Just starting recovery from Binge Drinking
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: NY
Posts: 13
Just starting recovery from Binge Drinking
Hello All 
This looks like a nice community and I hope to find some nice people to relate to and to encourage me in my journey of recovery. Here goes nothing...
(WARNING- this post went WAY longer then I expected... sorry about that :/)
I am a 32 year old married woman, been with my husband 10 years, married 5. We have no children yet but are starting to actively try to conceive. I work from home as a web and graphic designer- I LOVE my work, but of course being self-employed has it's challenges, and working from home means I don't get out much, don't have much 'fun' or social activity. Which doesn't help me with my 'problem'. I also have depression and anxiety, another contributor, as well as possibly some personality issues that make it hard to keep friends, makes me impulsive and sometimes offensive due to boundary issues, and who knows what else- I'm a train wreck lol.
As a teenager I got into drugs, the usual track record, from minor stuff to fun stuff to straight up hard addictions (heroin). After a few years of completely screwing my life up I was able to get clean off the evil H, but still did some minor stuff (to me anyway) like weed and X. Over the years I was happy to leave it mostly at social use, but drinking came into play as well (partly as I went from H to drinking, somehow that got me off the H, but I turned into an alcoholic drinking almost every day for a mercifully short spurt of time there). I was 18 at that time. 19 was a relatively mellow year, most addictions gone as I concentrated on my first serious job. After quitting that job though, I was back at it. Then once I turned 21, I was living on my own with a bf who was of the same smoke weed/ drink all the time for fun mindset, and I was back at it again. It didn't help that we had occasion to be at the bar a few times a week due to a team he was involved in that played pool at the local bars. I stink at pool lol, so instead I spent my time at the bars getting snockered, as I've heard it put lol.
Here's where the problem began- Binge Drinking. At that age it was a pretty popular thing, and most of my friends well, that was what we would do- that was what you did to have a good time, party, etc. Whoo hoo, fun times. But that was 11 years ago... here I am a married adult with a pretty good life, but I still feel that binge drinking is THE way to have fun. I don't drink every day by any means, so for a long time I thought eh, no big deal, I drink every weekend or every other weekend, I'm certainly not like my father, a 'real' alcoholic who drank from the time he came home from work to the time he passed out every evening. BUT at the same time I knew my drinking was a problem.
Because when I start drinking- I don't stop until I'm puking (rarely), passing out, or everyone's gone home or to bed and since the party's over I go to bed as well . I'm the last one to call it a night, partying til dawn quite often, and getting upset when others can't party that long with me- I never want the party to end. Over the years the way I behave when I'm drunk has gotten worse, as I've started having trouble with realizing I am drunk- even my husband has a hard time seeing that I am drunk, as it seems it creeps up on me and hits me all at once so I go from having fun to being completely wasted. And that's what I want- to be completely wasted and having a great time- problem is, my behavior can get out of hand. Mostly just being overbearing, life of the party to the extreme, lines of borders with people blur, and my impulsivity, which I have issues with when I'm sober, hits an all time high. This leads to offending people, or horrible embarrassment. Lately I've been winding up at the end of the night hysterically crying about how unhappy I am and well, saying things to my husband that I shouldn't, that he doesn't deserve, and that hurts him.
When I wake up the next day, a lot of times I don't remember the end of the evening- knowing my propensity for embarrassing myself etc, I am fraught with anxiety over what I may have said or done. This can evolve into full blown panic attacks. When I do remember most of the night, I go over and over and over it in my head to see what I did wrong, if I offended anyone, if everyone must think I'm a whack job, etc. I constantly have the fear that whoever we were hanging out with now hates me and won't want to be our friends anymore. If I recall being mean or just hurtful to my husband, I am despondent for having put him through that.
So obviously, drinking a lot is not good for me, or anyone around me. But I still do it, still feel the need to party and have fun and this is the only way I feel that same excitement. Several times a year it gets out of hand like this and I decide to stop drinking- mostly blaming anti depressants I'm on for making me so out of control and having awful hangovers where I am shaking and having panic attacks. I tell people I can't drink for awhile because of my medication. And it actually works for a few months- until I start feeling angry that I can't do what everyone else is doing. They can have a great time, why can't I? It's not fair! is what I think.... and so then I decide I should be able to too, and I'm back at it again. Rinse, Repeat.
