Squizz

I went out with my dad at the local Italian club for a fish fry for Good Friday. Needless to say, there was plenty of vino to go around. Yet I didn't even feel the desire to drink. And being the youngest guy at the table, it was my "duty" to get bottles of wine from the bar.

I went for a couple of reasons: To make sure my dad didn't drink and drive. And to spend time with my dad. Thankfully, nobody really pushed booze on me too much.

Although, I do admit, I started feeling cocky. I started to feel like, "Hey, maybe I can do this with the old drinking buddies."

Yeah right. I've played that game before, and it's always resulted in a relapse. I passed this test, and I'm moving forward.

Tomorrow morning I'm finally going to do a 5th step with my sponsor after six years in AA.

I'm sick of not giving AA a fair shake. No wonder I keep going out, and feeling dry even when I am sober.

It's time to start taking the program seriously, and quit fooling around.

I've even been getting involved in service work at my homegroup.

And guess what? It's working. I'm closing out day 35 in about half an hour. And I can only attribute that to two things:

1)The God of my understanding
and
2)The people of these forums and of Alcoholics Anonymous.

Because left to my own ways, I'd be drunk in a day or two max! I know, because I've tried doing it on my own. So in closing, I would just like to say thank you. Without your support, none of this would have been possible.

stillsleeping

It's 04:36 over here and your post was the first thing I've read today. That was cool, man - thanks and well done on amazing work. Day 34 for me - I'm runnin in your shadow!

Sleep well

Dee74

You're showing a lot of recovery there Squizz, IMO - good going, man

D

Squizz

HAHA. Well thank you. But you're wrong about something. And that is this: All we've got is today. It truly is one day at a time, no more, no less.

I saw just how valuable staying sober is tonight. I was nodding off in the library on a couch (exhausted from a long day at work and due to my allergies) when I was startled by a drunk guy falling on his face.

I felt terrible for the guy. And all I could think in my head was this: "I never want anyone to ever have to see me in that sorta' shape again for the rest of my life."

I don't want people to feel for me, the way I felt for that guy. (And he was a complete stranger. Yet I still felt sympathy for him, because I've been in that boat.)

stillsleeping

Me? Wrong? Surely you jest! Hehe... I was born wrong. And then discovered booze heh

I like the idea of today and I'm goin to live the hell out of it, but I need a tomorrow too. I have real ambition for the first time. Ever. My H summed it up for us a few weeks ago - he said that while we were using it was enough to talk about all the cool stuff we were going to do one day. Now we're sober, we're beginning to be able to believe that we can make some of that stuff happen...

I was in a similar situation the other day. I had to go to the pub (won't go into the details. it's in a thread somewhere) near tears with panic, and a middle aged woman, drunk to the max, stumbled in front of me in the street, bellowed something about not getting in her way right in my face, then disappeared into a pub.

After I'd curbed my first instinct to pop her in the jaw (I don't want to be fisty. I will not get into a fight) I realised what a great reminder it was. I was all upset that I couldn't have a beer, when I should have been celebrating the fact.

I like it when stuff comes together like that.

We saw her in town later btw. With a guy, blood on his face. They were both well dressed (apart from the blood) politely asking tourists for change. She threw up. He stroked her back. It was desperately, desperately sad.

Wow. Disappeared for a moment there. Sorry about your allergies dude. That sucks xx

InsertNameHere

I ditto that sentiment, for a long time I had plans that I never really thought would go through mainly because non of my others ever did. Now I am starting to think that since I am not drinking I just might be able to have the motivation to ensure that what I want to happen does, at least to the extent that I can control anyway.

Plot of land with a big old garden and some animals here I come. yep I am that country

stillsleeping

I'll warn the animals :rotfxko

InsertNameHere

hahahaha you do that , they might appreciate not being dinner one day

BillyPilgrim

Still, are you trying to outdee dee by being on here 24/7?