Tired of being Tired
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 3
Tired of being Tired
This is my first post as I just joined up. Would I consider myself an alcoholic? Parts of me fight the other parts for that answer. I知 a heavy Binge drinker, not a daily thing, but every week for sure. I知 at the point that I知 tired of being tired for days after and my body hurting and just my whole concentration not being there.
My mom is a recovering alcoholic, so I know it痴 in me. I know I could never be like how she was, I can稚 take drinking every day, but when I do I do it with both feet in and until there is nothing left.
I don稚 feel I知 a bad person, but I know I can be a better one. I can be a better husband and farther, and think by at least reading all your posts I will accomplish that. I have decided to stop with the Beer today, and live a better life and no longer feel for 3 days after that i am going to die.
I知 tired of being tired, feeling crappy, and being lazy and just upset with myself in general because I can稚 stop at one. So time not to start at 1
I look forward to the inspiration you all seem to give
My mom is a recovering alcoholic, so I know it痴 in me. I know I could never be like how she was, I can稚 take drinking every day, but when I do I do it with both feet in and until there is nothing left.
I don稚 feel I知 a bad person, but I know I can be a better one. I can be a better husband and farther, and think by at least reading all your posts I will accomplish that. I have decided to stop with the Beer today, and live a better life and no longer feel for 3 days after that i am going to die.
I知 tired of being tired, feeling crappy, and being lazy and just upset with myself in general because I can稚 stop at one. So time not to start at 1
I look forward to the inspiration you all seem to give
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Gatineau, QC, CA
Posts: 5,100
Welcome to SR! Alcohol consumption doesn't make you a bad person. The fact that you are admitting there is an issue takes courage my new friend. The choice is your and was always there. I was also raised by an Alcoholic mother, she did not make that choice and died as a result. This is your choice, you don't have to live the same way as your mother does.
best of luck!
best of luck!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Toronto,Ontario
Posts: 1,027
Welcome rockfish !
Sounds like you had enough. Are you now willing to do whatever it takes to get and stay sober ?
Alcoholism is progressive. That's a fact... I started off as a binge drinker, and my binges started earlier and earlier in the week...... That really scared me, as many of the "not yet's" were becoming reality.
Sounds like you had enough. Are you now willing to do whatever it takes to get and stay sober ?
Alcoholism is progressive. That's a fact... I started off as a binge drinker, and my binges started earlier and earlier in the week...... That really scared me, as many of the "not yet's" were becoming reality.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Cleveland, OH
Posts: 1,191
Welcome!
In my experience it seems that an individual need not drink everyday to be an alcoholic. The way I see it is that an alcoholic loses 2 things when it comes to alcohol. Choice and control. So it leaves one with 2 questions. Can I choose to leave alcohol alone and successfully do it, for good? And/or when I do drink can I always control the amount I take? A non-alcoholic can answer yes to both of these.
Something to ponder....
In my experience it seems that an individual need not drink everyday to be an alcoholic. The way I see it is that an alcoholic loses 2 things when it comes to alcohol. Choice and control. So it leaves one with 2 questions. Can I choose to leave alcohol alone and successfully do it, for good? And/or when I do drink can I always control the amount I take? A non-alcoholic can answer yes to both of these.
Something to ponder....
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 3
Originally Posted by TorontoGuy28 
Welcome rockfish !
Sounds like you had enough. Are you now willing to do whatever it takes to get and stay sober ?.
Sounds like you had enough. Are you now willing to do whatever it takes to get and stay sober ?.
I値l learn with every step I guess
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Des Moines IA
Posts: 377
Great that you decided that given the unpleasant effects alcohol has on you, and your pattern of other-than-social drinking, and your pedigree that not drinking is a good idea for you. Seems like doing that will solve things.
If you find yourself changing your mind and living like you described again...then that would indicate it's a somewhat more serious condition than you'd prefer it to be, requiring more in the way of a solution.
Good decision, keep it.
If you find yourself changing your mind and living like you described again...then that would indicate it's a somewhat more serious condition than you'd prefer it to be, requiring more in the way of a solution.
Good decision, keep it.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,512
I'm glad you've decided to stop drinking. It's not how often or how much your drink, but it's what happens to you when you drink, that makes you an alcoholic.
Most of us have had to make some big changes in our lives to stay sober. And, that often involves people (friends & family) and places and activities that need to change.
It sounds like you're ready.
Most of us have had to make some big changes in our lives to stay sober. And, that often involves people (friends & family) and places and activities that need to change.
It sounds like you're ready.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Ohio
Posts: 818
rockfish,
I came here in November of 2011 knowing that I had a problem with alcohol, but not knowing if that made me an alcoholic. I figured there must be a spectrum of alcohol abuse and that it was more complicated than a simple yes/no.
I commited to abstaining for a month or so to prove that I was in control and I accomplished that goal.
Then I was at a small Christmas party with long time friends and I allowed myself to have a beer or two and a little wine. Moderation was my new watch word. So far so good.
Then over the course of 2012, I began to drink more frequently. Of course, since my wife knew I had commited to cutting back, I had to now hide my drinking. Hidden bottles ... hidden glasses ... hidden bottles in the recycle bin ... that kind of stuff. I wasn't as "bad" as before, but I was not heading in a good direction and the fact was that I was drinking too much.