I obviously can't keep doing this to myself and those around me. And as I said above, we are trying to conceive so alcohol is definitely out for a good long while for pregnancy and raising a child. My reason for being here now I guess is to make sure it is out for good. It really bothers me that I can't drink when others do, and I can't just drink a few glasses of wine, or a few beers, etc. I've tried that- works occasionally so I think I'm good, I got this! Then inevitably I'm back binge drinking and a disaster.
It's got to stop. I know that, everyone around me knows it but won't say anything (they do tend to enable me a bit), but this is up to me to do myself, for myself and for a better life. I hope I can find people here with the same kind of experiences to relate to, or just anyone here who knows what I'm going through and will maybe help cheer me along a bit
Sorry that's so long, but I've never gotten that out before to anyone, blogged a bit about it for my eyes only, but never publicly admitted it or really committed to such a change. But it's out there now, and I've got to stick to it.
Thanks for reading
~M
This looks like a nice community and I hope to find some nice people to relate to and to encourage me in my journey of recovery. Here goes nothing...(WARNING- this post went WAY longer then I expected... sorry about that :/)
I am a 32 year old married woman, been with my husband 10 years, married 5. We have no children yet but are starting to actively try to conceive. I work from home as a web and graphic designer- I LOVE my work, but of course being self-employed has it's challenges, and working from home means I don't get out much, don't have much 'fun' or social activity. Which doesn't help me with my 'problem'. I also have depression and anxiety, another contributor, as well as possibly some personality issues that make it hard to keep friends, makes me impulsive and sometimes offensive due to boundary issues, and who knows what else- I'm a train wreck lol.
As a teenager I got into drugs, the usual track record, from minor stuff to fun stuff to straight up hard addictions (heroin). After a few years of completely screwing my life up I was able to get clean off the evil H, but still did some minor stuff (to me anyway) like weed and X. Over the years I was happy to leave it mostly at social use, but drinking came into play as well (partly as I went from H to drinking, somehow that got me off the H, but I turned into an alcoholic drinking almost every day for a mercifully short spurt of time there). I was 18 at that time. 19 was a relatively mellow year, most addictions gone as I concentrated on my first serious job. After quitting that job though, I was back at it. Then once I turned 21, I was living on my own with a bf who was of the same smoke weed/ drink all the time for fun mindset, and I was back at it again. It didn't help that we had occasion to be at the bar a few times a week due to a team he was involved in that played pool at the local bars. I stink at pool lol, so instead I spent my time at the bars getting snockered, as I've heard it put lol.
Here's where the problem began- Binge Drinking. At that age it was a pretty popular thing, and most of my friends well, that was what we would do- that was what you did to have a good time, party, etc. Whoo hoo, fun times. But that was 11 years ago... here I am a married adult with a pretty good life, but I still feel that binge drinking is THE way to have fun. I don't drink every day by any means, so for a long time I thought eh, no big deal, I drink every weekend or every other weekend, I'm certainly not like my father, a 'real' alcoholic who drank from the time he came home from work to the time he passed out every evening. BUT at the same time I knew my drinking was a problem.
Because when I start drinking- I don't stop until I'm puking (rarely), passing out, or everyone's gone home or to bed and since the party's over I go to bed as well . I'm the last one to call it a night, partying til dawn quite often, and getting upset when others can't party that long with me- I never want the party to end. Over the years the way I behave when I'm drunk has gotten worse, as I've started having trouble with realizing I am drunk- even my husband has a hard time seeing that I am drunk, as it seems it creeps up on me and hits me all at once so I go from having fun to being completely wasted. And that's what I want- to be completely wasted and having a great time- problem is, my behavior can get out of hand. Mostly just being overbearing, life of the party to the extreme, lines of borders with people blur, and my impulsivity, which I have issues with when I'm sober, hits an all time high. This leads to offending people, or horrible embarrassment. Lately I've been winding up at the end of the night hysterically crying about how unhappy I am and well, saying things to my husband that I shouldn't, that he doesn't deserve, and that hurts him.
