tried several anti depressants in the past and i don't like the side effects.
I told my doctor she could put me on anti depressants when or if i become depressed....
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