jakemmy22

Hi Del - a few things that I related with your post - and I'm reminded in the 12 and 12 - a book that is AA in basis: By going back in our own drinking histories, we could show that years before we realized it we were out of control, that our drinking even then was no mere habit, that it was indeed the beginning of a fatal progression". (page 23)

Controlling it didn't work for me. Neither did hiding, moderating, lying, admitting, crying, not leaving the house, leaving the house, only drinking a certain amount, type, time of day...etc. One drink led to 3 bottles and some shots.

Think about how much time you spent drinking. How much time you are spending now. Then put that effort into making changes for yourself, your health and your life.

I too, had a huge problem with a label. My father is an alcoholic, and I'll be damned if I'm him! Well guess what? I am. And I broke the cycle. And saved so much more in the process.

Don't recite the prayer at the end. I don't. And holding hands? Do you shake a stranger's hand when you first meet them? Same deal.

Good luck!!!

DelBoy

Thanks for all the kind, supportive words. I'm determined to do things properly this time around and I know what I have to do and what is going to work for me. I have the strength to not only do what's right for me, but also what is best. All of those close to me know I have a drink problem and I know it too, now it's just a case of letting that little demon inside of me know I'm not going to take his **** anymore.

I made it out of the house today, aiming to go visit my sister and her kids. I had to turn back before getting there due to being sick and other unpleasant bodily functions. Now on the bus home. I still feel physically and emotionally ruined, and I know I will for some time, the most important thing is that I am feeling positive.

jakemmy22

It will take a while for your body to get back to what it was before drinking. I too, had zero motivation, wanted to lay in bed all day, headaches, sleep patterns were jacked, etc. Think about how much sugar and poison you've been putting into your body - stuff that isn't needed in your body. It takes a while to get all of that out of your system. Your body is adjusting - you just need to listen to your body, and not your mind right now, in my expierence.

Something that had me thinking in early days was "Do the next RIGHT thing". Put yourself first right now - good job!

Delilah1

Welcome Del,

Glad you found SR, there are lots of paths to recovery, and it is definitely not a one size fits all approach. I have taken parts of different programs and books that make sense to me personally.

Once you start to feel better physically find things you enjoy to fill the time you would have been drinking/using: exercise, read, hobby, time with family...

Also, spend some time reading and posting on here, it really does help.