Delilah1

Today is day 3 and it is the first time I feel shaky and on edge. The doctor gave me medicine to take and lower the dosage each day, I have been trying just to take it early afternoon and that seemed okay. I took one pill this morning and I am currently taking a break from my walk because I feel jumpy. I talked to my mom as I was walking and that helped. I have about thirty minutes before I have to pick the kids up from CCD. Is it normal not to feel any reactions the first two days and then suddenly feel on edge?

I also told my kids this morning that mommy has decided to stop drinking wine because she wants to be healthier. I explained it is okay when they see someone in our family having wine or beer, because I don't want them to think it is a bad thing for everyone. I explained it to them that just like when I tell them one or sometimes two cookies is enough, Mommy was having too much wine and has decided that it is better for me not to have any. My oldest daughter said, wow, that is going to be hard you drink wine every day (amazing what they notice, that I didn't know.) and I said you are right, but I haven't had any wine for the past two days. I also told them that sometimes when you try to stop doing something that you do all the time you get grumpy, so I want you to tell me if I am being grumpy with any of you. My oldest again said her teacher is working on using a quieter voice, and the class came up with a signal to remind her if her voice was too loud. I asked the three of them what they thought a good symbol would be and my five year old said I know a face like this, and he made a frown.

So this morning I gained wisdom from my children 5,7 and 9. I just need to make sure to keep breathing. I plan on going to a meeting when my husband gets home today, and they know I wi be taking classes to help mommy be healthier.

So a few questions for those with more wisdom and time in recovery:
-Was it okay to share this with my kids?
-Is it normal to feel like this on he third day when I didn't the first two?
-Suggestions to help with the anxiety and on edge feelings?

I am also a die hard Yankee fan, so watching Jeter get hurt and the Yanks lose last night in 12 stunk!!!

Thanks for the support!

Anna

Yes, it is normal. The withdrawls from alcohol can last for days and sometimes change from day to day. I hope that you feel better soon.

Personally, I wouldn't have told my kids, not yet. In fact, I had let my family down numerous times so I didn't say anything to anyone. I stopped drinking and began to change and allowed my family to see the changes in me. But, that's just me and you know how your family will react to your news, and you're right that kids notice much more than we think they do.

Exercise is really great for helping with anxiety. Have you tried meditating and controlled breathing? It's a really good way to calm yourself. Music is also very helpful to me.

Natom

Whilst I don't know all that much about alcohol withdrawal as I have never suffered from it (at least not on it's own) I can say that I felt a bizarre numbness for about week after putting down drugs. I then felt a wave of emotions all come to the surface. These kinda levelled out after a few weeks of sobriety though.

Lionhearted1

Yes it's perfectly normal i was still having withdrawels after 3 weeks but they do settle down and go. As for telling your kids that's totally your decision I just hope you stick to it and don't feel like you have let them down if you do relapse because guilt does not help anything.

Well done on giving it up it will be tough but it's so worth it, today I looked at my beautiful daughters face and it felt amazing that iam totally present and not consumed with my own crap through drinking...

waynemali

My withdrawals didn't kick in until about three weeks later, starting with headaches at first then on to full on body aches, everything ached and I nearly caved in and reached for a bottle, but managed to get a grip by reaching out to a friend from church when I was really at a low.

In total they lasted about three weeks, hard times, but I'm so glad I stayed strong and got past them, 200 days sober for me tomorrow.

Delilah1

Thanks to all of you. Wayne, 200 days that is awesome, congratulations!!!! I was on the fence about telling the kids, but it just seemed like the right thing to do, I also think it will be added motivation to stick with it.

I really appreciate SR and having a forum where people know what I am going through.

artsoul

Hi Delilah -

I think you have to trust your instincts when it comes to talking to your kids. Mine were older, but I had essentially the same conversation. I think what you told them was perfect.

waynemali

My kids knew I drunk, after all I used to take them to the shop with me and buy them sweets when I got my wine or cider, or whatever. When I stopped drinking I stopped going into that shop, one day I walked passed with the kids, one of them asked why we didn't go in there any more (they are only 11 & 6 years old), I explained I had stopped drinking because it was making me ill and I wanted to get better.

It was the truth, it was making me ill, my chronic high blood pressure was back to very high levels, even though I've been on 3 pills a day to keep it under control, I think I stopped in time, a heart attack was right around the corner.

Being honest with them is good, that's a lesson we try to teach them everyday, why should we lie to them, in a way that's as bad an example to them as drinking is.

Stay strong, you can do this.

Delilah1

Thanks Artsoul and Wayne. I am going to bake with them today and then we are cooking dinner together. I am shifting my focus to the important things in life. usually Sundays i will have one too many drinks as i watch football.There is a 6:30 AA meeting that is closed for women that I plan on going to. So early dinner, and leaving dishes for my husband.

waynemali

That sounds great, the one thing I know I need to do is spend a little more time doing things with my kids, but I'm working on it.

Have a good day & stay strong.

Itchy

Hang in there Delilah and keep letting us know how it goes. I had a rough time for several months but I am older and drank from morning to passing out. 2 years now and whether you have a week or a month or more of discomfort it is worth every bit of it in hindsight. Some get here and don't know what to do with themselves. They need to stop grieving for clubs and dark places, and break out into the sunlight.

Kids have a way of doing that for us if we just see ourselves through their eyes.

FreeFall

I think you handled it really nicely with your kids. I like the cookie analogy
You're the one who knows them best and knows what's appropriate. Sounds like you're on a nice start! Yes, day 3 was horrid. Day 4 was a whole lot better, that was just my experience.