I finally admitted to myself how imporant alcohol was to me. Even if I drank in moderation, I would be planning for and arranging my life around those drinks. That's not a healthy relationship.
So, on Monday I quit. Only Day 3, so I don't have a great deal of wisdom to share. I still struggle with the labels and what exactly it means to be an alcoholic. What I do know is that I'm prone to excess with alcohol and that alcohol has done nothing to enhance my life. Like you, I want to be the best father and husband possible. Deep down I know that means no alcohol. Simple as that.
I was in your shoes a little over a year ago and I know the courage it takes to come here for the first time and open yourself up to others. You're doing a great thing for your family and, most importantly, yourself.
I came here in November of 2011 knowing that I had a problem with alcohol, but not knowing if that made me an alcoholic. I figured there must be a spectrum of alcohol abuse and that it was more complicated than a simple yes/no.
I commited to abstaining for a month or so to prove that I was in control and I accomplished that goal.
Then I was at a small Christmas party with long time friends and I allowed myself to have a beer or two and a little wine. Moderation was my new watch word. So far so good.
Then over the course of 2012, I began to drink more frequently. Of course, since my wife knew I had commited to cutting back, I had to now hide my drinking. Hidden bottles ... hidden glasses ... hidden bottles in the recycle bin ... that kind of stuff. I wasn't as "bad" as before, but I was not heading in a good direction and the fact was that I was drinking too much.
I finally admitted to myself how imporant alcohol was to me. Even if I drank in moderation, I would be planning for and arranging my life around those drinks. That's not a healthy relationship.
So, on Monday I quit. Only Day 3, so I don't have a great deal of wisdom to share. I still struggle with the labels and what exactly it means to be an alcoholic. What I do know is that I'm prone to excess with alcohol and that alcohol has done nothing to enhance my life. Like you, I want to be the best father and husband possible. Deep down I know that means no alcohol. Simple as that.
I was in your shoes a little over a year ago and I know the courage it takes to come here for the first time and open yourself up to others. You're doing a great thing for your family and, most importantly, yourself.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 85
Good to have you on board. Take it one day at a time -- and by that I mean ONLY think about today -- that you are not going to drink today. Don't think about tomorrow or a year from now. Just say not today. I am on day 2. I had two and a half years of sobriety, but this New Years I thought "maybe I can drink moderately". It didn't work. I want to get back to two and half years sober again, and the only way you and I can do that is in single days of sobriety.
Best to you. Keep posting.
Best to you. Keep posting.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Toronto,Ontario
Posts: 1,027
Originally Posted by rockfish
Ya I知 ready, the scary thing is how to change all those factors out there. I知 not the issue I知 scared of, I知 strong and when i put my mind to something I know I can accomplish. The scary thing is am I strong enough to fight the outside influences (friends etc.). I don稚 know how to approach that yet. I have started today by telling some people I知 close to I知 done, but know that is only as good today and is much harder when people want to do a "get together".
I値l learn with every step I guess
I値l learn with every step I guess
I found my answers in the rooms of AA, on this board and in the big book...
For the first 3-4 months, I avoided all situations/people/places that reminded me of drinking... Sobriety comes first. Always.
Now I enjoy a new sense of freedom ! Go and do anything l want...
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 138
I was never going to be my mom either. When I stopped drinking I was on my way to alienating my family just as she had. My binge drinking had turned into a daily thing and I was hiding alcohol. I quickly crossed over from binge drinking to drinking daily. Good luck in your journey.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Ohio
Posts: 818
This is probably true for most of us, but I didn't see myself as the "typical" problem drinker. Since I hadn't hit what I considered rock bottom, I thought change and moderation were within my reach. I had an image in my mind of what an alcoholic was and, frankly, that wasn't me. I hadn't lost my wife, job, or health and wasn't alienated from my kids. Thank God I caught it in time and could just learn to "cut back". That's what I thought.
If spinach had caused me the same problems caused by alcohol, I would have easily given it up. The fact that I couldn't do that with alcohol, told me that this was different. Why was alcohol so important to me that I was looking for a way to keep it in my life?
Anyway, that's where I'm at now. I know the future will bring it's share of challenges, but I'm going to do everything I can to keep alcohol out of my life. It's just not worth it.
If spinach had caused me the same problems caused by alcohol, I would have easily given it up. The fact that I couldn't do that with alcohol, told me that this was different. Why was alcohol so important to me that I was looking for a way to keep it in my life?
Anyway, that's where I'm at now. I know the future will bring it's share of challenges, but I'm going to do everything I can to keep alcohol out of my life. It's just not worth it.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: fort wayne, IN.
Posts: 1,085
I quit a couple months ago. I stayed away from everybody. Including my family. I did not have a single holiday dinner with them even though they persisted. They don't drink but I could not handle conversation with them. I have made it so far. I had to listen to myself. Anytime I felt the slightest anxiety I took it as a warning. I only did what I had to do and that was enough.
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: "I'm not lost for I know where I am. But however, where I am may be lost ..."
Posts: 5,273
welcome rockfish and congrats on your decision to change our life for the better. Hard, sure at times, but exciting too!
On the contrary...your post was filled with wisdom. Length of time does not necessarily equal wisdom. Keep up the wonderful message for yourself and for others.
Originally Posted by WhoDey
So, on Monday I quit. Only Day 3, so I don't have a great deal of wisdom to share.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
