Darth

Hi All,

I have been sober for 28 days now and I have to attend a Masquerade Ball where there will undoubtedly copious amounts of alcohol... I'm considering letting loose for one night... I can't avoid this ball nor do I think I have the willpower to sit through 4 hours of work associates sober.. Damn It

Dee74

Welcome Darth

I let loose for one night back in late 2007and then drank for the next two years and more.

It's just not a viable toss of the dice for me Darth.
I had to ask myself a lot of times in early recovery - whats my most important priority.

I missed on a few parties then but I'm still sober 6 years later - and I can go anywhere now.

Give yourself a break for now, Darth.

Do you really have to go to this thing?

D

sofie

I have a hard time with those events...sometimes the excitement clouds my judgement.

Soberween

This exact thing is what kept me from getting sober for years. I would tell myself that this would be the last hurrah. It never was. I would go another 30 days and then there would be some type of scenario you described and boom another last hurrah. Since it was only 30 days, I figured I wasn't too far in to commit myself to sobriety. I'd do that on the next go around. In reality, I really was doing the really hard part (early sobriety) of recovery over and over. It really is a vicious circle and I strongly advise you to not let loose for one night. These are the type of things they are talking about when they say early recovery is really, really tough.....nights like the Masquerade Ball. Soldier through this event and don't let the alcohol win!

sofie

Great advice! True from my experience too!

Delilah1

I have two work Christmas parties, one is a happy hour at a bar and one is a house party. I have decided to skip both. I am using the crazy time of year and kid activities as my reason. I am just about at the two month mark and I don't want to put myself in this situation yet.

Xune

Does alcohol cause problems in your life?

I imagine the answer is yes.

Begs the question, why would you willingly consume alcohol, knowing full well that nothing good will come of it?

If you do not believe you can abstain while present at the party, I suspect the smart thing to do would be to simply miss the party.

Ultimately you will have to make a choice and deal with whatever consequences result.

Xune

I think you've made a very wise decision.

Good on ya!

Darth

Thank's for the feedback... You are all correct and have given me the truth I needed to hear

Happier

There will ALWAYS be another event that will feel like another excuse to cut loose. Next it will be New Years, then the Super Bowl, then a birthday, then ..........

The key for me has been to learn how to participate in, and then slowly how to begin enjoying these activities while sober. I am not totally there yet but I have gotten to where I have no desire to drink at them. They are no longer associated with "my next drunk" and I am grateful for that! I feel like I am slowly getting the real meaning of these events back and it is not just to drink. I think this is maybe how "normal" people live. ?? ; )

It takes time and I agree that skipping them until they are less risky and less stressful is very good advice indeed.

kittycat3

yay!!! Good job Darth. I skipped the work HH last night too for the very same reason. I know they say these work parties are a necessary part of the job but I heartily disagree - if you need to say sober that is your #1 concern! There will always be another party, and maybe you'll feel like going when you are stronger in sobriety. Or maybe not & that is TOTALLY OK TOO!!

applecake

I'm glad you brought this issue to the forum, Darth. For me personally, work parties and alcohol are a really bad combination. My friends and family are a lot more tolerant of my failings than my co-workers and my boss.