When I wake up the next day, a lot of times I don't remember the end of the evening- knowing my propensity for embarrassing myself etc, I am fraught with anxiety over what I may have said or done. This can evolve into full blown panic attacks. When I do remember most of the night, I go over and over and over it in my head to see what I did wrong, if I offended anyone, if everyone must think I'm a whack job, etc. I constantly have the fear that whoever we were hanging out with now hates me and won't want to be our friends anymore. If I recall being mean or just hurtful to my husband, I am despondent for having put him through that.
So obviously, drinking a lot is not good for me, or anyone around me. But I still do it, still feel the need to party and have fun and this is the only way I feel that same excitement. Several times a year it gets out of hand like this and I decide to stop drinking- mostly blaming anti depressants I'm on for making me so out of control and having awful hangovers where I am shaking and having panic attacks. I tell people I can't drink for awhile because of my medication. And it actually works for a few months- until I start feeling angry that I can't do what everyone else is doing. They can have a great time, why can't I? It's not fair! is what I think.... and so then I decide I should be able to too, and I'm back at it again. Rinse, Repeat.
I obviously can't keep doing this to myself and those around me. And as I said above, we are trying to conceive so alcohol is definitely out for a good long while for pregnancy and raising a child. My reason for being here now I guess is to make sure it is out for good. It really bothers me that I can't drink when others do, and I can't just drink a few glasses of wine, or a few beers, etc. I've tried that- works occasionally so I think I'm good, I got this! Then inevitably I'm back binge drinking and a disaster.
It's got to stop. I know that, everyone around me knows it but won't say anything (they do tend to enable me a bit), but this is up to me to do myself, for myself and for a better life. I hope I can find people here with the same kind of experiences to relate to, or just anyone here who knows what I'm going through and will maybe help cheer me along a bit
Sorry that's so long, but I've never gotten that out before to anyone, blogged a bit about it for my eyes only, but never publicly admitted it or really committed to such a change. But it's out there now, and I've got to stick to it.
Thanks for reading
~M
Sober since October
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: In the world in my eyes...Somewhere I've never been before...
Posts: 7,355
Hi, NeverBroken. Welcome to SR.
It is a great place to start recovery, and you'll find support and ecouragement here.
Keep us updated and feel free to share your emotions.
Take care.
It is a great place to start recovery, and you'll find support and ecouragement here.
Keep us updated and feel free to share your emotions.
Take care.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: NJ
Posts: 20,458
Please reconsider trying to conceive while you are drinking (fetal alcohol syndrome) and doing any recreational drugs. Get healthy FIRST.
make an appointment with your doctor or OB-gyno and tell them what you have told us. They are there to help you, not judge you.
make an appointment with your doctor or OB-gyno and tell them what you have told us. They are there to help you, not judge you.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Philly, Pa
Posts: 41
Hey NeverBroken, glad to have you at SR! I'm a pretty new member myself, and so far, it's been a great and supportive community. I can totally sympathize with a lot of what you said, the pushing ourselves till we're the last one's at a party standing, still drinking when the sun comes up, etc. Sometimes I wonder if us addicts and alcoholics have some sort of relationship to life where we want to try and wring ever second of experience out of things, and we do it by paradoxically embracing substances that do precisely the opposite, dull us to feeling. I can also comiserate with the anxiety attacks the next day, never quite knowing what you may have said or done, and wearing about what will happen when you encounter people who were there. My weekends were all busted after the shame of Saturday morning, and I'd be in a panic till I knew that people weren't pissed off at me, and I'd overanalyze everything: "Did this person not text back because I said something stupid on Friday? What did I post on Facebook? etc." I'm naturally neurotic (I'm sure we all are someway, otherwise we wouldn't have ended up addicted to drugs or alcohol) and the hangover, both physical and shame wise, exacerbated it.
For what it's worth, I've been sober for shortly over 90 days now, and life is MUCH better. I miss it sometimes, and I can still sense that part of me that drove me to keep drinking, but cutting it out has visibly made stuff better. While I was walking home from work today I was thinking about how there are certain things I NEVER have to put up with anymore, I don't have to wonder who I angered, I don't have to appologize for things I did, hell, I don't have to try and remember what it is that I did wrong in the first place! Welcome to SR, hope to see you around!
