sorrow for the alcoholic that still suffers.
Crazy Cat Lady
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 2,661
sorrow for the alcoholic that still suffers.
I took a walk today and passed a man sitting on a porch swigging vodka from a rather large, mostly empty bottle of vodka in the middle of the day. I first felt shock then sorrow mixed with guilt. Does he suffer too? Does he know about the gift of sobriety? How i wanted to tell him that there's another way of living. A new life. All at the tip of his fingers if he just reached out for it. But i kept walking. I know it isn't my place to force sobriety on anyone. All i can do is be there for someone when they reach out. And maybe this is why i'm so strongly opinionated in my posts here but i don't want to know that anyone who reached out here ended up drunk on their porch. I feel sorrow every time i hear about a DUI or another person arrested for doing something foolish while drunk. At least people who relapse are trying. So while you are walking your path of sobriety, keep in mind the people who are still suffering with no hope and be grateful that at least you now know the path is there. Some people never find it.
Sorry for the downer, but that guy really got to me today and i've been reflecting on it alot.
Sorry for the downer, but that guy really got to me today and i've been reflecting on it alot.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
It really is a disease that shows no mercy....there but for the grace of God go I. At the end of my HG meeting we always do a moment of silence for the sick and suffering...In and outside of the rooms. Followed by the Lord's Prayer.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: South East England
Posts: 8,009
Yes, seeing an obvious reminder of someone who is lost to it is a jolt to us all isn't it?
One of my best friends has an alcoholic exH. He is slowly dying. He sits alone in his flat having lost his family, job and friends. His health is failing fast. My friend is not a drinker and has no understanding. She is filled with understandable outrage at his lack of care towards himself and his children. Her kids (and her daughter is my daughters close friend) are growing up with bewilderment, sadness and anger.
When I think of him I can only feel pain. He cannot see a future. He has 2 beautiful teenage children who love and need him. He has no empathy and feels he has no power to change his destiny.
I also believe everybody here knows there is a way out. They may not have found which way works for them, they may still struggle, but they're actively walking towards the solution.
Keep going everyone. The alternative really isn't worth contemplating x
One of my best friends has an alcoholic exH. He is slowly dying. He sits alone in his flat having lost his family, job and friends. His health is failing fast. My friend is not a drinker and has no understanding. She is filled with understandable outrage at his lack of care towards himself and his children. Her kids (and her daughter is my daughters close friend) are growing up with bewilderment, sadness and anger.
When I think of him I can only feel pain. He cannot see a future. He has 2 beautiful teenage children who love and need him. He has no empathy and feels he has no power to change his destiny.
I also believe everybody here knows there is a way out. They may not have found which way works for them, they may still struggle, but they're actively walking towards the solution.
Keep going everyone. The alternative really isn't worth contemplating x
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 1,422
Mad, isn't it? It's easy to think, man, that so easily could have been me...
...dude, that WAS me. I was killing myself, ignoring the pain, shoving poison down my throat, hating my family for making me feel guilty about it, ignoring all the warnings and my deteriorating health.
Ugh.
...dude, that WAS me. I was killing myself, ignoring the pain, shoving poison down my throat, hating my family for making me feel guilty about it, ignoring all the warnings and my deteriorating health.
Ugh.
Sober Alcoholic
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 3,539
Jen, any chance that your friends alcoholic ex might agree to a 12th step call? Your central office should have a list of people willing to go out and talk to him. Perhaps his ex could ask him if he was willing to meet with someone. Then, it’s just a matter of finding a couple of guys he might listen to. It’s often the only thing left for someone who’s way down that hole.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: South East England
Posts: 8,009
He has been in AA in the past I believe. He has moved away and severed contact with everyone now. His son who is 19, has talked to me about it. He still goes round there unannounced and lets himself in. His dad just sits with the curtains drawn and cries. There are people who check in on him and when he disappears, the police go round. He has been under crisis mental health intervention. He just appears to have given up...
If I knew what to do I would do it. He just refuses all offers. It's dreadfully sad. I haven't seen him for a couple of years now since his divorce. I only hear his story through the eyes of my friends and her 2 heartbroken kids.
Maybe I should have another chat with the son...
If I knew what to do I would do it. He just refuses all offers. It's dreadfully sad. I haven't seen him for a couple of years now since his divorce. I only hear his story through the eyes of my friends and her 2 heartbroken kids.
Maybe I should have another chat with the son...
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