For what it's worth, I've been sober for shortly over 90 days now, and life is MUCH better. I miss it sometimes, and I can still sense that part of me that drove me to keep drinking, but cutting it out has visibly made stuff better. While I was walking home from work today I was thinking about how there are certain things I NEVER have to put up with anymore, I don't have to wonder who I angered, I don't have to appologize for things I did, hell, I don't have to try and remember what it is that I did wrong in the first place! Welcome to SR, hope to see you around!
Sober since October
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: In the world in my eyes...Somewhere I've never been before...
Posts: 7,355
You may also check our October class, where are people who also decided to quit drinking in October. First days may be hard to cope with, but it is much easier when you are not alone, especially for you, working at home.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...art-3-a-6.html
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...art-3-a-6.html
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: NY
Posts: 13
Originally Posted by Fandy 
Please reconsider trying to conceive while you are drinking (fetal alcohol syndrome) and doing any recreational drugs. Get healthy FIRST.
make an appointment with your doctor or OB-gyno and tell them what you have told us. They are there to help you, not judge you.
make an appointment with your doctor or OB-gyno and tell them what you have told us. They are there to help you, not judge you.
For me, there will not be an issue with physical withdrawal, that has never happened for me. This is a psychological battle. Just knowing that my dream of parenthood is being realized I know will be the biggest motivator in my recovery. As well, my husband who has enabled me in the past would never *let* me drink while pregnant, and I was never one to drink alone- the whole point of drinking was the social aspect for me.
Oh, and I no longer do drugs- the last 5 years or so I have only occasionally smoked pot, and again, only socially. Frankly half the time I do so these days I wind up with crazy anxiety anyway. But again, that was a few times a year with friends (usually while we were drinking), and is out the window with the drinking
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: NY
Posts: 13
Originally Posted by Edabisco
Hey NeverBroken, glad to have you at SR! I'm a pretty new member myself, and so far, it's been a great and supportive community. I can totally sympathize with a lot of what you said, the pushing ourselves till we're the last one's at a party standing, still drinking when the sun comes up, etc. Sometimes I wonder if us addicts and alcoholics have some sort of relationship to life where we want to try and wring ever second of experience out of things, and we do it by paradoxically embracing substances that do precisely the opposite, dull us to feeling. I can also comiserate with the anxiety attacks the next day, never quite knowing what you may have said or done, and wearing about what will happen when you encounter people who were there. My weekends were all busted after the shame of Saturday morning, and I'd be in a panic till I knew that people weren't pissed off at me, and I'd overanalyze everything: "Did this person not text back because I said something stupid on Friday? What did I post on Facebook? etc." I'm naturally neurotic (I'm sure we all are someway, otherwise we wouldn't have ended up addicted to drugs or alcohol) and the hangover, both physical and shame wise, exacerbated it.
For what it's worth, I've been sober for shortly over 90 days now, and life is MUCH better. I miss it sometimes, and I can still sense that part of me that drove me to keep drinking, but cutting it out has visibly made stuff better. While I was walking home from work today I was thinking about how there are certain things I NEVER have to put up with anymore, I don't have to wonder who I angered, I don't have to appologize for things I did, hell, I don't have to try and remember what it is that I did wrong in the first place! Welcome to SR, hope to see you around!
For what it's worth, I've been sober for shortly over 90 days now, and life is MUCH better. I miss it sometimes, and I can still sense that part of me that drove me to keep drinking, but cutting it out has visibly made stuff better. While I was walking home from work today I was thinking about how there are certain things I NEVER have to put up with anymore, I don't have to wonder who I angered, I don't have to appologize for things I did, hell, I don't have to try and remember what it is that I did wrong in the first place! Welcome to SR, hope to see you around!
Thanks for sharing your experience, knowing it's not just me who's the crazy party animal is helpful. With all my issues I have, I get down on myself so much, and feel like I'm the only one going through...whatever it is at that time. Not being alone helps indeed And your thought of switching how you think about it- that you're not missing out, you're actually gaining more back- like my Sunday's and Mondays and getting rid of recurrent anxiety and rumination on what I may have done, is a fantastic idea!
And thank you Blue, I will check out the October class you mention!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: NJ
Posts: 20,458
I was reading that you are actively trying to concieve...and that you are still drinking. many times you won't know you are pregnant for a few weeks and could still be ingesting alcohol (and X idk)?
you might want to wait until you are sober a couple of months before trying to conceive. If you drink until blackout often, you have so much alcohol in your body that you have never gone long enough to experience withdrawal. it takes time to detox.
How long has it been since you last had a drink?
(oh and welcome to SR too)
you might want to wait until you are sober a couple of months before trying to conceive. If you drink until blackout often, you have so much alcohol in your body that you have never gone long enough to experience withdrawal. it takes time to detox.
How long has it been since you last had a drink?
(oh and welcome to SR too)
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: NY
Posts: 13
Originally Posted by Fandy
I was reading that you are actively trying to concieve...and that you are still drinking. many times you won't know you are pregnant for a few weeks and could still be ingesting alcohol (and X idk)?
you might want to wait until you are sober a couple of months before trying to conceive. If you drink until blackout often, you have so much alcohol in your body that you have never gone long enough to experience withdrawal. it takes time to detox.
How long has it been since you last had a drink?
(oh and welcome to SR too)
you might want to wait until you are sober a couple of months before trying to conceive. If you drink until blackout often, you have so much alcohol in your body that you have never gone long enough to experience withdrawal. it takes time to detox.
How long has it been since you last had a drink?
(oh and welcome to SR too)
Haven't used X in at least 5 years now, I've found it is hell on depression meds, and was no longer a pleasant experience for me.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: NY
Posts: 13
Originally Posted by Dee74
Welcome to SR neverbroken
You'll find a lot of support here...do you have any ideas on a plan to stay sober?
D
You'll find a lot of support here...do you have any ideas on a plan to stay sober?
D
But I know I'm going to need to find some way to replace the 'fun' weekends I live for.... cutting out drinking will definitely limit what I can do socially as I know myself pretty well and realize that when I'm around others drinking I get envious and upset that I 'can't' drink... and many times decided I am entitled to do it too. So I have to rethink how I have fun... and find some replacements. I know they won't be as fun in the beginning, but then that motivation from above comes into play.
But trying to conceive and take that next life step changes my thoughts on a lot of things, and the motivation there is intense to do everything I have to for my chances at pregnancy, and throughout the process. The fear comes for afterwards though, when I may not have as much motivation... where I can say to myself, oh, I can have a few drinks, it's the weekend, babies' with a sitter... or something to that effect. But I really believe this is the time for me that I can finally do it, as I'll be changing my life from 'party girl' to 'Mom'.
As I well, I know in my heart that I sometimes drink because I am unhappy with my life, and being a parent has been a long dream, leaving me with an emptiness for a long time. So now that we can take that next step... hoping I will have less of a reason for drinking period.
My mind set has to completely change and that is going to be the hardest part. I think support and accountability will be the key.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 21
NeverBroken -
I'm new here too and what you write I could have written almost exactly. Apart from my partner won't even be around me when I'm drunk as he hates that side of me (don't blame him, neither do I). Welcome and good luck!
My last drink was on Friday when I had a mad, scary, awful blackout binge...it's all going well so far but then again like you it's a totally psychological problem so I just hope that I can battle it. I'm planning to try and avoid people who I usually drink with for a while in hopes I can kick start it that way.
I'm new here too and what you write I could have written almost exactly. Apart from my partner won't even be around me when I'm drunk as he hates that side of me (don't blame him, neither do I). Welcome and good luck!
My last drink was on Friday when I had a mad, scary, awful blackout binge...it's all going well so far but then again like you it's a totally psychological problem so I just hope that I can battle it. I'm planning to try and avoid people who I usually drink with for a while in hopes I can kick start it that way.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: NY
Posts: 13
Originally Posted by CentralParkGirl
NeverBroken -
I'm new here too and what you write I could have written almost exactly. Apart from my partner won't even be around me when I'm drunk as he hates that side of me (don't blame him, neither do I). Welcome and good luck!
My last drink was on Friday when I had a mad, scary, awful blackout binge...it's all going well so far but then again like you it's a totally psychological problem so I just hope that I can battle it. I'm planning to try and avoid people who I usually drink with for a while in hopes I can kick start it that way.
I'm new here too and what you write I could have written almost exactly. Apart from my partner won't even be around me when I'm drunk as he hates that side of me (don't blame him, neither do I). Welcome and good luck!
My last drink was on Friday when I had a mad, scary, awful blackout binge...it's all going well so far but then again like you it's a totally psychological problem so I just hope that I can battle it. I'm planning to try and avoid people who I usually drink with for a while in hopes I can kick start it that way.
Sorry you're going through a similar situation, but glad you have to decided to change as I have. Avoiding people who you drink with is a very good idea- I will be doing the same- people and places. I've started playing video games and crocheting again, and I always have graphic design which besides being my job I also love doing for fun. Cuddling in bed with hubby watching a movie... now that I've thought a bit about it since my last post, I know there are lots of alternatives for me. I have two dogs that I love watching and playing with, a very peaceful and blissful maternal thing going on there lol. Distractions are going to help I'm sure.
Not to mention the Sunday's I won't be hungover any more! I always love a Sunday I wake up feeling great and am able to really enjoy the day, as opposed to feeling horrible and sleeping half the day, then not wanting to leave the couch. So that's something I will keep in mind as motivation- drinking for fun one night is really not worth ruining my entire Sunday, and even feeling crappy into Monday and not getting the work done I need to.
Thanks for sharing
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
I had to make a lot of changes in my life - not only with various people, places and things - but in the way I thought about myself and the world, and my place in it.
I needed to go beyond just keeping busy.
It can be quite daunting to start...but as I said there's a lot of support here - a few ideas too
I don't think you can do better than to read and post here for a while...if all else fails, find someone who 'has what you want' and ask them what they did
D
I needed to go beyond just keeping busy.
It can be quite daunting to start...but as I said there's a lot of support here - a few ideas too
I don't think you can do better than to read and post here for a while...if all else fails, find someone who 'has what you want' and ask them what they did
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: NY
Posts: 13
Originally Posted by Dee74
I had to make a lot of changes in my life - not only with various people, places and things - but in the way I thought about myself and the world, and my place in it.
I needed to go beyond just keeping busy.
It can be quite daunting to start...but as I said there's a lot of support here - a few ideas too
I don't think you can do better than to read and post here for a while...if all else fails, find someone who 'has what you want' and ask them what they did
D
I needed to go beyond just keeping busy.
It can be quite daunting to start...but as I said there's a lot of support here - a few ideas too
I don't think you can do better than to read and post here for a while...if all else fails, find someone who 'has what you want' and ask them what they did
D
I will be reading a LOT in here for sure. And having a place where others understand to post when I have urges and maybe get some suggestions to battle them, etc is awesome.Thank you all for being so welcoming!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 21
Yes and the places, too. Lots of bars and stuff where I am. Avoid!
Ooh video games, thats great. I love gaming with my partner a lot as well. Im off out with my friend to do some indoor climbing on Saturday which I love. Cuddling with a movie cannot be beaten for enjoyment, its so nice!
I have a couple of pets I can tend to as well...their little faces bring me joy!
Hangover days are days wasted.It'll be good to get them back too.
Thanks for sharing as well. Its nice to talk to someone about my age etc that understands..
Ooh video games, thats great. I love gaming with my partner a lot as well. Im off out with my friend to do some indoor climbing on Saturday which I love. Cuddling with a movie cannot be beaten for enjoyment, its so nice!
I have a couple of pets I can tend to as well...their little faces bring me joy!
Hangover days are days wasted.It'll be good to get them back too.
Thanks for sharing as well. Its nice to talk to someone about my age etc that understands..
Originally Posted by NeverBroken
Nice to meet you Sorry you're going through a similar situation, but glad you have to decided to change as I have. Avoiding people who you drink with is a very good idea- I will be doing the same- people and places.
I've started playing video games and crocheting again, and I always have graphic design which besides being my job I also love doing for fun. Cuddling in bed with hubby watching a movie... now that I've thought a bit about it since my last post, I know there are lots of alternatives for me. I have two dogs that I love watching and playing with, a very peaceful and blissful maternal thing going on there lol. Distractions are going to help I'm sure.
Not to mention the Sunday's I won't be hungover any more! I always love a Sunday I wake up feeling great and am able to really enjoy the day, as opposed to feeling horrible and sleeping half the day, then not wanting to leave the couch. So that's something I will keep in mind as motivation- drinking for fun one night is really not worth ruining my entire Sunday, and even feeling crappy into Monday and not getting the work done I need to.
Thanks for sharing
Sorry you're going through a similar situation, but glad you have to decided to change as I have. Avoiding people who you drink with is a very good idea- I will be doing the same- people and places. I've started playing video games and crocheting again, and I always have graphic design which besides being my job I also love doing for fun. Cuddling in bed with hubby watching a movie... now that I've thought a bit about it since my last post, I know there are lots of alternatives for me. I have two dogs that I love watching and playing with, a very peaceful and blissful maternal thing going on there lol. Distractions are going to help I'm sure.
Not to mention the Sunday's I won't be hungover any more! I always love a Sunday I wake up feeling great and am able to really enjoy the day, as opposed to feeling horrible and sleeping half the day, then not wanting to leave the couch. So that's something I will keep in mind as motivation- drinking for fun one night is really not worth ruining my entire Sunday, and even feeling crappy into Monday and not getting the work done I need to.
Thanks for sharing
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Denver, CO
Posts: 43
It is my understanding that alcoholism comes in many forms to many different people. Although your issues with alcohol may not mirror that of your father's, your experiences warrant just as much attention and care.
Have you thought of talking to your husband about your concerns? Until I began talking with my family about my problems, and attending AA on a regular basis, I continued to live in a "drink, regret, promise to stop, and drink again" cycle.
Maybe you should look for a meeting in your area? Although I've relapsed while I was still going to AA, the program has put me in a direction where I know I can maintain a sober lifestyle much easier than if I tried to do it on my own.
I am very new to living a sober lifestyle so take what I say with a grain of salt. I just wanted to give you a few of my thoughts.
I hope your struggles are solved with the least amount of resistance.
Good luck!
Have you thought of talking to your husband about your concerns? Until I began talking with my family about my problems, and attending AA on a regular basis, I continued to live in a "drink, regret, promise to stop, and drink again" cycle.
Maybe you should look for a meeting in your area? Although I've relapsed while I was still going to AA, the program has put me in a direction where I know I can maintain a sober lifestyle much easier than if I tried to do it on my own.
I am very new to living a sober lifestyle so take what I say with a grain of salt. I just wanted to give you a few of my thoughts.
I hope your struggles are solved with the least amount of resistance.
Good luck!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Vancouver BC Canada
Posts: 384
Welcome to SR NeverBorken. Lots of info and support here.
Quitting something might mean you need a plan and support to make the changes. There are lot of options from spiritual to secular and lots of information on all of them in the various forums here on SR. Heck SR is a great place to get support and information.
My alcoholism really was going in my 30's but I denied it and the real ugly stuff got going in my 40's. I was never an every day drinker buts its how I drank and what happened when I drank that convinced me I was an alcoholic. I can't tell if you are , only you can. Great idea to see a doctor and be really honest as most doctors can really help and most have patients who have drinking issues as drinking problems are not that uncommon it seems sadly. You story sounds a bit like mine when I was 32 and that was a while ago for me.
I have and I am still making changes to stay sober and that's okay with me as I want my sobriety more than anything else , at all times. If I am not sober than everything else in my life is at risk in a big way , but that's where I am at. I truly hold to the old cliche "If nothing changes nothing changes"
There are quite a few standard questionnaires out there to give you a sense if your drinking is a problem and possibly how large a problem. Google search should turn up quite a few quickly.
Welcome and hope you find some help here on SR
Quitting something might mean you need a plan and support to make the changes. There are lot of options from spiritual to secular and lots of information on all of them in the various forums here on SR. Heck SR is a great place to get support and information.
My alcoholism really was going in my 30's but I denied it and the real ugly stuff got going in my 40's. I was never an every day drinker buts its how I drank and what happened when I drank that convinced me I was an alcoholic. I can't tell if you are , only you can. Great idea to see a doctor and be really honest as most doctors can really help and most have patients who have drinking issues as drinking problems are not that uncommon it seems sadly. You story sounds a bit like mine when I was 32 and that was a while ago for me.
I have and I am still making changes to stay sober and that's okay with me as I want my sobriety more than anything else , at all times. If I am not sober than everything else in my life is at risk in a big way , but that's where I am at. I truly hold to the old cliche "If nothing changes nothing changes"
There are quite a few standard questionnaires out there to give you a sense if your drinking is a problem and possibly how large a problem. Google search should turn up quite a few quickly.
Welcome and hope you find some help here on SR
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